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/rec/ - Ex-NEET / Recovery

Board for recovering NEETs and Ex-NEETs who are trying to reintegrate.
Password (For file deletion.)

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Since it's sometimes difficult to have a conversation about trying to exit the NEET lifestyle in /hikki/ without it getting derailed, I have created this new board for such conversations.

If you are trying to go back to school or get a job, or if you've exited NEETdom a while ago but are still having problems, this is now the place to talk about it.

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Its a cloudy, dark gloomy day outside and if the lockdown had never happenned, if I had made another choice a year ago, I would be outside enjoying the sights and coming home from a boring day at work.

Instead I choose to earn a living by staring at a screen all day and typing non-sense only autists and computers can understand. I'm not even that good at it.

There is nothing stopping me from going out but I'm so unsightly, I'm not the person I was a year ago and I don't have anywhere to go anymore either.

I feel dread every time I hear the microsoft teams notification sound.

I'm becoming agoraphobic again, how is this any different from being a NEET?

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technically not a NEET now, but has been one on/off ever since i was 18. I have many things to say, ill just condense everything here.
so, it feels like i have accomplished nothing, other then start my GED, no job yet, no funds saved and getting one would be very overwhelming and the previous job i had at a store was horrible.

do you know any good jobs for a sperg recluse? I was thinking videogame QA, agoraphobia limits my choice in employment aswell.

also, i feel like i wasted all my free time doing nothing, and not even having much fun, just on youtube, discord and videogames mindlessly watching, playing and talking to people on discord but that ends up making me feel alienated since i dont feel i can be genuine, theres no place where i can say whats on my mind and just have an honest conversation, im re-discovering image boards again, this place seems like gold, sad that im only discovering good things such as yume nikki and uboachan when i was post NEET. As another anon posted, im thinking of looking into IRC/fediverse aswell to discover small comfy internet bunkers.

i wish i would have done things differently and discovered things earlier, too bad i cant get nostalgic about these things now, oh well.

unrelated but, im thinking of making a yume nikki inspired game, i dont want to be the "ideas guy" anymore, and i want to finally create SOMETHING in my life, i dont want to be lazy and passive no longer, im not motivated by fame, or money, just a drive to create and my imagination. Im not going to quit when i come across a obstacle. I have no skills, but i will MAKE skills if i have to!

this probably sounds like a autistic ramble, it probably is.


Good luck


If you're a big guy try security
Being a guard is a boring ass job but it pays decent


Not op here, but ive considered doing security but im not big.
>I don't want to be an idea guy
Can I be?


I've definitely seen smaller guys doing security at places. It's less common but it happens. Just get your guard card and certifications, and then join a security company and they will assign you somewhere.

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there's this girl I'm seeing that's 10 years older than me. she's the first girl I've made out and fondled with. she's alright, and I like her, but (I suppose this comes with our rather significant age difference) she's too forward and horny all the time and it makes me feel uncomfortable. I ain't even ready to have sex yet

where and how can I meet girls *my* age (this is what I'd wager marked our differences) that are reserved, quiet and introverted like me? I'm into manga, videogames and writing, not sure if it matters

I don't even know how to deal with women. getting a chance with this girl was mostly pure luck. we hardly knew each other, flirted a little bit on social media and then we met up and stuff. since it's not going as smoothly as I expect, I think trying other methods would be a good idea
some friends suggested clubbing after this whole pandemic crap ends, but it's not really my scene
5 posts omitted. Click reply to view.


Not everyone has the sex drive of a 16 year old.


I still do


Have you tried talk to her about it? That's how fully capable adults work out relationships I'm told. I wouldn't know myself but it looks like it works, like, 50% of the time.


agree with you anon. if op is being really romantic with her already he should probably just tell her (gently) that he'd like to wait a little bit. good luck op


I lost my virginity to a women in her early-mid 30s when I was 21. Would not recommend, wish I had waited a year until I found my current partner who is also in her early 20s and who I actually love. This said, if it happens it's not the end of the world. Intimacy with someone you really love will always be on another level than any mere infatuation.

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just when I was turning my life around a global pandemic hits
how are you living through the covid madness, bros? I still gotta commute to work lmao
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I'm a non-hikki NEET and I hate being quarantined for weeks at a time. I don't even want to fucking interact with people, I just wanna go outside and not have to spend all my time inside four walls.


If you live in the United Kingdom and you're unemployed, you can have the government pay your rent and be left with £400 a month in unemployment benefits to live on afterwards. That's $588 a month in american money.

It's not a lot of money, the money sucks, but there's over 200 countries in the world and in most of them you'd starve to death.

Over here the government forced businesses to close, so with landlords still demanding rent from those businesses, lots of companies are struggling to survive. I like to call it the Job Destruction Scheme.


i did not know that, it sounds too good to be true. even if i needed it, and i probably will some day, i'd feel guilty or ashamed asking for free money for no outwardly obvious reason other than being a softheaded hikkineet


Is this only true during covid or has it always been like that? Are there conditions like "you have to prove you're trying to get a job"?


I'm assuming they're talking about the typical benefit most countries have where yes "you have to prove you're trying to get a job". However, many countries have made the application process much easier and they're a bit slacker/more lenient now. For example here around Oceania, they made it much easier to apply, now you can do it all online and simply submit screenshots of your required documents and never have to go into their offices. Before covid you had to go in and attend a seminar and give them all this paperwork, talk to people yadda yadda, you have to keep going back for workshops to make yourself more employable etc none of that shit now lol. I've been collecting for a couple months now (and I just reached the age threshold where I get paid out a bit more, yay) and I've not had contact from anyone haha, tho I'm not sure what I'll do when they finally ask me how my applications have been going… ideally you should just be putting in the odd token application while being sure to come across as a terrible employee. It's hard enough to get a job when you really try so you don't have to do too much, some spelling mistakes, poor formatting etc. worst case they'll just warn you you aren't applying for enough.

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I just had a panic attack while attending an employment training course. I've had them before but this was the worst one yet, I feel like such a failure when everyone else there is perfectly fine with the tasks, and I'm not. Anyone else have experience with them? Have you been able to overcome them?


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I remember having panic attacks when I was in school during those on the job training periods. I ran to hide in the toilets for hours. To combat this I wore earmuffs and closed myself in my thoughts. If you don't want to look like a retard like me you could instead just wear headphones and listen to some music to drive the same purpose. Though these measures didn't really help me that much so what do I know I'm unfit for work anyway. Sorry for retard text. Hopefully you can understand ._.


Panic attacks sucks but a good way to calm down yourself is drinking water and breathe correctly, also the lack of sleep can makes you feel like shit, everything is mental so care about your mind :)


first things you should remember. breathing, steady it, focus on a rhythm. remember what time it is, look at your surroundings how to figure that out. feel the surfaces around you. focus on the present state, and try and bring yourself down to earth. remember a phrase that becomes a mindset. "this too will pass"

i have panic attacks all the time, i just became more aware i've been having them. if you often have anxiety attacks on a very reoccuring basis you may need a synapic damper to help. it doesnt make you feel much better, just can lessen the onset.

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I am looking for my Canadian friend. He went offline almost exactly this time 3 years ago.

His name is 0x39. Other names he went by were Nick and turbotard and 疑惑 and lots of other kanji names that I can't remember.
He was very nice to me and was aspiring to be tea otaku. He sometimes posted on Lainchan a long time ago (maybe 5+ years ago?). He was studying computer science back in 2018. One time he went to a maid cafe in Japan.

Do you know my friend? How can I reach him?
I just want to find my friend again. I miss him very much. Please let me know if you know him, my email is in the email field!

The next bit is for 0x39 if he's reading this. It's top sekrit private!! So please don't open spoiler unless you're the real 0x39!!!!
Hi, I know I'm doxing you a bit, I'm really sorry. I'm just trying to find you, but I know maybe you don't want to be found. I'm so sorry for intruding. You disappeared at the end of April 2018, I never got to be a better friend to you. We only talked for a little bit. I knew you were going soon, you said you were troubled by things. I wanted so much to hold onto you tighter, but I didn't want to smother you. You slipped away. You said you might make a new steam profile one day, but I don't think that day has come yet. You were a nice person and I wished I could've helped you more when you needed a friend the most. But I got there too late. It was already time for you to go. It's always like that for me: late to every party. I remember, I told you that you should always try to say a proper goodbye to your friends, just so they know for sure. And the last thing you gave to me was just a little "so…bye I guess". I always felt that it didn't count, not when you'd left so much unfinished, friend.

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Post here whenever you make a good step. Today I talked to some old friends from school, one hour either side of pressing send was absolute hell but everything after that was almost hilariously easy and I had a good time.
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I'm still (nominally) trying to get my license and I'm 28! I got a permit to learn, but I can only learn with someone else in the car and it's too scary and my mum's car is too big and scary for me to learn/drive in.
I hope you did your best anyway!


Well, turns out the whole thing is a bit rigged in my country. Basically, you have to pass a test about driving theory and one about driving practice. To prepare for the test you must purchase classes, each class allows you to drive with a teacher for 45 minutes. Turns out the driving school has to milk a certain amount of money out of you or you won't pass the test. And at almost 1000€ spent (ran out of money) it wasn't enough for them so I tried two times to pass the actual test and no dice, the teachers are buddies with the people who test you (won't even try to hide it, the last time I overheard them talking about going to drink a few beers after they were done with me) and if you haven't paid enough you fail the exam because they already know how to "make you" fail. Amazing that this thing happens in an actual European country in 2021. So I still can't drive because I don't have money to pay the corruption tax…

On the bright side, I did complete my security guard training and I could potentially get a job soon. I don't think much will change, I'm already 27 and have lived like this my whole life, I don't even want to put effort to make friends or things like that. I've gotten to a point where I actively avoid it, it's like interacting with people more than necessary is a hassle for me. I just talk with some close friends and that's it. I have nothing in common with normies, what would be the point of becoming anything else than circumstantial acquaintances with them? I don't even know how people have the energy to make a worthwhile friendship with more than 1 or 2 friends. This is like that thing that happens to people who've been in jail for too long, they just stop considering any other lifestyle and go back to jail on purpose.


What do you feel that you could teach a normie, if anything?


I've successfully completed four weeks of uni. My other attempts over the past few years have barely lasted a week. A couple of people have spoken to me and I've tried talking to them but I feel like they'll eventually work out how defective I am and stop trying soon enough. One already has but the other one still says hi to me when we walk past each other.
Good work mate. I'm 27 and only have my learner's licence. We're also the personality type.
Good work on getting the debit card and also doing it on your own. I understand how doing that sort of stuff by yourself can be difficult.


What do you mean?

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I was meditating upon the subject for a while and this is the conclusion I have to come to "to wish to live you must wish to die" wishing to live in the sense of "really living" you can't keep running and be safe in your castle, it's a rather colourless way to live one with no variations, very grey.

I mean 2 different things when I say "live and alive, "to "wish to live" you must "wish to die" that is to say wish to encounter your worst fear or whatever you have ran away from to hide in your castle, it's the only way to get colour, to embrace life you must embrace death, I do not mean this in a literal sense I mean life as in the positive aspects and death as in the hurdles and fears, one cannot exist without the other, you guys probably know all this stuff already though being able to identify if something is optimal doesn't mean you are incentivised or willing to enact it.

it seems there are 2 choices to continue this grey lifestyle or to try and do something.

this post probably sounds severely schizophrenic and I doubt I was able to get my point across, all of this was inspired by a chat with a former hikkineet I had, I will keep you lads in my prayers.


I understand what you mean OP and would like to point out that you can paint this grey to whatever you want and however you want.
You can even do it from home, while still being a hikki neet. It only depends on what you do, how often you do it and how much you invest into it. You could even work from home. Well I hope to read future updates on your doing and thank you for your prayers, I have some use for them currently.


Nothing wrong with schizophrenia tbh.


i agree to an extent but the good has to outweigh the bad to be worth it, some of us are hikkis because before the hikki life there was too much bad and absolutely nothing good


>the good has to outweigh the bad to be worth it
Not op but I don't agree. If I were given the choice between a life of 3/4 bad + 1/4 good and a life completely neutral I would take the first easily.



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i have been a NEET for most of the last decade, apart from a seasonal part-time job some years ago which i quit after a few months. i recently was hired full-time for a mostly WFH office job. how can i cope with suddenly having to work for eight hours a day? i can't relax because i know i'm just going to have to do it again tomorrow. i feel like i have no free time any more. what are some strategies i can use to avoid suicide? i miss those carefree days already…


Quit if you can't handle it


Congrats on getting a job anon!
I’m thinking that maybe some clear distinction between work and home (like dedicating a room/ some space to work and only work) could help, as it get you into the work mindset and also gives a reason to get though the work day (to come back into comfy hole at the end of it). Also remind yourself the that you are now capable of finacially independance (or kind of is) thanks to your job by saving up and treating yourself sometimes sounds like a good idea as well.

t. An useless, jobless uni student


i'm having a really difficult time coping with this. last night i fell asleep in my chair for an hour after work, and when i woke up i was so angry that i had lost an hour of my now-precious free time i wanted to scream. i can't actually fully relax after work, knowing i have another eight hours of it tomorrow, so my week feels like one long slog where there's no real delineation between days. i can't stop thinking about how much i hate this, i hate having to work, i hate work, i hate that i'm being forced to do this, i hate that i'm forced to interact with people, i hate having to learn all this shit i don't care about, i hate hate hate hate every single part of this. i'm terrified that this is just the start of some slow lobotomy and soon i won't even have the energy to hate it, that i'll end up resigning myself to having the majority of my time and energy stolen from me and spend the next 40 years toiling away like this. i can't see full-time employment as being part of a life worth living for me.
i want to at least tough it out until i can move out or something, but whenever i think about "just a few more months" the fear that i might be saying that for the rest of my life comes back. and then, once i've already moved out, won't i be stuck here even further, unable to quit or i'll lose my home? is there a way to live without working? can i just buy a trailer somewhere and live off of savings forever?
i don't know what to do. this is unbearable, the alternatives are unbearable, i can't imagine a future that is bearable.


we're in the same boat. but i encourage myself with little tidbits of silent comfort. i hope they are useful to you:

being optimistic (its kinda hard tbh), my job helped me organize my life better and be more active. it sorta forced me to use my spare time to do shit i actually wanted to do or better myself instead of just mindlessly wasting time using my computer. and coming home tired af made me forget how dark was that void of watching the days passing me by while i waited to wither away into oblivion
now my time is valuable. for me and others

and my hard work will hopefully be a stern lesson to my future self:
-some people do this and more simply to survive
-my comfy newly acquired job is a stroll in the park compared to what i could be doing
-you *were* able to work like an ox, and you took it like a man

by the way, and please dont take this the wrong way, you would miss your job at the office if you were an ironworker like me. and i say this because i had an office job before

best of luck, and keep on keeping on


Steal office supplies, fuck around on your computer, take a lot of bathroom breaks. Alternatively, >>200.

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