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/hikki/ - NEET / Advice

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File: 1525742505686.png (227.62 KB, 487x383, Rei_smile.png)

 No.4753[Reply]

My girlfriend is a NEET.

She has had a few jobs in the past, but she has always had to leave due to mental health problems. She has been struggling with mental health problems ever since her teenage years. Specifically, she has BPD and depression. I can relate with many of her feelings and experiences, because I also struggle with depression. One thing I should mention is that we have only talked online; I will be meeting her in person for the first time very soon. I seek other opinions and perspectives.

If you are in a situation similar to her, how would you want someone to support you?

If you have been in a similar situation, how did it go?
62 posts and 20 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.4881

>>4879
>goes into containment board
>complains it's a containment board
0/10 newfag isn't even trying. Please stop.

 No.6481

>>4851


>online long distance relationships exist and those isolated in their rooms won't be any less hikki for that.


I mean there could also be a physical relationship of 2 hikkies in a room togheter that dont interact with soceity and other stuff like a single hikki whould and tick all the boxes if we where to count them as one person like not going outside for 6 months and not interacting with others (other than themselfes) . dont know if that counts as hikki or just NEET.

While very unlikely , its a possibility , the most likely way i can think of is hikki meeting hikki online and falling in love then deciding to move in the same room.

I mean hikki is ultimately just a label to describe existing behaviour at the end of the day so it doesnt really matter of someone is labeled a hikki or not because if they still suffer most if not all the symptoms (for example didnt leave the room for 10 months except one time 5 months ago when they needed to buy milk from the store may not be techically hikki because they left the room but still suffer the acute social withdrawl and all that stuff).

 No.6488

>>6481
>if we where to count them as one person

 No.6489

>>6488
My ideea was that its a very socially recluse couple , as in:

-spending most of the day and nearly every day confined to home,

-marked and persistent avoidance of social situations, and social relationships, (except for the GF/BF)

-social withdrawal symptoms causing significant functional impairment,

-duration of at least six months, and
no apparent physical or mental etiology to account for the social withdrawal symptoms.

 No.6497

>>4784
If somebody wanted to be a normie they could do it on heyuri or 7chan
I'm glad you think you're that important



File: 1586209552062.png (637.68 KB, 700x994, EUup0H_UwAEyRLk.png)

 No.6127[Reply]

By self-improvement I mean doing more than the basics (getting a job/moving out), non-essential things like having hobbies or a social life. If I start now I will be quite old-ish by the time I see results, and most people will be moving on to something else. I cannot fill the gaps in experience, just make try to catch up and pretend I'm not behind.
Why?

 No.6128

just try to catch up*

 No.6129

>>6127
Plenty of people either do those things because they want to, or because they think they can find additional social acceptance for having done them (which is really just another way of saying they want to do them). If wanting to do them doesn't apply to you, then don't. But understand what frequently befalls those who choose not to do those things.

 No.6130

I was a loser a few months ago. I'm still a loser, but now I can play the piano at a very bad grade 2, draw very poorly, and just about understand Japanese spoken by a small child.
Still, I'd recommend it, especially if you're a NEET like I am, since you'll be doing something with your time. I started doing these because I wanted to.
My regret is not starting earlier, since I'd be way more proficient than I am now, and probably enjoying it more since I won't have the frustrations that come with being inept at things.

 No.6478

>>6127
Self-improvement should at the end of the day mean improving your life , making yourself a happier person (in the hedonistic sense) , this includes stuff like delayed gratification ofcourse.



>social life

If you dont want to have a social life its ok , if you do , thats ok as well. I personally just dont feel the need , considering you mentioned it you likely do. Do not be influenced by what others think of you (for example: "I must have [X] because soceity will thing bad of me if i dont")

Think about it , is it a genuine need to connect with other human beings (or something along those lines) or is it just "soceity will (not) like this" (do this for basically everything for example , nice cars, nice clothes, latest iphone , etc.) .If you do , i cant help you. The pandemic likely made it harder , and try finding people with similar intrests but thats about all i know.

WARNING: DONT fall into the trap of trying to delude yourself into thinking you dont want a social life when you acttualy do because its too dificult.



>hobbies

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 No.6479

>>6130
Need any art advice?

While i dont know what your weak and strong points are as i havent seen your art , i will give some general advice:

-Unlearn symbol drawing
Symbol drawing is when you draw what your mind thinks it sees rather than what your eyes actually see. You likely already got past this stage but i am mentioning it nonetheless.

Here is an exercise to help you unlearn it. Decide on a thing to draw , for example a lamp. Destroy all your preconceptions of how a lamp looks like. Think of it as an alien object that you need to document , you cant take photographs and you need to draw it as accurately as possible.


-Learn the fundamentals and start with perspective
if you can do perspective you can do whatever the fuck and it should look ok as long as the perspective is good it should look ok atleast. Feel free to break normal perspective if you want to go for a certain feeling but learn the rules before you break them.

You may at first fall into the trap of doing isometric perspective (the one you learn in math class and draw cubes with), in art perspective all parallel lines , eventually meet at a place called the "vanishing point" (the ones going up dont meet up if you are doing 2 point perspective , which is usually "good enought") , this point is usually on the horison line (aka. the eye line) but in certain cases its not (ie. Stuff that is slanted , you need an auxilarly vanishing point for those)
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File: 1611947472331.jpg (791.37 KB, 1920x1200, abyss-wallpaper-8.jpg)

 No.6378[Reply]

They have no idea how lucky they are to have a job. I've been a hikki since 2013 (I'm 27 now) and it seems there's no way of getting out. I fully believe I will expire as a homeless dude without a penny to my name. What a life.
6 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.6391

>>6385
Same, I think that's true for many of us.

 No.6394

When I am a neet, then after a few months I start to wish for a job.
When I have a job, then after a few months I start to wish to be a neet again.
Both has it's downsides and upsides, everytime I experience the downside from on thing I want the upside from the other back.

 No.6407

I worked in the past many years before being a hikki and it had its upsides I think it is important for people to work if they do not have any other goals in life it is artifical though and to devote yourself to working as a life goal is stupid but if you can honesty be happy to be a cog in the machine consuming and producing value then you really are lucky.

I get retardbux now and ony really spend my money on drugs.
I do not get annoyed when normies complain about working I get more annoyed when they try to tell people they need to work and I agree people need to work as a general rule but you hear young people berated for being a NEET more than for being lifeless droids that have no goal other than hedonism.

Us hikikomori are really just fucked if we have no goals it is all fucked I do not think we shoud look beyond the curtain if you can be normalscum go for it you are lucky not because you can get things that some of us desire but that you can desire at all.

I have had it all it is all shit I am just too afraid to kill myself at the moment because my drug use convinced me we do not die after death.

 No.6439

You die when you work.

 No.6464

You're all stupid and got brainwashed by bourgeois propaganda. Working for a wage will not make you happy nor set you free or whatever retards say these days, at best it won't make you have to worry about having food on your plate if you're poor, but it'll still make you miserable and crush your very soul.

Now, working on personal projects and just for fun is an entirely different matter.



File: 1576628028658.jpg (70.35 KB, 1059x791, refvisual9 saniiiwan.JPG)

 No.5955[Reply]

I wanna know if anyone here has completely given up on finding a partner. I feel like maybe accepting the forever alone lifestyle could bring some comfort and maybe happiness into my life. Maybe im too weird and fucked up, and giving up hope is the right thing to do. Thoughts?
88 posts and 25 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.6389

File: 1613241760901.jpg (34.75 KB, 544x305, 1378869759700.jpg)

It dawned on me that my life is so fundamentally different from that of the average human's and that really upset me for reasons I don't really understand. I think about it most evenings now and it's become very hard to sleep at night or get out of bed in the morning.
I read an article about how people were ignoring lockdowns to have sex, and it just hit me in a way I wasn't expecting.
Sex is a thing normal people have, and they have a lot of it. Intimate relationships are a thing normal people have. And that made me feel awful.
Most people have, at the very least, had a hug from a girl before they turned 23. Not me. I have missed out on one of the most basic experiences a human can have, it's only going to get more difficult to have it as time goes on, and being a NEET only going to make that more difficult. Someone suggested that I have sex with a female friend. I have never had a female friend.
I do not know how much longer I can put up with living like this. I have been miserable for the last quarter of my life, but never like this.

 No.6393

>>6389
sex won't make you happy
when people think it does, it's because they're so miserable that even that is better than nothing

 No.6406

>>6389
Sex doesn't matter to me anymore because I have hands. Still, having no emotional connection does make me suffer like nothing else. The lack of physical contact does hurt as well, but not being loved is the worst. I never had any female friends either, and never even met a female that I ever wanted to befriend anyway. Hope I can solve this sooner than later, but now my life is just a bunch of waiting and nothing else. I want to end my isolation but the world is getting in the way. It's almost like it knows.

 No.6425

>>5955
Fucking finding a partner lmao. It's exactly as you say, accepting the fl lifestyle allows you to focus on what makes you happy. I've been way less depressed since giving up on looking for a gf since i realized ive been wasting my time.

 No.6462

Some people ITT talk like only relationships between mentally sound people should be "allowed". Sure, your partner shouldn't be your therapist (because therapists fucking suck), but that doesn't mean you shouldn't help each other if you've got issues. That's a big part of friends or partners.

Not that I'd know, I'm completely aromantic and asexual and possibly autistic. I hope that doesn't detract from my point.



File: 1613448096474.jpg (1.71 MB, 1251x2000, EgGZ88PUwAA39sd.jpg)

 No.6390[Reply]

I think about it a lot. Normies look for help when they have mild anxiety/perceived worries and whatever they have is very easy to treat because their worries are baseless and the solution is usually "be positive and stop overthinking uwu". And then you have people like me, whose insecurities and reasons to worry are rooted in reality and confirmed every fucking day by other people. How are these people dealt with? "Be humble and accept that you're doomed to be a worthless retard"? No idea, I've sworn off seeking help but I'm beyond repair, I should be put down.
9 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.6438

Stop trying to gatekeep mental illness, holy fuck.

 No.6441

>>6438
If you are here at all chances are I wasn't talking about you. Don't be offended kek.

 No.6460

File: 1616568578876.jpg (5.53 KB, 253x199, *yawn* can you faggots mak….jpg)

>>6441
Offended? This whole "normalfag" (not "normie", you newfag) is just an unhealthy defense mechanism to feel better about your life.

It'd be a lot better to instead accept yourself AND everyone else instead of being as prejudiced as the stereotypical normal person is. Normalcy is just a spook anyway*, everyone on Earth is a lot more complicated than what appearances tell. And so are most mental illnesses, if you ask me. All this labeling and identity bullshit has done plenty of harm to humanity already.

 No.6461

To add to my point, plenty of so-called autistic people are just people who realize how retarded some social norms and willingly opt not to follow them, but psychologists don't care, it's easier to diagnose someone as crazy and make them take funny pills. And don't get me started on ADHD.

End of rant.

 No.6468

>>6460
I don't say "normalfag" because I'm not a disgusting 4chan neckbeard like the rest of you.(calm your beardless neck my dude)



File: 1614701947145.jpg (137.51 KB, 1079x1055, 344a28bc-2526-4fb0-84fc-67….jpg)

 No.6411[Reply]

Have any of you ever thought that you were born to be a reclusive, socially inept hikki? I know I was, given my circumstances and mental health. The universe placed us within our own trapped minds and didn't spare a wink.

But hey, at least it's peaceful living like this.
5 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.6420

It's so surreal to think that most people have lives and I don't. Even if I stopped being a hikki, I could never have a normal life, let alone a fulfilling life with nice memories.

Then there's the suicide option which is not that good because it would affect other people, not that anyone would miss me but I don't want to ruin anyone's mental health.

It's one of those things where you have no true solution, you have to make incredible efforts to be *normal* and barely even that, while people who started out in a better place have the means to do more. And when you draw the line at the end, who had the more important life? They don't give a fuck that the odds were against you since the beginning.

 No.6421

>>6420
Hey hikki we do have lives just not normalfag ones but can still enjoy the isolation lifestyle if you cannot stand not being physically near people you are unlucky hikki because I really love being isolated from people :3
Fuck being "normal"

 No.6423

>>6421 yeah isolation is the best!

 No.6424

>>6418
Same.Staying at home is much more preferable then going out and dealing with other people.

 No.6443

I've made my peace with it. Considering a lot of different factors, yes it was provably destined to be like this



File: 1591922952452.jpg (8.81 KB, 286x254, 33a8d604411445e3616673a496….jpg)

 No.6191[Reply]

>basically didn't leave my home during middle-school because bullying, depressed

>2~3 year of highschool were the best, actually made some friends and hang out with them


>got into college, was so motivated and happy

>my high school friends stop talking to me

>some only talk to me when they want something and when I try to talk to them they ignore me, so I don't know if they are my friends anymore


>start becoming lonely and depressed


>doesn't even have friends on the internet


>doing well in college but at the expense of my sanity


Post too long. Click here to view the full text.
7 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.6369

File: 1610859427727.png (647.85 KB, 800x600, 1536649727257.png)

>>6365
Not them, but I don't know where to look. I used to post my drawings on tumblr while it was alive, and surprisingly made some decent connections. It sounds silly, but I can't remember how. Time went on, and all those connections are gone now anyway. These days I only have a modest twitter, since I don't like having social media in the first place. Some neat artists follow me, but I have 0 idea how to initiate. I don't like the idea of just DM'ing and saying "Hi, what's up". Maybe we don't even have good chemistry. I don't like the idea of finding people on discord either. It's got a lot of people that aren't my type. All I can find online are either embarrassing meme lgbt weebs, or hans get ze flammenwerfer guys. Anyone exempt who did seem alright, we're really silent, and communication died pretty quick. I hate being the one that has to keep prodding for conversation.

I don't know where I fit in, I don't know where to look. A while back I was even desperate enough to try tossing my hat in /soc/. Besides some people back from highschool, uboachan is the closest I've felt to fitting in before.

 No.6372

>>6369
Same. Only that I don't have people irl.

 No.6373

>>6369
That's pretty much how I feel. In a way, the internet is even worse than real life. I can think of things I could do in real life. Going to the right places would probably work, and allow coincidences to happen. On the internet, I have to be active, but how and where? Even if I go to a place full of people, the fact that it's online doesn't make me suddenly like interacting with groups of people. It's terrible.

 No.6376

File: 1611514465935.jpg (Spoiler Image, 7.07 MB, 3944x6000, blacked.booru.org_17937_1b….jpg)

Finding similar interests seems to be the key. Discord is weird in that you can join a server for pretty much any anime or gacha game from the last 6 years, and instantly join an autistic 24/7 conversation about say, shipgirls, since that's the channel's only topic. But those people rarely become your friends. The best luck I've had with making friends is finding people with the same sexual preferences and fetishes. It's kind of sad. The men I connect with the most are the ones where we can share pictures and circlejerk together. Outside of them, I'm always the one to initiate. I used to be a coomer who regularly fapped twice/day. I've since cut it down to once every other day, but it seems it hasn't changed me mentally beyond regaining self-control. I can actually spend entire days focusing on my real hobbies without a sexual thought, but they're all solitary. Like I said before, similar interests help but it's not healthy if those interests just make you and your friends enable eachother endlessly. Pic related - I've formed some deep friendships around this fetish.

 No.6377

>>6376
Of course, common interests are a necessity. But I wonder why sexual interests would work better. Seems very strange to me to form connections through that, with people that I'm not even sexually interest in. Not sure if I could do it myself.



File: 1608476546101.gif (24.49 KB, 395x542, 1608109190919.gif)

 No.6339[Reply]

i was a neet at a certain point and i was put in a psychiatric hospital because of it, it didnt help at all and made my condition and my comfortableness with being in my room bad, what im saying is i cant be comfortable while in my room beause of my experinces.

 No.6341

File: 1608901368969.png (192.26 KB, 444x330, 1526030364051.png)

What did you experience for you not to be comfortable in your room anymore, anon?

 No.6371

>>6339
>not being comfy in a room because been in a psychiatric hospital
What is it about this that made you uncomfy I am the same and for me it was having people come forcibly remove me and place me with schizos to "help" me.

 No.6465

>i was a neet at a certain point and i was put in a psychiatric hospital because of it
Sounds like your family fucking sucks, dude.



File: 1455538227328.png (62.64 KB, 450x350, 1447418266991.png)

 No.416[Reply]

I'm sure many of you know this feel:

>Realize you need to go somewhere with your life or everything will end horribly when you least expect it to


>Attempt to get something done


>If not 5 minutes later, you are eventually hit by a varying intense level of depression while attempting to do whatever task you decided, as if by facing your life, you can no longer not face how you are feeling.


>end up going back to the computer to distract yourself from the pain after only getting 1 thing done if you are lucky.


For any former NEETs here, how the fuck did you get past this? I feel the more I force myself to endure the depression the more depressed I get and the harder it is to get shit done, as fucking pretentious edgelordriffic as that unintentionally sounds.
6 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.6357

>>6095
That's retarded, being able to fit in society is a matter of your own perspective.

 No.6368

not to say i am a former NEET but i have recovered/relapsed several times, sometimes with years of non-NEETism inbetween the severe relapses (first NEET experience @ 12yo, didn't leave my house more than 6 times that year, and only by force/coercion)

anyway i have never "gotten past" this but finally getting diagnosed with autism and ADHD at the age of 29 sure helped a fucking lot in terms of explaining things (besides the crippling depression, part of which but not all can be attributed to going undiagnosed)

Not going to pretend like things get better and stay better consistently - they absolutely don't- but with the right therapist (HAHAHA GOOD LUCK) and the right meds (again GL finding those) things can improve.

 No.6370

I cannot even watch anime naymore I do not even know how I spend my time I just exist and hate existing and rely on drugs if I have any please do not reach this stage it is horrible.
What is the point of improving if there is nothing to improve for??

 No.6392

>>6357
Society disagrees.

 No.6466

We all need to do "something" with our lives, but you need to define that yourself or you're going to end up like most people on this board.



File: 1454969213852.jpg (616.05 KB, 1000x793, tumblr_inline_ntkacfAlA01r….jpg)

 No.249[Reply]

Hello everybody, I just find this forum. It's been almost a year since I became a NEET. I tried for a few months to go to college but it did not work. I wonder what people like me think about the future. Do you think we can go on like this forever? Well, I have no ambition, and I think things will never change. Do you wanna change?
18 posts and 10 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.790

>>788
Please call them. The best you can do is the best you can do. The best you can do changes when you make a mistake. If you don't call them, you won't learn how to do better.

>But if I could be NEET forever I would, because less people can hurt me if I stay away from them.

I used to be a NEET for a while for this very reason.

Now it's been a few years.

Now I think, "less people can love me if I stay away from them."

 No.791

It takes a toll on one's mind and body not to do anything for an extended amount of time.
Long story short, I had an incident one time when I went outside. A life changing, broken bones sort of incident. And it made me fucking paranoid to go outside again. I just want to stay inside constantly, but fuck, I also want to enjoy life. I don't want to be a miserable douchebag with no aspirations, I want to enjoy myself.
However, I'm literally scared of everything. So back to feeling shit and being a NEET I go.

 No.6238

>>659
I feel this to be true.
I've been NEET for 7 years now and I feel blessed for having time work on hobbies, learning things and a whole lot of procrastination without really having to worry about the future.

When I was still being push to become something and work on some kind of schedule it made me insanely unhappy each time and I basically never got along with more people at those places either.
If being a NEET isn't destroying you mentally somehow I'd say you should savor it as long as you can, because for most people it will only be a phase in life.

 No.6251

I've been a NEET since 2011, following a suicide attempt partially due to university at the time. I've done nothing ever since, I've made a few attempts at getting back into uni but they've all failed so far. I'm thinking of getting a certificate III in something or maybe even a diploma if I'm capable.

I've wanted to change for a long but my only real motivator for that died a few years back and I've kind of just been floating ever since. I've tried talking to friend and family about it but they don't seem to understand, take me seriously, I struggle effectively opening up or all three of those. I do like the idea of helping people, especially teenagers and new adults figure things out and to avoid them ending up like me, a decade after graduating high school and having achieved nothing. My social anxiety and other mental issues will be a big problem with doing that though, since I barely know how to talk to people properly besides my grandparents and friend or saying basic shit to cashiers while getting served. While I guess I could have fucked up worse, could have gotten on drugs harder than weed, had a bunch of kids I couldn't look after or get an STD or something on par with those, I still feel like a major fuck up for the past decade of absolutely nothing. It's to the point that I have dreams about getting a similar job to my cashier job I had in high school and going over how I fucked that job up, but as an adult this time.

The decade of NEETdom has kept me back, like time while physically continuing feels like it should have stopped at one point. One way I look at it is from console generations. I graduated high school in 2010, the peak of the 360 and PS4, not those consoles are gone, the Wii store is gone, the servers for games I heard were coming out soon are closing and it feels like I just blinked, the consoles that replaced those consoles will be gone soon to.
The three main things I've considered studying to help get me a job is:
Cert III in Health Services Assistance - basically become a hospital orderly
Diploma of Nursing - become an enrolled nurse
Bachelor of Accounting - become an accountant
The bachelor degree will take at least three years to complete though, while the other two are between 12-18 months. This was a mess of a post. My bad. In short, I'm not happy and I'm trying to fix that.

 No.6316

what are you doing step-rifle



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