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/hikki/ - NEET / Advice

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I forgot to turn off the snow because I have only been checking the site from my phone and it doesn't show on mobile. Haha silly me.
And now, more snow!

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 No.1505[Reply]

I miss the NEET life I had…

> Current life in an apartment with girlfriend
> Have a job

But I'm still not happy. I feel I don't have enough free time. If I'm not working I have too little time left to sit down and actually enjoy a game, and when I don't do that I have to invest time in my relationship, and when I'm not even doing that, I have responsibilities to take care of.

Even if I have a job, I do NOT have money for myself, at all. When I was a NEET all my money and time was only for me, myself, and I. I don`t wanna go to work, I wanna sit down on my ass and make games and play games, but this lifestlye is long gone, no longer available. I regret some life decisions I made, I really, really wish I could still be a NEET.

Best scenario would be: Keeping my gf, become a NEET again, but this is clearly impossible.

Have you ever experienced regret from no longer being a NEET?
34 posts and 8 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.6531

>>1505
>I'm still not happy
There's some root problem you're not adressing.

 No.6559

>>6529
>The problem isn't her, it's your job. Find a way to work less so you have more time to yourself.

He did say best case scenario is become neet and keep GF rather than NEET and drop GF or have or NEET and no GF

 No.6560

>>6559
I felt the need to reiterate I guess because other posters were telling him to drop his girlfriend and I think this is a bad idea.

 No.7465

>>1505
Had this life and was not happy, but returning to NEET life isnt the answer

 No.7507

>>6529
bad advice


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 No.7245[Reply]

Don’t want to mention the specifics of what happened to me, but I fucked up without a doubt. How do you anons best deal with embarrassment? I feel like a child for stressing about this shit but I’ve never really had anyone to talk about this type of social stress.
1 post omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.7287

Embarrassment and shame have plagued me all my life, and I'm 31 now and still have trouble dealing with those feelings. I'm currently working on it with a psychotherapist. In my case, the embarrassment itself is relatively benign, the issue is just that it tends to lead me to negative thoughts about myself, such as "I'm stupid and fundamentally defective", which cause me to engage in harmful activities. Those thoughts are often irrational. The therapist has presented me with a sort of mental framework for analysing these thoughts and accompanying feelings, as well as the actions that trigger them. It's very useful to me. I'm still working on getting into a habit of using it. It has me specify the action that happened, the beliefs that arose in my head as a result, the changes in my physical condition (bodily responses to emotions), and the consequences of all the beforementioned, i.e. how I reacted. Then, I can confront my beliefs if they are irrational, and examine my reaction. It's a very versatile tool for introspection.

 No.7466

>>7245
Been embarrassed so many times that I don't think it would affect me anymore

 No.7504

If it's small I just kind of make it a joke and that usually makes it bearable
The ones I can't do that on are usually so bad that I just kind of wait for it to pass and just accept the outcomes

 No.7505

Some years ago, I bought my first ever car. I had only recently learned to drive, and I wasn't good at it - I'm always slow to learn new things. The truth was that I was really really insecure about my driving - I was having nightmares frequently about being forced to drive on dangerous roads because of emergency situations.

On the test drive, with the seller in the passenger seat, I almost got into an accident when I tried to forcefully merge into a busy lane. I swerved out of the way of a car at the last split-second and ended up being forced to take the highway out of town. We sat there in silence. Eventually we turned around and headed back, and he tried to play it off like nothing had happened, so I followed suit. I told him the car seemed good, and we scheduled to meet later for the actual purchase at a garage.

I went home and locked my door behind me, went into my bedroom, locked my bedroom door behind me, and had the most intense panic attack of my life where the moment of the car I was merging into looming closer played on repeat for about 3 or 4 hours until I passed out. I woke up later and continued to freak out some more, and then I was berating myself about how I can't do any normal thing correctly. During that moment I was like "wait - I had a close call, not even a real accident, and it's completely debilitating me. I can't live like that. I really can't. I need to get over this immediately." Somehow, that worked.

>7287
For me, it's somewhat similar. I think about everything negatively, and it's hard for me to imagine how I want to be or want to feel, but easy for me to imagine what I would consider awful or disapprove of. I focus mostly on the consequences of those feelings.

"Is this useful to me? What is this feeling actually doing to me, for me? What is my plan? If I intend to keep trying, to live and grow, then I should hold myself back only the minimum necessary amount."

That helps me see it as irrational, as not 'right', and that gives me a huge boost in my ability to move on from it. It will still haunt me somewhat, but somehow I'll know "I can get over this - eventually." That's what was sort of forced into place by that driving incident - my embarrassment and the subsequent response to it was so severe that even in the middle of the panic attack I realized how absurd it was.

 No.7506

>>7505

What you did after you came home resonate a lot with what I would like to do once I remember some cringe moments in my past.


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 No.7488[Reply]

I'm beginning to believe that there is truly a hard set limit regarding how much we can truly improve ourselves.
I used to be a hikki, I didn't want to go outside, I watched anime and played video games all day, I took part in niche communities and hobbies and was generally a social outcast. Yet I had aspirations to get a slice of a regular life, a slice with friends and girls like you'd see in your SOLs, and so I did it.
Throughout all the odds and all the pain I forced myself to go out relatively frequently, I got the friends, I got the life I even got a girl for a short period of time. Sure I wasn't a chad or even a normie but for a long time I experienced true cyborgism, something I had worked towards for ages.
Yet for what? What has it brought me? I've never enjoyed it, I've never enjoyed socializing, hanging out, having a girlfriend, nothing. Even after I shed my anxiety all I was left with was a general distaste for socializing. Socializing has mostly brought me hardships and suffering I still experience today, and it just makes me think "why did I make myself do this for so long when I never enjoyed it?"
And it made me realize something. Of course I didn't enjoy it, it's simply not who I am. Simply not what I was built to enjoy. This extroversion, this social life, it's simply not for me. And yet I, and collectively a large amount of shut ins, had/have this illusion that being extroverted is something to aspire to, a self improvement goal. But it isn't, there are simply those built to have a normal social life and those who aren't. Not everyone can or even necessarily wants to have this social life, yet it's almost like we're brainwashed into thinking that it's an inherently better way of life than what we have now. There is a fine line between self improvement and being someone you're not.
Proper hygiene, cleanliness, passion to do anything, are all things that are self improvement, but being someone you're not, a normie, a cyborg a social individual is simply something you're born with or not, and I think accepting that reality is pretty important.
Sorry for the text dump, just getting that off my chest before I resume going back into full blown hikkism like days of yester year.
2 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.7494

>Yet for what? What has it brought me? I've never enjoyed it, I've never enjoyed socializing, hanging out, having a girlfriend, nothing. Even after I shed my anxiety all I was left with was a general distaste for socializing.
You must either like socializing enough or feel enough of an aversion to isolation (or a drive to conform) to do so. That includes coming on here and posting this because online posting is a form of socialization when one expects interaction in turn, especially if it is done for non-practical reasons. You posting that you dislike socialization is ironic, though understandable. I dislike it too, but I engage in it through imageboards because my mind likely sees this as a way to fulfill social desires without incurring as much of a burden as one would face in real life.

Self-improvement is fallacious because it assumes that there is always something needing to be improved on and that you are flawed from the get-go. There is no need to "self-improve" unless you neglect hygiene and other basic things. Why the hell should anyone waste years of their life "self-improving?" If you need to get by, then do what must be done (job, military, welfare, etc.). Just enjoy this life as it comes, fulfill basic needs like shelter, and you are set.

>>7490
>achieve greatness
What would you define "greatness" as?

 No.7495

>>7494
>>You must either like socializing enough or feel enough of an aversion to isolation (or a drive to conform) to do so.

I suppose I was too broad, of course everyone requires an amount of socialization (as we are group animals) and I too find image boards to be the most comfortable level of such socialization i can consistently tolerate, anything beyond that is when it starts becoming much of a nuisance.

I did desire conformity, because I was simply made to believe that it was the only way to properly live.

>Self-improvement is fallacious because it assumes that there is always something needing to be improved on and that you are flawed from the get-go.

We are inherently flawed as perfection is only an ideal created as a goal post for improvement. The argument whether you 'should' aim for improvement or not is of course entirely subjective, and I think either opinion is fine, but the desire to self improve, whether that be in a skill, socializing, or else wise is something most people have even if they don't inherently act on it.

I also have things in life I'd like to improve in, skills and crafts, but I think it's important to realize what you truly want to improve on and what you've been made into thinking you need to improve on. I've wasted so much time and money wanting to be better at socializing simply because I was made to believe that was something you had to do. It simply is not the case beyond non-utilitarian reasons, as is most other skills you do not wish to strive for.
As you said, there is no need beyond what is needed to get by. It simply took quite a long time for me to truly realize that

 No.7498

>>7488
>I even got a girl for a short period of time
How do you form a relationship?
People sometimes say that it will develop on its own after the initial effort and that one should not overthink it, but I know that I would need to apply myself to ever achieve one because of how reserved I am. How did you do it?

 No.7499

>>7498
How do you form a relationship?

I dunno anon. I wasn't really the one who did any of the initiation. She had been a friend of mine for a while and one day she made a joke about us being together and I jokingly played along with it. After like a week of this joke she asked me privately if maybe I wanted to make it a real thing and if she could take me out on a date and I thought she was a pretty cool friend so I kinda just went with the flow.

I wasn't interested in her beforehand, and I never really felt anything that I would classify as love. The relationship only lasted around a year (though I was the one who broke it off) so I wouldn't really promote the 'go with the flow' attitude that I took.

I guess what I'm saying is that in my case it did kind of develop on its own, or at least I wasn't the one to develop it, but you kind of at least need to be aware of the person in a romantic way because the person who I ended up getting just 'leaving it develop' wasn't someone I was really into to begin with.

>> but I know that I would need to apply myself to ever achieve one because of how reserved I am

I dunno, I'm pretty reserved myself, even when I did socialize a lot. Not because I was ever particularly anxious, I just didn't talk much and always kept to the sidelines unless made to do else wise. I don't really think being reserved was much of a hindrance.

If you want my 2 cents I think it was just luck.

 No.7502

>>7490
As someone who's extensively browsed r9k, OP's post is nothing akin to the garbage that gets posted there (and was quite relatable in fact). Being realistic about ones potential for growth isn't the same thing as being a needlessly defeatist tumor.


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 No.4030[Reply]

I've given up with my life and want to end it but I also want to end it as well for a fuck ton of over people what do?

[spoiler] Thinking about blowing up a crowded subway car or something.
5 posts and 3 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.4083

>>4030
>I've given up with my life and want to end it but I also want to end it as well for a fuck ton of over people


You probably shouldn't have post this here anon maybe /r9k/ would have been a better place just saying have fun in jail OP.

 No.4084

>>4030
Quick, take a pic of your butthole as it is right now so we can compare it to when you get out of prison.

Also, was uboa down for a few hours for anyone else?

 No.4111

File: 1511704804524.jpg (29.97 KB, 372x501, 1f4515f4e71b718994ec131a73….jpg)

and I would have gotten away with it too if it weren't for you meddling kids

 No.7491

>>4030
What's the point of killing a bunch of random people who have done nothing to you? The only thing you'll achieve is increasing misery in the world.

 No.7496

>>7491
I assume OP was some troll, but it's obvious as to why people do things like that: It's because they want to induce that misery in people. A mere "directionless" person without anger or frustration probably wouldn't want to do a mass attack. It's people who want to "get back" at society in the aggregate by causing as much physical and psychological damage to the collective as possible. Of course, this lashing out often leads to the person's death, but there is a clear goal to it, and it is often done by disadvantaged people like high school dropouts such as Ramos, Cruz, Steinhauser, etc.
This explains many untargeted attacks by non-political killers.


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 No.7234[Reply]

Perhaps it's a stupid question, however having never worked a day in my life I feel this feeling is no different from the existential dread of the inevitability of growing old and dying. Just as if you're severely balding or have some kind of terminal illness, there is quite literally nothing one can do to prevent it. As of now I can only feel numb to the fact.

>Question: How can one manage to survive as a hikkikomori? Answer: Because one's food, clothing, and shelter are often assured regardless of situation. In today's society, as long as you're guaranteed the barest essentials, you can continue to live out your hollow existence indefinitely. I didn't realize it before, but in a way, being able to live as a hikkikomori is a luxury. Without the assurance of food, clothing, and shelter; unless you're prepared to die, there's no other choice but to work.
13 posts and 5 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.7374

>>7341
And what were you doing all day in that computer

 No.7377

>>7374
general admin, order inputs, appointment/meeting schedules and some note taking. i had the "special" privilege of not using the phone either, being such a socially awkward sperglord. with no real raise or promotion path, i never thought just typing stuff for an hour a day at most would be so soul crushing.

again, though, it was the isolation of it all that got to me. you can ignore quiet, asocial peers if you're keeping busy, but i was not. though it may be an assumption to say a lot of people here might have similar people issues to me, i think they might, so my advice remains keeping busy with engaging work if you find a job again.

 No.7403

>>7377
I was in the same position after I graduated from university, until about a year ago when I had a breakdown and became NEET.

I found when I spent so long trying to look busy by doing nothing at all, when real work came along I couldn't see the difference anymore. It all felt so pointless, and then I began to take that poison home with me.

When started my last job the 2-hour commute was the part I hated most, but by the end it was the only enjoyable part of my day.

 No.7414

Work/school doesn't get easier over time, I was miserable for nearly my whole life before I became a NEET
It puts me in this mindset that is impossible to get out of, and I can't ever clear my head even after hours or days of being away from work or school. It's permanently draining and there's no way to cope with it.
Constantly feeling worthless, encounters with other people wont go out of my head, as well as the noise. I can't deal with it, but I'll have to soon. Can't. Whatever

 No.7484

>>7414
It'll be okay anon. One way or another, the misery will end. That's what I hold onto.


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 No.4828[Reply]

From my past experiences and casual observation, I came to a conclusion about why people have friends. There's two reasons: entertainment, and validation. I've seen a lot of this myself from my own friendships. I haven't had many, so I can list them all pretty easily.

Michael 1: I met him on the bus on my first day of kindergarten. He sat next to me and that was all it took to form some kind of bond between us. By some luck, we happened to have the same class for all of the pre-grade years. One time, I saw him talking to a girl for a long time during recess and started running around teasing him about it. At the end of the day I apologized and he started going on about wanting to marry her one day. Okay. As soon as first grade started, we were placed in different classrooms. I was worried about it and rightfully so. We immediately started talking way less. As soon as I moved that was the end of our relationship. There was little to no goodbye and I had no way of keeping in touch. Who knows if he remembers me.

Annie: Annie was another school friend I had before I moved. She's the only girl I have ever been real friends with. She had kind of childish tastes even for that age and made me play ring around the rosy with her. After a bunch of boys who I already didn't like started teasing me about it, I started giving her the cold shoulder and eventually she got pissed off at me. That was how our relationship was left off. There was no real conclusion. I still regret it, but here's the thing. It wouldn't have made any difference if I had left on good note with her. It's not like there's any way we could have stayed in touch. Phone numbers were beyond me at the time. Even then it would fizzle. It's just one of those totally inconsequential things.

Michael 2: Michael 2 is where things start getting more interesting. Michael lived across the street and he was an odd character. He was a blond, classic Americana kind of boy, except he has this weird sadistic/violent streak in him. We would always play soccer together against each other's sisters and we would always win. He would then treat me to Gatorade after every game and the whole deal. He was obsessed with this wrestling game and naturally I wanted to play it with him just because of that. The more sociopathic side of him came out sometimes though. One time while he was riding his bike across the street and passing me, he flipped me off because he was mad about something. Another timPost too long. Click here to view the full text.
11 posts and 5 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.4874

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>>4873
Yeah, i'm fine with dying sooner. It's not worth it.
>You're asking to be able treat a relationship casually while getting total conviction from the other person
I already said twice that that's not what i'm asking for. I don't even know what you mean by treating a relationship casually. I don't make those kinds of distinctions. A relationship is just a relationship to me.
>the other people you deal with also have to bend over
How? How did I ever make people bend over for me? They say something to me, and I always listened and responded. That's it. Even if they didn't say anything to me, I would still opt to be around them. They could just be silent the whole time and I would be fine with that as long as they responded to me. Maybe i'd be confused.
>But it's necessary for both parties to put themselves out there
I never complained about how people establish relationships. Sure, you have to put yourself out there. My problem is with how you have to keep putting yourself out, and keep jingling keys in their face so they don't turn away. I think relationships should be binary and perpetual. Once it is created, unless there is some very good reason for it to end, it remains. Forever, and in the same state. That it what I want. I want somebody with no spines. I don't want to waste energy playing touch and go and getting pricked. I don't want to deal with that, even if it's detrimental to my health.

 No.5122

>>4831
>I was too dull and quiet to entertain anybody for long. Too dull to give your cellphone number to. To dull to stick around with. I was thrown out like a used tissue. I'm not making this thread because i'm bitter towards one person, i'm making it see if anybody else can see what I see. I'd like to hear about any similar experiences.
Thanks for relating your experiences, OP. I can see things like that too, but at the moment I do not want to type it all up. Too much thinking.

 No.7155

I really, really like the contents of this thread. That is all.

 No.7163

File: 1652329522551.gif (256.93 KB, 640x480, 1646119633991.gif)

I found this whole thread to be extremely relatable. My friendships throughout my life have been very similar to yours, OP. Even if I spent hours talking to someone, at some point they would get bored of me and we'd just stop talking. If not that, then they end up hating me for whatever reason, they get sick of me, and I never usually find out what it is I did wrong. This has been a repeating cycle in my life. One of the best examples I can think of is a girl I knew from primary school messaged me on Facebook a few years back and we started talking again. We spoke for a month or so, before eventually she started giving me dismissive short responses, or just didn't respond at all. Then someone else I knew at the time messaged me about her, and showed me that she was now talking to him the same way she did to me. I simply stopped being entertaining to her and she latched onto the next guy who would give her attention. I don't understand how you can just drop someone from your life because you're bored with them, like they're a toy you don't want to play with anymore. I will never really understand neurotypicals and their sociopathic way of thinking.

 No.7483

>>4828
I enjoyed this thread a lot. It was really interesting and thought provoking to see you recap your friendships throughout your life. Makes me think about my own history of friendships and current ones.


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 No.2906[Reply]

I'm not too sure this goes on this board but it feels like it'd fit here more than Off-topic.

Anyway, does anyone here have an imaginary friend? Any kind, I think even tulpa sort of count. If so I'd love to hear stories even if it's childhood imaginary friends. More so I'm interested in how many NEETs and Hikkikomori have them and how it affects your day to day life.
31 posts and 10 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.5913

I don't have an imaginary friend

 No.7469

File: 1665686898751.jpg (68.6 KB, 728x803, 5a04f558adb6580be5c75d91eb.jpg)

>>2906
Sometimes I talk to objects (like the batteries in my remote) and pretend like they're alive and give them voices but I dont think this counts

 No.7474

I used to have a waifu who I imagined and talked to. It actually helped a little, like when I was in stressful situations I would imagine her there, reassuring me and telling me things were going to be okay, which would calm me down.

 No.7480

when i was a teenager i used to have a tulpa kaworu boyfriend i used to talk to all the time on my way home from highschool.
funnily enough after some time I would genuinely feel some form of love emotion when he was being affectionate towards me.

That make belief love was stronger than any love I've ever felt from real people

 No.7481

File: 1666182044654.jpg (121.08 KB, 1532x748, dust_message-e144089794237….jpg)

I believe there's a spirit guide that watches over me. I've never communicated with it one to one, but it'll manipulate reality around me and put me in situations that I can learn from, while also making sure I'm okay. I believe it's a female entity, almost like a motherly figure that keeps me on the right track in life. Sometimes bad things will happen, but I always end up learning something important from those happenings that I needed to know later on. The only time I feel like I saw her was during a DMT trip where I saw it as this all encompassing geometrical figure orbiting my life like the moon. We didn't communicate in that instance either, but I'm almost certain it was her. Looking back on life, it was always kinda obvious I was being protected. I'd get out of incredibly dangerous and life ruining situations unscathed. Wasn't until a couple years ago where I thought about it and started believing that an entity/guardian angel must be protecting me. I think she does it because I have a higher purpose in life, which gives me confidence to make big decisions and chase my dreams. I don't feel invincible, but I do definitely feel like there is a path I can follow, kinda like the good ending, that this entity presents to me and it's my choice to follow.

(Interstellar spoilers) The best way I can describe how it feels is like when Cooper discovers, at the very end of Interstellar, that the beings helping them, the ones they thought were aliens, were actually higher dimensional humans. We never see definite proof of this claim, but it's what Cooper believes after he thinks about all they've experienced and how they experienced it. Love that movie btw, everyone should watch it


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 No.7400[Reply]

Any winners?
10 posts and 6 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.7458

File: 1665340276761.png (190.78 KB, 875x804, 1663458833232.png)

>>7400

No, I couldn't even win at this

 No.7459

File: 1665418846686.png (201.94 KB, 867x782, ClipboardImage.png)

Almost a bingo, huh

I hate my life

 No.7460

File: 1665455537112.jpg (222.98 KB, 875x804, [a.jpg)


 No.7462

>>7459
Actually, you got diagonal double bingo.

 No.7475

File: 1665778697820.png (204.89 KB, 875x804, 223.png)

thought I'd hit a lot less than I did but here I am


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 No.3622[Reply]

Yoo

Im a neet too, a neet for many many years

I dont like to whine, not fond of self piety as its painfull and dangerous

Im prety good at avoiding reality with games, animes and random interests I cant keep for longer than a week

Life sucks but I cant fuck my family over with suicide. They arent the best but I cant do that.

Im 36 and despite being intelligent and talented with words , I have no skills, no degrees and no experience.

Nowadays ive been more and more unable to block reality as the rope is slowly tightened around my neck. Despair is starting to settle in and im looking for a way out of this shit.

Good thing is my parents might last for a few years and I can still train myself and try to get a job even when im so old.
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.
3 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.3632

>>3631
as a working programmer who did not start at 10 and used to feel the same way this is almost entirely BS and you are fine

 No.3633

File: 1499974267667.jpg (164.21 KB, 954x630, the_monkeys_paw5.jpg)

learn c OP

 No.3674

The problem with todays work market is that every single company, no matter how shitty it is, wants only the crème de la crème of the work force. They can afford their behaviour today because the work market today is a global one. You cannot find a genius engineer that will work for 15% less pay than average? No problem, put an add in estonia, you will have 50 applicants for this offer in no time.

However, times are not getting hard for us here. Very bad times are ahead of us and I doubt

In Japan, already 39% of the workforce is only part time employed. That means they work 7 hours a day, 6 days a week and earn 3 dollars per hour. Full time employment means you work 12 hours per day for a little more. People who lose their jobs end up homeless very fast because there is no unemployment money or welfare from the government. Young people who earn badly often end up in appartements with up to 8 or 9 other young people in similar situations.

In China, many factories are closing and the labourers who came from rural villages cannot find new work anymore because when you are past age 35 nobody wants you anymore. Many factories are beeing abandonned and rebuilt in cheaper places like Vietnam, Bangladesh and soon Burma. Many of those people are forced to leave the cities and go back to their ancestoral homelands in the villages. Then you have other Chinese who are young but still struggle to survive in cities even with jobs. I watched how one newspaper reporter lives in a bunker/basement and barely can afford the rent. Then one couple that lives in a bungalow with no running water and a shared toilet with 10 other "appartements". Then at the same time, there are ghost cities everywhere beeing built. I always believed that those ghost cities don't belong to anyone but this is wrong. Rich upper middle class people have bought those appartements in the ghost cities and now try to turn a profit on those investments by renting or selling it.

In America you have tent cities on the rise everywhere. Homeless people make up about 1% of the population already. In Silicon valley, rents have become so expensive that even workers from the prestigous tech companies cannot afford to rent and instead live in their cars. This is all happening while about 14% of real estate is not occupied by anyone. Bureau of statistics claims that jobs are in recovery mode but they do not tell you that most of the new jobs beeing created are waiter and bartendePost too long. Click here to view the full text.

 No.7356

>>3625
Can attest , the 4 hour introductory python and C++ programming tutorials are great.

 No.7461

>>3674
ninja


File: 1618670698407.jpg (86.42 KB, 913x1280, pillow.jpg)

 No.6535[Reply]

How do you make online friends? Where did you meet yours? I'm so fucking lonely. I figured out I could ask here because none of you are going to give me shit advice like "go outside."
47 posts and 11 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.7385

I'd like to expand on >>6536's answer.
1. Look for communities that match your interests
2. Talk to people there
3. Look for people you think you'd enjoy talking to and try adding them to contacts and chatting privately
This may or may not result in a friendship. This is a huge gamble and you may not connect with the other person at all, so be ready for that. But don't give up. Also, you'll probably have to be the first to initiate conversations 9 times out of 10. You'll also need to put yourself out there. Like, you'll have to reveal something private about yourself at some point and check if the other person reciprocates. People seem to prefer being given declarative statements like "I (don't) like x and here's why" that they can respond to over being asked questions about themselves. This is an oversimplification and there's a lot of nuance to it. Talking to people is a skill that can be learned through experience.

 No.7420

>>6535
I want talk to you

 No.7430

>>7385
>People seem to prefer being given declarative statements like "I (don't) like x and here's why" that they can respond to over being asked questions about themselves.
I've seen the opposite. Statements don't need or get replies 99% of the time. People reply to questions, not statements. The only way I can keep a text conversation going is with questions. With voice conversations, stories seem to work best. I could say "Ian's about to hit Tampa" and nothing else and be met with crickets. Or I could say "Imagine if a hockey game really did break out at a boxing match. These two are ready to fight when all of a sudden 2 rifts open up on opposite corners of the ring and out one end comes the whole Seattle Kraken team…" and that begets a great deal of conversation.

 No.7431

Years ago, when facebook meme pages were a big scene, I ended up joining one on a pure whim because the admin posted that there were essentially open tryouts. I was one of the admins on this page for a while, and eventually people liked my posts so I got invited into a group chat. Since then, I've been in several others and know some of these people very well.

In another instance, a person I knew irl who I hadn't seen in years wanted to reach out to me, and he knew I was hikki, so he invited me to a discord with him and his friends, who would eventually become my friends.

As for how you can do it, well, these are mediocre examples, really. I got lucky. When it comes to meeting people, luck is one of the most important things: the people you meet could be shitty, or just not really your tempo. People who have great relationships are always lucky in at least that regard. But I'm not just gonna tell you to be lucky. I couldn't have gotten lucky in finding a friend group if I hadn't reached out to that stupid meme page (that page was just a waste of my time outside of meeting new people, which was totally worth it). I couldn't have gotten lucky to join that discord if I hadn't known that guy years ago, and I couldn't have made new friends on it if I hadn't had the guts to join it and talk to people there.

There are lots of random opportunities to meet people on the internet, some very active and some very passive. Joining discords, social media groups, and shit like that which can be based around a mutual interest is a good way to generate some compatibility. I'm in a sekiro modding discord right now, and it's a pretty active little community, where I know that the people there are interested in something I'm interested in, and inclined to be consuming the same stupid meme culture. I only joined it to get updates on a mod, but there's opportunities there. A lot of mods and modding communities have discords or forums. These are just examples.

Once you're actually in these situations where you can talk to people, there can be loads of other obstacles, such as: general awkwardness, bad empathy skills, short tempers, general lack of confidence, and apathy (the last one is the most difficult). Those can be problems on your part, but also all the other people, and quite possibly both. It generally helps with some situations to try and have more 1-on-1 interaction, though that can sometimes make interacting with weirdos worse, bPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

 No.7455

https://discord.gg/SswU6yjr3t

hiki neet sui sh


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