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File: 1539907281260.png (26.67 KB, 825x459, subete.png)

 No.19555[Reply]

So let's continue with Subetenosei's bull
So everything started with this 全てあなたの所為です。 we found their videos named . .. and such, then we found 全ての所為です。 (aka, subetenosei on twitter), which they have like, 5 videos in reference at the first guy, some weaks later they deleted their videos and uploaded other ones that were kinda weird
Some japanese guys we found on this speculate that this is koronba or somebody who is really familiar with his work, also we have almost all of their videos saved (we are only missing three at the moment, now we are really carefull with everything they upload)
全てあなたの所為です。 videos are this:
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Ray9iBnP0w
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BYJEXJlHz4U
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7CUpc5K1li4
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nNeOqvtS39c

Subetenosei videos (that are not deleted/on private at the moment i'm posting this)
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-586n9IG7E
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0wzdOSo0mI
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sKhiVfz934w
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z9mxBfbvopU

Post too long. Click here to view the full text.
4 posts and 3 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.19629

File: 1543925494909.gif (Spoiler Image, 132.81 KB, 300x250, 300_250.gif)

What is this and why do i like it?

 No.19630

File: 1543956890567.jpg (4.67 KB, 360x270, smile.jpg)

>>19629
nice picrelated
Just some Japanese dude messing up with music and different encryption methods. He uses a lot of different codes in his works like Morse code (Wabun code, to be exact) and broken character text and more we don't know yet. There is actually a lot to discuss about "who is he?" but it's better to just enjoy watching what he does without digging more into his personal information. For now we post news about this channel/person/art project(?) in this thread and try translating some things in English.
Although it would've be fun if we started trying to decode something as well I hope author don't mind. I think maybe this subetenosei thing can be counted as some kind of ARG in a way.

>>>/fg/13635
All discussions about him started from this post in Koronba's thread. If you interested, you can read posts from that thread.

This is so mysterious yet I've started loving his works as well. There is something unique and charming in this… I don't know.

 No.19631

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=34FeXjfaxQQ
"The Announcement"

"Thank you for visiting my channel today.

This channel's followers number reached 500
I'm extremely happy and about this
And in honor of this event I'm planning to do a remake of my old work.

Because I post premieres irregularly
Please wait for next notification."

おめでとうございます深海さん

 No.19637

File: 1544130826647-0.png (564.08 KB, 1280x720, vlcsnap-2018-12-06-22h59m3….png)

File: 1544130826647-1.png (32.94 KB, 1280x720, vlcsnap-2018-12-06-23h02m3….png)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9SQ5mapZ9Sg
{new video}

I'm too dumb to decode text in this video. It's too glitched out, even going frame by frame won't help. 助けて!

 No.19649

File: 1544563950690-0.png (91.55 KB, 1280x720, vlcsnap-2018-12-11-22h37m1….png)

File: 1544563950691-1.jpg (15.13 KB, 1032x277, WHCk4Q0o_II.jpg)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXstoFzIHDc
Here comes new video.
Well the song isn't new at all but… we have some new juicy details on our hands

First of all, that's what I've heard from the beginning part (feel free to prove me):
この動画の削除した為が出来ません
また(お一人います?)
This is a grammar mess, but this can be interpreted as
"There is nothing I can do to delete this video
(I am alone) again"
I doubt the second part especially but I can't find any other logical explanation

Ending message (finally something new):
あなたは悩み事を抱えている為。
あなたの所為ではないなら、
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.



File: 1544366731083.jpg (181.81 KB, 850x903, __original_drawn_by_taosym….jpg)

 No.19641[Reply]

I watched Roma yesterday because I wanted to expand my perspective and try new things. I wanted to go far out of my comfort zone. It sucked. A pretentious bore. I understood what is was trying to go for, I understood the symbolism and what the obscure details meant. I still hated it. Why? I didn't connect with the characters. They were all unlikable or boring, blank skates. Whatever empathy I felt for the mc, Cleo, is the same amount I would have for a stanger. I don't get to know anybody. None of the characters truly develop either. The way they act at the beginning and what you can imagine them doing, remains entirely the same at the end. The mother does become more self-assured after she has to become a career woman, but this might only be visible because of the actress. It wasn't coveyed particularly well by the writing and plot. Cleo just felt like an alien to me. She was quiet, dumb and naive. At the end, she was a bit less naive. This again, was not coveyed through much action. She has one line of dialogue that indicates this. The revolution backdrop of the movie feels totally separate from the main plot and I didn't have the background knowledge to understand why it was happening. The film gives no insight into this.

The film seemed to me like a propaganda piece made to give a human face to Mexicans and get me to sympathize with them more. I'm not deliriously cynical enough to completely believe this was for political reasons, but I wouldn't be suprised. It failed. It has two hours to accomplish the bare requirement for a compelling story and it failed. I didn't even learn anything new. It was like a late night soap operaish flick with a few extra embellishments like class struggle. Nothing new or suprising. It seems like a movie made by Mexicans for Mexicans. How it got so much praise is a mystery to me.

 No.19642

For a moment I thought it was actually about rome and didn't understand why anything had to do with mexicans.

Anyway, checking wikipedia
>On review aggregator Rotten Tomatoes, Roma holds an approval rating of 98% based on 191 reviews, with an average rating of 9.3/10. The website's critical consensus reads, "Roma finds writer-director Alfonso Cuarón in complete, enthralling command of his visual craft – and telling the most powerfully personal story of his career." On Metacritic the film has a weighted average score of 96 out of 100, based on 47 critics, indicating "universal acclaim".
>At the Toronto International Film Festival, the film was named second runner-up for the People's Choice Award. The film also won the Golden Lion at the Venice International Film Festival.

If what you say is true, then I'm really disappointed people claim it to be such a masterwork if there isn't even any character development or story to drive your interest in the film. Maybe I should watch it to judge it better, but it doesn't seem that appealing to me.

 No.19643

>>19642
If you've got two hours to spare, please do. As I was walking out of the theatre, it seemed like everybody had a negative opinion on it. Admittedly, most of the people in that small theatre were old and white. They complained about it being boring or too depressing. I love depressing stuff that's well executed, so I knew that wasn't the issue. The movie certainly has, "layers", here and there, especially with the Fernand/Fermind character, but a smattering of themes and symbolism does not a good movie make. Ultimately nothing significant changes, certainly not anything the audience is made to care about. Bit of easy, "emotional torture porn", here and there to try to wring out pity for a character we barely know.

 No.19644

File: 1544391351660.jpg (168.37 KB, 850x577, __armin_arlert_eren_yeager….jpg)

>>19643
Also, if I had to compliment the movie on anything, it would be the cinematography. Lots of well done long takes and some good blocking. The Black and White effect was totally unnecessary and added nothing. The contrast between the silly tv shows and dloo,y, "reality", of the movie was a nice touch, but it just made me want to watch those shows instead. It doesn't actually make any kind of relevant statement to the rest of the film.



File: 1544343245455.jpg (501.41 KB, 1200x385, 23423.jpg)

 No.19639[Reply]

Most people have a particular transformation fetish. I don't desire to apply makeup as a girl, or to be treated like one by society. I like being the guy in my current relationship, and asking my girl about how her body feels to know how she feels.

But I'm still a switch, and when I read erotica I can insert as the dom who takes advantage of a confused ex-man, or as the sub with new body parts. Transformation and intercourse get me off, but not the trans lifestyle.

 No.19640

File: 1544365013676.jpg (257.89 KB, 850x1314, __terry_bogard_snk_heroine….jpg)

M,kay anon. Just stop using deviantart and it'll pass. This is a fetish that's totally disconnected from reality. It's like body horror mixed with rape and bdsm. I understand wher you're coming from, but this seems like a gateway fetish to stuff like inflation and animal transformation. Just try to jerk off to some normal rape and bdsm stuff. I'll even look at a sexswap doujin once in a blue moon, but I don't dwell on it or give it a super specific name like you. There's no term for magic sex switch or science sex switch for a reason. Do you have any hobbies?



File: 1542860587112.jpg (227.82 KB, 850x1700, __saya_saya_no_uta_drawn_b….jpg)

 No.19601[Reply]

Sometimes I'm weirded out by how starkly contrasting situations and emotional states are in people's lives. Me during a depressive state seems like such a different person for when i'm healthy and socially active, but it's really just the same person. A person at their most pathetic and weak moment is just so different from them at their best. Even a ceo was shitting in their diapers at one point in life. One night, i'm browsing guro for fun, the next morning, I have a nice chat with an old guy. What if he knew? He thinks i'm a nice, young man, but am I really?

If something like gollum or a xenomorph somehow gradually changed into a beautiful girl, would you want a relationship with them, or would the thought of what they once were be too off-putting?

 No.19602

File: 1543004489408.jpg (201.11 KB, 1280x1009, emotional spectrum.jpg)

It makes me sad knowing that, while humans can be such wonderful and complex creatures, thanks to my lack of communication skills and my general off-putting demeanor, I'll never be able to see more than their most shallow surface.
Well, no one truly will til the point when we invent mind reading devices, and most probably don't want to, either - that'd entail being exposed to plenty of unpleasant experiences. Not that realistic close relationships don't entail that, since one of the prerequisites, or maybe tests of a true bond is going through hardships together. But no one will most likely let me get even to that point.

On the topic of unpleasant human states of mind, though this isn't really a direct response to your post, on a conscious level I don't agree with the "demonization" of certain feelings or behaviours. In my opinion even some seemingly negative personality traits have merit to them, if only by making a person interesting. Being prone to "ugly" emotions like jealousy, fear, anger etc. isn't practical in daily life, true, but such traits don't exist in a vacuum, they're part of a complex picture that makes a person, with parts sometimes starkly contrasting one another, like you've said, and prone to change with experience. I remember being asked what my opinion was of an acquaintance, and getting a surprised and sort of disbelieving response when I said he "seemed sort of arrogant/smug, but clearly smart and cool." So apparently you can't have a positive opinion of a person if you think they're smug at the same time. Yet if he's arrogant, that means that he underestimates certain people, but then the things/people that he DOES value might have more worth than they do to regular people. What makes these things so valuable in his eyes? And what brought him to think this way? What kind of personal experiences has he had? Aren't these things interesting to think about?
A person at their lowest, one that's hysterically sobbing on the floor or locked up in a musty, dark room is interesting in a similar way, and makes me think 'what if I could help them out of their misery?', 'I wonder what they'd look like if i could get them to smile honestly at least once', 'what does a happy person look like after they've gone through this?' Basically, ugly things give more value to pleasant ones. And yet while I say all this, if someone is unpleasant directly to me or someone that I'm close to, intentionally or not, I usually get frustrated pretPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

 No.19603

File: 1543009018083.jpg (12.74 KB, 528x480, __facehugger_and_xenomorph….jpg)

>>19602
This is an interesting take on people, but i'm not really sure if the majority are actually messed up in any interesting way. Whenever I'm talking to people and being social, it's sort of like being another person. Even the way I think seems different when i'm in this mode. At first, this side of me was like a mask or facade, but as I got more comfortable slipping into this role, it somehow felt more real. To go with the eb and flow of conversation, to pick up on all the little things a person communicates, to cycle through the options of what you could say and eliminating anything inappropriate, this is stuff that some people don't even have to think about.

Maybe some people are perpetually in this mode unless forced out of it? It's like a default. I always like to sort of play dumb to lull people into a sense of security and reveal more to me than if I seemed opinionated myself. I like to get as good of a sense of people as I can. I just don't know if everybody is so complex. Even when I pick up on their insecurities or their little habits, I'm not sure how aware they are of themselves. Some people, especially kids, just feel like models in a production line.

Maybe there's just some irredeemable mental lines you can't cross that I've alreasy violated.
As for your question, it would depend on the feeling that person gave me. Maybe I would stay apprehensive, but I don't know.

 No.19635

I don’t believe personalities are the constant, inflexible shell that it seems to me most people accept it to be. What I’ve studied from sociology, animal rehabilitation, and even just from writing, just doesn’t allow me to see people that way.

The mind for me is possibly the most flexible, unstable, moldable muscle in the body. I believe what we perceive as “personality” is only a combination of cognition and reactions, that manifest our basic but amazingly complex animal adaptative skills, that we inherit genetically or developed through our lives. Very little traits of the personality are tightly rooted.

The contrast you describe I find it natural. Everybody is very unstable, is what allowed us to evolve so well as we did against our challenges. Our adaptative skills react to the world, to other humans, to circumstances, to hormones, to body sensations, to thoughts, to whatever synapses activate in our brain, to so many things. With so many stimuli influencing us, it must be difficult to stay immune to all. Having an inflexible personality might even be harder, everything may feel more challenging than necessary because you’re bad at adapting.

So everybody is constantly changing, some less and others more, some to better and other for worst. If your personality stopped adapting, if there weren’t any stimuli to read or react to, would you cease to exist? Would you become your real true self without outside and inside influence, or become an empty, unresponsive shell?

You can control this change, and cultivate or trim it as to guide it to your liking or your needs. It is a matter of how well you can manipulate yourself, your adaptability, and how much conscious you are to the stimuli.

I knew some terms for some of these things, but my memory for this kind of things is horrible.

I like xenomorphs, and if one became a cute monster boy that would be a dream come true. This aside, it would depend on a lot of variables.
Sorry for any awkward English or if I’m being out of context. It’s not my first language so some things are still a bit difficult to grasp.

 No.19636

File: 1544060830422.jpg (428.93 KB, 850x1196, __ookawa_shuumei_and_toujo….jpg)

>>19635
Just today I read an article about this sort of thing. As per usual, regardless of science and what's actually reality, society won't change the way it works. If a person murders your family, you're not going to forgive them because their current personality technically isn't the same one as when they killed them. That's an extreme example, but the same principle applies to most people. There's certain things they find irredeemable. When they meet a person they like, they just assume they haven't crossed that line in their head. Even I do that, so I guess it's another inherent part of people.



File: 1544027047520.jpg (87.61 KB, 960x720, 1543219405274.jpg)

 No.19632[Reply]

I'm almost 30 and work an 8 to 5 job from Monday to Friday. Every night before I sleep I keep hoping that I never wake up. I have little attachments to this world. I'm just ranting since this is the /ot/ board. I used to post here before as a neet, now I'm posting as someone with responsibilities in society.

I just hope that this night will be the last.

 No.19633

File: 1544040496960.jpg (98.74 KB, 566x799, __inubashiri_momiji_and_na….jpg)

What's work like?

 No.19634

File: 1544041396861.jpg (31.01 KB, 400x400, 71831932_p0_master1200.jpg)

Why won't you work in a field you like instead?

There is a lot of alternatives when it comes to work, especially if having not-so-high-but-enough-to-live-with salary doesn't matter to you much. You can try yourself as a freelancer, you can go to the courses for a thing you're interested in (with the money you've saved from this work you do now. there are a lot of courses that give you work in the field once you've finished), you can find work where you do nothing, you can find a work where you have to travel a lot if you're into that kind of thing (you can became a stuart and fly to the different countries for example) etc.

Maybe you're not happy with the lifestyle this work forces you to have.

 No.19638

>me in less than 10 years



File: 1543196999598.png (1.21 MB, 1006x1200, commission__liru_by_gawkin….png)

 No.19621[Reply]

Liru is a miracle of the universe.

 No.19622

File: 1543235844299.jpg (148.11 KB, 850x1564, __grey_wolf_kemono_friends….jpg)

Get a new waifu, anon.

 No.19623

people died of cancer waiting for her to come home…miracle of the devil



File: 1529119297150.png (106.86 KB, 2330x1024, oo.png)

 No.19030[Reply]

How has your personality changed over time? A couple of years ago, I took what was probably the most accurate personality test I ever came across. Today I found the same test and the results were a bit worrying.
http://www.seemypersonality.com/#q1
First, here's my first report.
>Your Personality Type is The Artisan (RICGS) Artisans are emotionally reactive, which means that they experience their emotions strongly and can be very passionate., however also have a higher tendency to experience emotions such as anxiety, anger and depression. Due to their independence and reserve, sometimes the Artisan can be perceived as arrogant or unfriendly, however this is merely because they don't require the same level of social stimulation or interaction that others may seek. The Artisan generally prefers fact over fiction and security and stability over ambiguity and disorder. Sticking with convention and familiar routines is generally best. With a healthy skepticism of the motives of others, and a belief in justice and being self made, sometimes the Artisan can come across as guarded or intimidating. However the Artisan has a refreshing impulsiveness about them, they tend to dislike too many rules and regulations and can be casual and whimsical.
>You often resist any cravings or urges that you have, but sometimes you give in, however you experience panic, confusion, and helplessness when under pressure or stress. You tend not to talk much and prefer to let others control the activities of groups. You prefer dealing with either people or things rather than ideas. You regard intellectual exercises as a waste of your time. You are willing to take credit for good things that you do but you don't often talk yourself up much, however you believe that a certain amount of deception in social relationships is necessary. You are guarded in new relationships and less willing to openly reveal the whole truth about yourself.
>You are a reasonably organized person and like to have a certain amount of routine in your life.
>You are generally calm, although some situations can make you feel anxious or tense. You do not usually get angry too easily but some things can annoy you. Mostly your emotions are on an even keel and you do not get depressed easily. You are not genPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

 No.19031

File: 1529119954653.png (132.16 KB, 2466x1138, o1.png)

>You mostly assume that people are honest and fair, however you are wary and hold back from trusting people completely. You believe that a certain amount of deception in social relationships is necessary. You are guarded in new relationships and less willing to openly reveal the whole truth about yourself. You do not particularly like helping other people. Requests for help feel like an imposition on your time. You are not adverse to confrontation and will sometimes even intimidate others to get your own way. You are not affected strongly by human suffering, priding yourself on making objective judgements based on reason. You are more concerned with truth and impartial justice than with mercy.
>Often you do not feel effective, and may have a sense that you are not in control of your life. You are a reasonably organized person and like to have a certain amount of routine in your life. You find contracts, rules, and regulations overly confining and are sometimes seen as unreliable or even irresponsible by others. You are content to get by with a minimal amount of work, and might be seen by others as lazy. You have a reasonable amount of will-power and are able to follow through on tasks that you feel you need to complete. You can be distracted however and have been known to procrastinate. You are not an overly cautious person. You will think about alternatives and consequences but make up your mind fairly quickly.
Here's the more recent report.
>Your Personality Type is The Designer (RIOGS) Designers are emotionally reactive, which means that they experience their emotions strongly and can be very passionate., however also have a higher tendency to experience emotions such as anxiety, anger and depression. Due to their independence and reserve, sometimes the Designer can be perceived as arrogant or unfriendly, however this is merely because they don't require the same level of social stimulation or interaction that others may seek. The Designer enjoys a good balance between the real world and fantasy, they are mostly aware of and in touch with their emotions. Being open-minded to new and unusual ideas helps them to interact with the world. With a healthy skepticism of the motives of others, and a belief in justice and being self made, sometimes the Designer can come across as guarded or intimidating. However the Designer has a refreshing impulsiveness about them, tPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

 No.19032

>Often you find the real world is too plain and ordinary for your liking, and you use fantasy as a way of creating a richer, more interesting world for yourself. You are reasonably interested in the arts but are not totally absorbed by them. Generally you are not considered to be an emotional person, however you are aware of and in touch with your emotions. You can tend to feel uncomfortable with change. As a person who is open-minded to new and unusual ideas, you love to play with and think about ideas. You also like to debate intellectual issues and often enjoy riddles, puzzles and brain teasers. Often you exhibit a readiness to challenge authority, convention, and traditional values. Sometimes you feel a certain degree of hostility toward rules and perhaps even enjoy ambiguity.
>You generally see others as selfish, devious, and sometimes potentially dangerous. You believe that a certain amount of deception in social relationships is necessary. You are guarded in new relationships and less willing to openly reveal the whole truth about yourself. You do not particularly like helping other people. Requests for help feel like an imposition on your time. You do not enjoy confrontation, but you will stand up for yourself or push your point if you feel it is important. You feel superior to those around you and sometimes tend to be seen as arrogant by other people. You are not affected strongly by human suffering, priding yourself on making objective judgments based on reason. You are more concerned with truth and impartial justice than with mercy.
This is pretty strange because I've actually become much better at talking to others and getting work done diligently. I also have a way thicker skin. Maybe I've become more honest with myself? Either that or I'm going crazy and getting better at hiding it.

 No.19035


 No.19599

File: 1542608861614.png (108.46 KB, 2424x1104, personality 3.png)

I took the test again. Apparently i'm less moral and driven to do work, but more social and open-minded. I don't know how much this is affected by self-perception.



File: 1539542969073.jpg (701.69 KB, 750x750, __original_drawn_by_wenqin….jpg)

 No.19518[Reply]

It's halloween season again.
When I was a kid I used to scour around my school for a pumpkin a couple days before the 31st. Then i'd come up with some kind of plan and steal it without anybody noticing. After i'd carve a pattern in it at home and stick a candle inside. Didn't even put it outside. I just kept it in my kitchen and checked on it all the way through the night until it flickered out finally. Now a days I just buy one. What kind of tradtions do you have?

Also, this year i'm looking for a physiological horror movie to watch instead. I'm hopng people here can suggest something that's not entry level like The Shining.
13 posts and 10 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.19566

File: 1541027421491.png (122.23 KB, 477x404, __madotsuki_yume_nikki_dra….png)

Op here. I decided on watching Akira since I never got around to it before and it seems close enough to horror. Happy Halloween.

 No.19567

My neighborhood is always totally deserted outside. It's like a ghost town compared to developments. I don't think even one person took from the basket I put outside…

 No.19568

File: 1541051962151.jpg (102.2 KB, 800x796, __kaneda_shoutarou_akira_d….jpg)

>>19566
I finished it. Akira might be the best action film ever made. I'd say its sort of like The Matrix, in that its very high-concept, except its better in every way. It's action and visuals are more interesting and impressive, and it doesn't water-down its concepts to be more accessible. Akira gets praise more for its merit, while the Matrix is praised because it's different and dares to make the audience think in an environment of total schlock. The Matrix is also somewhat(very) unoriginal and derivative. Even from a character standpoint, Akira is superior. Despite having a large cast and having little time spent just talking, even supporting characters are more fleshed out and compelling than Neo or Trinity or Morpheus(Cipher's not bad actually). The few talking scenes were poignant and moved the plot along in some way, while the Matrix indulged in longish, repetitive speeches that only served as exposition dumps or to indulge itself despite being in a visual media and having other options for communicating information. Akira came out more than ten years before too. The Matrix being far better remembered in the public conscious is a poor sign to me.

I liked the Matrix when I first saw it and that was only last year, so nostalgia didn't play any part in that enjoyment, but it didn't even come close to blowing me away enough to make me write word vomit like this.

 No.19569

>>19568
I'd also say Akira says a lot more about people, the way they perceive each other, and their relationship with authority and the government than the Matrix, which just alludes to the idea that what authorities tell people could be deceptive, and most people just extrapolate that the movie implied the government lies about so and so or just everything for nefarious purposes. The Matrix's 'best' theme of what reality actually means and whether it matters or not is hardly explored in a meaningful way(impacts characters and story). Again, most of the laundry list is only briefly touched on in some characters conversation. That's why Cipher and Anent Smith are the best characters and could potentially make for more compelling protagonists than what we got with the whole chosen one crap.

 No.19598

File: 1542365690611.jpg (143.32 KB, 900x1200, LittleWitchAcademia-Akko-b….jpg)




File: 1541911111203.jpg (66.73 KB, 757x1200, 368e18751f16.jpg)

 No.19591[Reply]

hello, can anyone throw off yume nikki 0.10 not exe? For easyrpg on android.

 No.19592


 No.19593

File: 1541914454952.png (52.7 KB, 854x480, Screenshot_2018-11-11-08-3….png)

>>19592
Thank you very much.

 No.19594

>>19591
why are you writing this in off-topic? there is a Yume Nikki board for that

 No.19597

>>19594
sorry, i thought /ot/ stood for on topic



File: 1542209257253.jpg (43.56 KB, 400x400, hVeVA7Z.jpg)

 No.19595[Reply]

In the past I have been diagnosed with general anxiety disorder and more specifically social anxiety disorder.
It was so bad I couldn't even look people in the eye and I would start shaking whenever I feel like I am looked at, I would run out of classrooms at university because of anxiety attacks.
I can't remember what I was on back at the time.

I have now started a new course ( which basically guranatees a job ) and it's back. It's more under control because I am more mature and have learned to breathe, try to calm myself and distract myself but it still doesn't let me function as a human being. ( + )

I am too poor to afford therapy but my cousin works as a nurse. I have access to: paroxetine, citalopram, sertraline, venlafaxine, regabalin, tradozone and alprazolam.

( + ) I'm currently anticipating social situations and taking 0.50 of xanax ahead with like half or 3 quarters of an hour but this will not last me long because I'm developing resilience to the drug ( I used to take 0.25 ).

I exercise using the bodyweight fitness app whenever I can. I do not drink coffee, alcohol or energy drinks. I used to drink tea but at some point I realised black tea unsettles me and I kind of stopped.

My concerns are anhedonia and gaining weight because this happened last time.
I plan on informing myself for a few weeks first and I am seeking help.
If you can and want please share this post to communities which you think might me knowledgeable.
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 No.19596

Moved to >>>/hikki/5262.



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