Someone who puts as much effort into my life as I put into theirs.
e.g. I will offer to help someone move, then when I need to move, he offers without me asking.
Or, say I bring food into work one week for everyone. Then again in another month. Then a coworker asks when the next time food is coming in, instead of bringing some in himself. It shows self-centeredness, which is not a quality of a good
That's the real difference - most people will do something if you ask them to because they are taught to help people/be nice, etc. However, that is the only
reason many people do those things. When they do those things without
prompting and not just because they want to avoid saying "no" to somebody who is asking for help, I consider them actual friends.