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/hikki/ - NEET / Advice

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News Post - Ten More Years!

File: 1467565037281.jpg (122.25 KB, 1300x1300, social-network.jpg)

 No.1715[Reply]

(The old thread was unstickied because it got bogged down with dead links and is difficult to navigate.)

New Rule: One post per service please! Duplicate ads may be deleted. This especially includes discord links. To make a permanent discord link, click on instant invite, go to advanced settings, and change the expire time to never.

Do you have a neat web community or chat group you'd like to invite people to? Maybe want to drop your messaging handle and strike up some conversations? Do it here.

Chat/community/personal ads are no longer allowed on the rest of the board.

Important Note: This doesn't mean that you can't talk about communities or chat groups. You could, for example, have a thread where you ask people about web communities they visit. You just can't open your thread with an advertisement.

EFFECTIVE 01/24/2017: DO NOT POST NON-PERMANENT DISCORD INVITES. DEAD LINKS ARE A NUISSANCE AND SHOULD NOT BE IN THIS THREAD. IF YOUR DISCORD LINK EXPIRES YOUR POST WILL BE DELETED AND YOU WILL RECEIVE A WARNING BAN.

Old thread (bumplocked): >>3
98 posts and 46 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.5427

>>5426
You don't have to be an asshole in order to convey your displeasure about something, especially when it isn't even a relevant answer to a specific question.



File: 1454626044524.jpg (18.8 KB, 704x400, Satou.jpg)

 No.172[Reply]

Seeing as absolutely everyone misread the /hikki/ rules sticky and used it to draw apocalyptic conclusions about the death of all that was good about /n/, here's a less flippant sticky with less room for ambiguity, in the form of a Q&A. We've also made some concessions based on your feedback in thread >>13, which was moved to /sugg/ for being meta.

What is allowed on this board? What is its purpose?
On this board you can discuss and request or give advice regarding NEETism, Hikikomoriism, anxieties and social or mental issues arising from these conditions of living, and things closely related to these topics. If you're content with being a NEET at this stage in your life, that's ok, and you won't get in trouble for saying so. The board's primary focus is self-help and advice regarding these issues, and particularly help in escaping the NEET lifestyle, but this focus is not exclusive. Despite rumors, threads looking for help with suicidal feelings or drug addition are also allowed.

What is not allowed on this board?
* Encouraging others to become NEET.
* Attacking or discouraging others for being NEET.
* Giving or requesting advice on how to enter the NEET lifestyle.
* Encouraging or showcasing drug usage.
* Announcing your planned suicide. Call a hotline or something just don't do it here or it becomes my legal responsibility.
* Helping others to plan or commit suicide.
* Topics not related to the purpose of the board. Such topics will be moved.
* Intentionally breaking these rules or the global rules will still result in a warning or ban.
* Rule 6 is enforced more liberally on /hikki/. Users may be banned from /hikki/ for inflammatory remarks in cases which might not result in a ban on other boards.
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.


File: 1541279807832.jpg (169.91 KB, 900x900, unnamed.jpg)

 No.5245[Reply]

being alone for so long has stunted my ability to talk so much that i can barely construct full sentences in my head, let alone hold a conversation with anyone
19 posts and 4 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.5453

>>5451
This is a naive oversimplification. People who have had shitty lives can actually be better adjusted than people who do have some good memories from the past. Individual dispositions play a bigger role then good to bad memory ratio. Fulfilling your immediate needs and getting professional help for your problems is the best course of action.

 No.5454

File: 1548012903980.jpg (161.11 KB, 1920x1080, servaltear.jpg)

>>5447
>Normal people suffer when they near someone who suffer.
No, they only superficially care in order to keep up the facade. I doubt they genuinely care about a stranger whom they don't already have an affinity to.

 No.5455

>>5454
Wrong, false. While people can and do bullshit, a lot of the times, they'll actually feel bad in the moment but wont take meaningful action or still give a shit five minutes later.

 No.5456

>>5447
You have a point but I wouldn't say that "suffer" is the right word. Most of the time I do get overwhelmed around people who are in a bad situation, but the decision to care or not is something else. I tend to keep distance especially if I can't help.

 No.5457

>>5453
I respect hikkies as i am hikki too. And i assume problem desribed here is not a simple one like "my girl dont apriciate my football skill"

Profesional help. Do you have emough money for that?

>>5454
The way you look on it depends.

It is a question like "my wife is simulating in the bed what i should feel about it?". Normal person dont give a fuck is it simulation or not. Feel-ish bu normally-egoistic person would thank "wife" because she put an effort to please that person.
But only a depressive one would feels tricked and cheated.

>>5456
Depression is a internal suffering. Watch Sapolsky.



File: 1545109921315.gif (733.61 KB, 500x281, sad.gif)

 No.5331[Reply]

When I have to interact with people, quite often, they will find a way to misinterpret my anxiety. There are many misinterpretations, but they all seem to revolve around the other person involved. They think I must only be anxious because of them, not realizing that people with social anxiety are pretty much always anxious around people, except perhaps around their family members or a small group of friends. But around people they don't know, they will be anxious.

I have been accused of racism for being anxious around non-white people at my college's cafeteria, despite the fact that I get social anxiety around white people too. One time, a female counselor implied that I must be anxious around women, not understanding that I am anxious around men too. People have said thinks like "anon is bad at talking to girls" or "or anon gay?" but I am just bad at talking to people in general. Saying I'm "bad at talking to girls" implies that I'm good at talking to guys, which is not true.

The female counselor I saw sent me to a male counselor in the same counseling office place and I was anxious around him too. He seemed to take it personally and thought it was about him as an individual. Very unprofessional across the board. He also asked me about drugs and alcohol and I told him about my drinking, and so he thought I must be anxious because of drinking too often (it's the opposite: I drink too much to cope with anxiety, not the other way around).

Another time, someone invited me to volunteer at a homeless shelter. I was sleep-deprived and also still had social anxiety, because I always have it, and being in a situation where I had to serve people food and talk to them made it especially bad. The person who invited me implied that I was afraid of homeless people, even though they've seen how I act around other people.

A final example was how I was invited by my friend to spend Thanksgiving with him and his family. They are extremely loud and outgoing and it was a little intimidating with all the questions and being put on the spot a few times. My friend thought I really enjoyed checking my phone, when in reality I was only doing it to avoid making eye contact or to cope with my extreme anxiety.

I don't get the impression that very many people truly understand what I'm going through, and these accusations make it even worse.

Have people ever misinterpreted your mental health issues? If so, what happened?
13 posts and 6 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.5349

>>5348
That just means they lack empathy. They don't have social anxiety, therefore they think nobody else has it. But people with empathy are able to understand that not everyone is exactly the same. For example, you don't have to have another mental health issue, such as an eating disorder, to see that it's also a legitimate problem.

But don't let people convince you otherwise. It's not made up and it's not your fault.

 No.5350

Today I got a surprise visit by some old school mates. I haven't seen two of them in a long time and really wanted to accept their invitation to a cozy local bar, but since I wasn't prepared in any way, I turned them down. To one of them I had regular contact in the last years. He knows about my condition. All I can hope for now, is him to lay in a word for me.

Would it be awkward to message them and explain things, so they don't get the wrong idea? How would you feel about someone, you haven't seen in years, first leaving you at the door and later texting you about mental bullshit out of all things?

 No.5351

File: 1545532474190.jpg (43.31 KB, 468x468, aWlPkDaX_700w_0.jpg)

>>5350
>Would it be awkward to message them and explain things, so they don't get the wrong idea? How would you feel about someone, you haven't seen in years, first leaving you at the door and later texting you about mental bullshit out of all things?
If you lay all your problems into long wall texts about your sufferings and such, that's bad.
But if you write something like:

"Sorry bud, I really appreciate the fact you guys invited me, even after all this time we haven't seen each other. But unfortunately I'm not ready yet for this. Hope you don't take it bad".

Or some such. That is, if he knows your condition, he'll probably understand you mean no ill. Otherwise change the "I'm not ready for this" for "I'm going through a shitty moment and didn't want to be a nuisance" or something like that.

 No.5352


 No.5437

vrchat helped me with my social anxiety



File: 1498956241829.jpg (107.07 KB, 1200x900, Anorexia.jpg)

 No.3313[Reply]

Does anyone here struggle with any eating disorders?

I have been extremely thin for most of my life, mostly because I regularly skip meals and don't work out.

Being very thin has hurt my self confidence. Also, the only physical activities I like to do are walking and biking, I think this might also make me thin.

Also, this thread can be about general physical help too.
24 posts and 10 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.4322

>>4321
Lived in poverty before. Was a healthy weight then by carefully calculating how spending money would maximize calories. Still spend money to maximize calories, but have never been a healthy weight since. (I'm overweight)

 No.4327

File: 1516292096631.jpg (Spoiler Image, 160.12 KB, 1200x1041, lowres.jpg)

I'm not sure if you can call it an ED but my doctor referred to it as such.

I have an incredible dislike of food (and eating too).
I hate the feeling of food on my tongue, I don't like taste either. I'm fine with crunchy stuff that barely tastes like anything, bread and fruits, vegetables and stuff, which sucks cause in Winter there are only disgusting fruits available from southern countries.
I can't stomach soup or any watery, wet stuff (sauce is sometimes alright if a little is put on a sandwich maybe but that's about it)

On some days I have to remind myself to eat. I'm underweight obviously.
People take it really badly if you don't eat in front of them. It might be a psychological factor from primitive times, sharing food so you know you can trust each other.

 No.4335

File: 1516329522688.jpg (655.29 KB, 670x800, amduscia.jpg)

>>4327
soylent.com
terrible name, but I've heard good things. It's a flexible meal replacement; provides calories and most of the necessary shit you can't get in a multivitamin.
>>4322
There wasn't any money to prioritize, madre held the purse strings and she was fucked in the head. I ate what I could get, when I could get it, and cleaned the plate with a vengeance. I dunno, maybe when things were good temporarily and I'd gorge myself I stretched out my stomach. Because I don't feel full until it hurts

Shit, it is so hard to unlearn the habits that kept you alive, even when they start being a problem. I feel for you, at least my problem doesn't entail much work

 No.5412

wasn't until last year that I had difficulties, before then I can't think of any issues arising from eating, even minor ones
but as of about summer 2018 I now can't eat more than a meal a day generally, sometimes 2, sometimes not even a proper meal and just a single slice of toast or something
was 35kg at my lowest, now I generally don't go below 45, and I do stay in the 45-55kg range but it fluctuates so much I think I should just get another set of scales to be 100% honest
it's not great but there's nothing anybody can do so I suppose that's a closed book

 No.5433

I binge/stress eat an alarming amount. Last I checked I was around 300 lbs at 5'0 (this was sometime either last year or the year before, I'm terrified of checking again). Doesn't really help that I live with a neglectful family that sabotages attempts to get my proverbial shit together (including but not limited to keeping the vegetables for themselves or cooking them to taste like garbage). With how little I go outside on top of several other problems I'm honestly terrified that I'm never going to be able to recover. I try to exorcise, but I feel more lethargic and drained of will than ever lately. Fasting helps, but I also don't want to go from one extreme to the other.

Plus, being a girl, the potential side effects of my polycystic ovarian syndrome are constantly looming over me. I feel like I'm in a deadlock and it fucking sucks.



File: 1545864908103.jpg (104.18 KB, 889x1130, ffae00f06c2674b02653110f8c….jpg)

 No.5353[Reply]

(I hope it's the right board.)

I think I've been followed/stalked for almost a year now. Possibly had one email hacked too, but I deleted immediately. I closed all my social media.

The problem is, I have absolutely no proof. No alerts, viruses or anything suspicious.

I know it's most likely a "problem" I invented myself but I have a few small reasons to believe it.

Did this happen to anyone else? Do you have any advice?
9 posts and 3 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.5365

>>5356
>If you're paranoid, backup some stuff, wipe your HDD and reinstall your OS
BIOS/UEFI rootkits can persist even across OS reinstallations
(however, they are very rare)

 No.5366

Check your router / gateway for suspicious and reoccuring connection attempts. You can also run a second machine with wireshark to monitor that.

 No.5367

>>5366
Ok, thanks. I already solved this.

 No.5431

what was that chatbro link

 No.5432

>>5431
www.niggers.com/1986



File: 1546888291347.png (446.71 KB, 999x1029, 1542250887423.png)

 No.5407[Reply]

Has anyone here ever been obsessed with someone for no reason at all? Not in a crush-esque kinda way, just platonic, if that.

For example, I saw someone a while back on a Discord server and they're probably the only person who shares the same interests on the server as I do. I can't get them out of my head and am constantly thinking about doing stuff together. I've got a circle of friends already, but I just feel some sort of a special connection (?) to them. Am I becoming a creep or something?
7 posts and 3 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.5422

File: 1547344023062.jpg (287.99 KB, 850x1154, __original_drawn_by_wenqin….jpg)

>>5421
Only schizos and manic depressives get my attention, and it's not because i'm worried e about them.

 No.5423

>>5420
This post scares me slightly, since I'm sure your description of him is how I'm perceived and because there are a couple of people who occasionally engage with me just like you described. I interpreted it as pity before, now I'm worried that I've got some kind of "mysteriousness" to them.

 No.5424

>>5423
In the past, I came across that way to some people. For most, it's more likely to be pity. Anon is just too used to stories about quiet people actually being something extraordinary.

 No.5428

>>5423
Yeah. I just have to say: I'm so sorry.

 No.5429

>>5428
Don't be, I'm sure >>5424 is right. I was just being dumb.



File: 1520307604918.jpg (62.49 KB, 447x686, 1514685331617.jpg)

 No.4545[Reply]

Anybody else here who used to frequent hikkichan?
It's closed now and I feel like I lost my home.
This is the only other place where I can maybe belong..
55 posts and 11 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.5328

>>5326
Yeah, only you have have gone through depression and extreme alienation from others. That's why you're incapable of moving ahead in life. It's because you're reaaaly the most miserable and oppressed. Give me a break, faggot.

 No.5329

File: 1544899348245.png (1022.05 KB, 1613x1406, gei.png)

>>5326
that's what hikkis think. when hikkis look down the abyss thinking they've experienced real misery the children in africa look back up at them from below.
leveraging loser dick size isn't a really healthy thing to do
>>5287 is right, a job is a superficial distinction, I could be flipping burgers any time now but I would still be in the same cultural boiling pot
on the other hand, pick an average person working at a fab and give them the pink slip. boom, they're fired. they're a NEET now because they're currently unemployed and they're not looking (let's just say they're getting things straight for the month) for a job
does that mean they're not a normalfag anymmore? even though they very likely still remain a normal ordinary responsible person and hold interests compatible with (the already loose) definition of normalfags

some people say ubuu is filled with normalfags, but you have to realize most people here are in their late 20s - mid 30s now, people got a job and moved on. we just don't glorify (not glorifying =/= hating) feels or NEETdom like some other boards
i miss /n/

 No.5360

Interestingly enough, the creator of the site has been found leaving a comment on this retrospective on the website. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aG8DplmUzAA&t=1s

 No.5414

>>5326
do not think sadness is a competition, very bad idea

 No.5415

File: 1547282589404.jpg (55.54 KB, 687x657, Kny-6a2Rekc.jpg)

>>5414
That's what I've been thinking… Furthermore, your 'level of sadness' don't really depend on how high your level of life is, how well you're being treated by other people, your social status etc. I mean miserable hikikkomori nobody cares about can be 100 times happier than rich daughter of some politician or something. I think it all depends on your personal view of life and other extremely subjective things.

With that said, how come person who works be less miserable than hikki? Can this person have social anxiety and depression too? Yes, of course he can, and he's forced to act like a productive member of society everyday. Isn't that sad? That's why sadness isn't a competition.

Everyone's sad in their own way and nobody can have a mental capacity to truly understand what other person feel and why is it that way. I think we should treat each other's sadness equally.



File: 1538057548271.jpg (5.92 KB, 183x275, images.jpg)

 No.5128[Reply]

So awhile back I found Infinite Outlaw's video being linked in an interesting links thread on 8chan /hikki/. Since then I've noticed he makes a lot of videos related to the topic and recently has been linking to threads of this board and sometimes using our posts in videos. His most recent video is just a compilation of posts in a thread on here over some music.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yy4CdqcHwQw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IeCSEeBlLhw
14 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.5401

>>5398
>He also did a video outright saying he's not trans on his second channel???


He never said he wasn't trans he said that he is fine being a guy and no longer identifies as a girl but the feelings aren't completely gone and that there could be a possibility of him relapsing so yes he is a tranny faggot.

 No.5402

>>5401
Well he hasn't relapsed and he seems to have actively trying to change himself. Unlike most of these trans SJWS you dont see them actually trying to change who they are. These are just feelings he had. You realize he was raped right? These feelings dont come out of no where. And it's been months since he made that video. It seems pretty set in stone to me. Either way feelings and thoughts are just that. It's how you act that matters dude. And as far as being trans goes, he doesn't seem to be pushy or act weird about it at all. If you watch his new live stream he actually shits on trans people for needing gender in the first place. That he thinks gender in it of itself is a weak thing to cling to. He seems pretty anti trans to me.

 No.5403

File: 1546211985759.png (72.3 KB, 478x187, unknown-14.png)

Oh Tatsuhiro Satou.

 No.5405

well he locked himself out his channel now.

 No.5406

>>5128
>>5405


>well he locked himself out his channel now.


Is he dead?



File: 1536791679709.jpg (100.83 KB, 500x281, Hikikomori-e-abbandono-sco….jpg)

 No.5085[Reply]

I'm going back to school in a few weeks after having been shut in my room for probably 5 years. I dropped out of high school a while back, and even before then my parents took me out of elementary school in favor of homeschooling, since then I've had trouble and barely kept up. I've taken online classes for most of it, but I'm being encouraged to go out and actually attend classes, most because I do want more opportunities out of the house, and my computer is busted.

I'll be taking a high school equivalency thing first before actual college, but the thing is, I have no idea what to expect. I haven't interacted with anyone my own age in real life since I started being homeschooled, so I have no social skills. Additionally, I lack confidence in my own skills and have always struggled. I slacked off a lot and now I'm so behind. I've been trying to study but I don't have experience with a lot of this. Nobody is really helping me, and I can't help but think that, since this is just high school, college will be harder and leave me more drained and depressed than ever before.

No one has even told me what to expect. It's like they just keep dancing around the issue whenever I ask how bad it will be, which isn't helping my anxiety. And I keep stressing out over how much this'll cut into my time and what to do with my life, and hours and weeks and homework and getting high grades. I don't want to just waste any of my time here, but I guess I have to do this if I want to be a functioning member of society and get money. But I just wish someone would help me.

Is it really as bad as I'm thinking? If So, how do I hold out these next few years wasting my life on things I won't ever need to really know without breaking down and killing myself?
5 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.5373

File: 1546064609883.jpg (196.09 KB, 850x1133, __deepa_mitra_new_horizon_….jpg)

>>5370
>computer science
Oof, have fun getting interviewed by Rahul. That field's been getting more fucked since y2k, anon.
source: my seasoned cousin who's in between jobs and does consultation calls to get by

 No.5375

>>5373
Anecdotal evidence. I know plenty of people who got good careers as software developers. Don't try to discourage people. I think this board should be about encouraging each other to do well, not telling people that they're going to fail.

 No.5380

>>5375
Anecdotal evidence has value when it comes from an insider. My cousin knows plenty of people in the same situation. Maybe software developers have it better for now than in banks and other type of firms that need an IT department. Companies are certainly looking into outsourcing development though, even if that's not widely implemented right now. I'm not sure how much upward mobility that has anyway. Unrealistic optimism isn't that useful either. I'll ask my cousin about developers.

 No.5394

>>5380
Yeah, he said software developers are also having a harder time, but the biggest issue is getting hired into a senior position. Indians work for less and companies are eager to abuse the work visa system. I don't know what your friends are doing or what their background is, but these problems certainly exist and are getting worse.

 No.5404

>>5370
>>5373
Only the low-tier companies outsource their work to India via HCL/infosys/etc. Most of this work is braindead enterprise CRUD stuff anyway. Startups and reputed firms that need quality devs usually shy away from outsourcing, though that doesn't mean they still don't abuse the visa system. Also most of the people in the field nowadays are asians, and the bar keeps getting higher as more as more people enter the field.

Computer Science is still a fun and practical degree though, and at least for the next ~5 years or so it won't be *impossible* to get a job. I'd suggest not specializing in machine learning though since that bubble is probably going to pop soon.



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