Ubuu, I need your advice, preferably female. I know there's probably some other place better for this kind of thing, but I basically haven't used the internet other than to lurk on chans, science and programming, some indie game development blogs and the dark side of the japanese web for about 9 years. In other words, this is basically the only place where I even post, and I wouldn't even know about other place where I could write it. Really, you guys are the only people I feel comfortable with to talk about this. It's going to be slightly long so, please, forgive me in advance.
Long story short, I've started college some time ago. I was your typical anon, that is to say, my idea of social skills was very poor, I am a knee-deep weeaboo and I was a loner kid through my adolescence. Luckily, I haven't got any problem with just talking with people, but I do have a real problem on long-term relationships of any sort. How people could maintain contact, go out and share meals and whatever, hell, talk daily was a slightly odd idea for me, mainly because I've never made acquittance with people who would be interested in talking with me that much; the concept has been always slightly alien to me. It just seemed weird, if I had to go out I felt I wouldn't know how to react, engulfed by a feeling of being lost – out of place, as my surroundings would become blurry and I would just sit there with the head low and muted. That's the kind of impression I always got of "going out" with people – and on the very title occasions this happened, it was like that (mostly before college).
Some time forward, about a year after starting college, I managed to start talking with people and forming some basic "contact" – that is to say, we knew each other names and we got together to study – sort of relationship with a bunch of guys I met there, which later grew into what you could call friendship (or at least I believe so, as I said, I suck at judging these things, but I'm fairly sure you can call it that). We shared similar interests so that made it easier for me to relax and actually be a bit of myself with nerd jokes among other things, which increased my self-esteem to talk with other people in other classes too, even of normal things I wouldn't normally care to discuss that much. Mostly out of courtesy, but overall they weren't boring people, and I was also interested in how far I could go handling it (which thankfully, went all right in thePost too long. Click here to view the full text.