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/hikki/ - NEET / Advice

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Posting works again.

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I just found this board and couldn't feel more comfy navigating it. I'm honestly glad I found a semi-active /hikki/ board to scroll through too.

Most NEET boards I find are rlly slow or have gone defunct.

How's your day going anon?
When was the last time you went outside?
>I went outside for the first time in maybe like 5 weeks for the sole reason to get parts to fix my shitty laptop.
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Tohnochan has some of the shittiest rules I've ever seen on an imageboard. A shame, really.


>When was the last time you went outside?
a month ago

not much reason to go out again anytime soon


Hello /late/r.


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Late.city is pretty cozy, though i've heard others voice their concerns abt the slow traffic.

I highly recommend putting on a comfy podcast as some bg noise, personally helped me alot with my anxiety.

Maybe put it at a lower volume/cover one ear instead of both if you're scared someone might try to cause trouble, and remember, always carry any form of self-defense weapon.


Their rules are pretty restrictive but even so there's a lot of activity and good discussion there. I don't agree with all their rules but they have given the board a unique culture and kept the eternal september of 2016 at bay which I appreciate a lot.
Sup friend, what's your favorite(s) fizzy drink? Mine's venom killer taipan.
/late/ is slow but it's active, and it's culture is the closest I've come to finding another /doomer/ since the great exodus.

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What works depict hikikomori/shut-in characters that you found relatable?
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SHUT IN: https://store.steampowered.com/app/1438190/SHUT_IN/

A game about a shut-in, narrated by someone who really hates them. You explore their ruin of a house in order to make progress.

This one is more humorous than the other games I've mentioned here. There's a lot of black comedy.


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I liked reading through what little there is of She Doesn't Know Why She Lives. I found it really relatable to my time as an ex-shut in/neet


Damn, this is a great read. Thanks, anon. Actually cried until I felt a little better about life when she'd articulate how I've thought and felt for years, and then seeing her manage to take steps to improving her own lot in life hit hard.


yeah, I really love this series from the title to the interactions with Izumi's coworkers. If you start to talk to people irl like I've once tried to do you do eventually end up seeing that there's plenty of sad/anxious people out in the world despite them being seemingly "normal", and I like that this manga portrays that side too, it feels realistic. The mc hits so close to home sometimes that it makes me wonder what the mangaka is like to be able to write something like this, I'm glad they did.


Tomoe is literally a student, she's more an outcast than anything. I heard the manga is sort of changing the overall theme and its becoming more slice of life as she's making new friends.

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What would your life look like if you lived exactly the way you wanted to? This question is based on something that I recently thought of and I'm interested in seeing people's responses.
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i sometimes wish i could just like, hit pause on reality for a while, experience all sorts of things that i normally couldn't because society, money, time, whatever, and then unpause having gained all that experience and not aged


In my ideal life, I would be rich without working. First, I'd move out of my parent's home. Then I'd put all the bills in automatic payment, and I'd order a new PC online.
That's it. I'd be happy.


I'd be happy.

I can't think of anything else to say. Everything in the entire universe seems dull and unappealing. So in my ideal life, that wouldn't be the case?


Probably neet in my own place except in peak condition health, that's all I'd really want out of my "ideal" lifestyle.

I'd wake up tomorrow completely broke without my pc and in same position if it meant I could be my ideal version of healthy.

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In my early 20s I was a NEET for a few years before being forced to work. Back then i was a shy nerd and always had people wanting to hang out with me. Once i left neetdom I found it so hard to find companionship.

Fast forward 10 yrs later and here I am a year into neetdom again in my 30s and lonelier than ever. I was lonely before as a wagie but now its worse and I don't know how you long term neets do it.

I might have to leave the neet life and im not looking forward to it. I feel like i wasted so much time not making connections that I know having money and a job wont bring me any of it. I don't see the point going back to being a wagecuck cuz it wont fill t hat emptyness. I wish i stayed a neet back in my 20s and got a neet gf that feeling wasnt as strong as it was now.

IDK sorry for the rant
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Great, I agree that it could work then. Good luck with it, hope you the best Anon!

>lol are tulpas actually real.

That wikihow article is absolutely hilarious lol.

I've never interacted with anyone who would've had one, but they sound plausible knowing how tricky our minds can be. Seems extremely hard to achieve something like that though. All the crap about them being actually sentient and some supernatural beings and whatnot is total pseudoscience to me, however


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you'll never truly be able to escape the loneliness, because it's part of the lifestyle. the best remedy i've found for my own continued isolation is keeping my hobbies interesting to me and my time spent (relatively) meaningfully. the main enemy of a NEET is also their main perk: the endless amount of time you have. if you're able to focus on something cool, for an extended period of time, being alone for all that time isn't so bad.

>This advice is going to sound bizarre

nah, it's good advice. i think most people neglect the importance of a rich internal dialogue. i often run things, like thoughts on whatever film i just watched or anxieties about the days ahead, by my "internal voice", and i can have a kind of back-and-forth between myself and myself. it may not be as extreme as a full-on imaginary friend, but that's honestly just one step away from embracing your inner voice and actually engaging with what it has to say.


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You're welcome. Glad I could help, in some way.

I wasn't entirely sure how anons here would react to this kind of advice, so I was hesitant to label it as "you absolutely must try this". irl, people who don't suffer from anxiety tend to offer unhelpful advice, saying that you just need to be more social, interact with others more, etc. It gets pretty grating at times. This was one of the few things that helped at a time I wasn't getting therapy.

For me, I always enjoyed writing stories and creating characters. That's how I was able to personify the voices in my head- but it does take effort and time. If you don't have a lot of practice maintaining that inner world, it can be pretty daunting. But it's rewarding at the same time- like lucid dreaming while you're awake.

One thing that's important is to not go too far with it. If that imaginary friend starts berating you, or you're completely relying on them then it'll become a nightmare to deal with. You've got to integrate it with the real world, and pretend it doesn't exist when you're in public, being observed with others.

Headmates aren't really tulpas, though they're similar. I'm not sure what else to call mine- people with DiD create systems they're a part of to deal with trauma, and that's where I got the term from.
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I've been trying having an imaginary friend recently, if only because i'm exceptionally bored and enjoy experimenting with strange ideas. I haven't had much luck so far. I do intend to keep trying for a while, as consistency is king, but there've been a couple things that have been difficult for me:
1. I have trouble visualizing people, and especially faces. Also, it's hard to decide how realistic to make them, because I find real people unappealing, but I also don't want a bubblegum looking anime character.
2. No matter which personality I go with, I feel i'm always at a blank for what to make them say/do. The problem is that I don't care about anything, and imagining someone that cares about things I don't is hard.
3. It's pretty tiring.
4. It feels very LARPy, which I know is kind of the point, but I can't get the things I say in response to the imaginary person to feel natural/real or actually representative of me. Not only does it feel like i'm playing out another character in my head, but it also feels like i'm playing out myself as a character, and ideally I want it to feel more natural.

What i'd like to achieve is an independent personality in my head, sorta, that would respond automatically or comment on things automatically without much input from me. I think the ability to do this kind of thing might be related to hypnotic suggestibility, which I know is low for me.


Not him and don't have any experience on the matter, but you could start with smaller steps.
Personally been trying to start believing in a deity, even though I'm a very cynical person.
Maybe you could start with an animal, or a faceless person. Imagining someone who is more similar to you might be easier for you than imagining someone who isn't. It might also help to get some reference material for the shape or personality you want your imaginary friend to mimic.
My faith has mostly only shown when I'm in situations of high-stress or pain. Perhaps you can find a friend within you to cheer you up when you are feeling down.
The best of luck to you.

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How do you make online friends? Where did you meet yours? I'm so fucking lonely. I figured out I could ask here because none of you are going to give me shit advice like "go outside."
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I found mine by looking through LFGs on Xbox Live. Did some customs in Halo, was very quiet/nervous at first, but I slowly came out of my shell in groups that were nice to me. Did that every weekend from Dec. 2020 to last July and then I found them - the guys that would become my longtime friends. They like me and I like them. They don't make fun of my tics, they don't ban me the 1 time I go negative K/D, we just chill and play games together.
If you have a mic and a gaming platform of some kind to play on, look around. The Xbox LFGs are great, PUGs/custom lobbies on PC games etc. I advise you to avoid shitcord. There's too many people discussing too transient a topic most of the time. Making friends there is not easy. This of course assumes your nerves can handle voice chat. Don't push yourself too hard, but don't give up either. Once you form your core friends group, you'll meet their friends, and end up with a core/primary, secondary, maybe even tertiary friends circle.


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I've found a lot of nice people while playing Phantasy Star Online. Maybe not exactly "friends" because I don't talk to them outside of the game but its nice to enjoy a game with people who are just as passionate about it. But similar to >>6652 it can be very addicting so be careful if you try it.


Wanna play minecraft? I only have bedrock though


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sorry if this post seems like I'm trying to turn the thread about me, but I have to vent a little bit on this subject.
I used to have small spaces where I could talk to people and try to make friends online, but ever since I let a cancerous person into those spaces it seems he overtook everything and made friends with everyone despite not being interested at all before. It's really annoying because at the time I was too shy to actually make friends with anyone, and I've since ghosted this person and made myself totally invisible online after a certain irl incident. Every few months I'm reminded that there they are, still using people just like they used me. I wouldn't be surprised if he's just looking for a replacement "me" since they still try to send me happy birthday messages as if nothing happened years later, and seemingly took up a bunch of my old interests that they had no say in before. I can't avoid it because my interests are still niche, I feel more trapped now than before. I feel stupid for trying to share what I like and where I visit to try to gain their trust. They were a special kind of manipulative.
Sometimes I think I should just get over my fears and openly tread those spaces anyway, let my personality do the talking and just eventually ignore him if he tries to force contact again, but for some reason I can't accept that as a solution. I'm scared of what he could say about me if everyone's probably already on his side of things if I ever "come back".

tldr; don't let pushy assholes from the internet into your life even if you're extremely lonely because they will walk all over you for being too nice


How exactly did he worm his way into your groups and into the minds of your friends? Is he charismatic? Deceptive? How was your relationship with those groups and individuals before he came into the picture?

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 No.2758[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

I used to post here before but stopped after living a normal lifestyle, for a while atleast. I got fired and I've been jobless for like months now. My previous motivation to work on my personal projects and illustrations have all since diminished. I feel only apathy when playing games or watching stuff like I used to enjoy. Nowadays I just constantly press f5 on various image boards to pass time and listen to songs I've heard countless of times before already. Then I remembered this place and feel like I should share this here.

Please feel free to share your current situation here so we can feel alone togehter or some gay shit.
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Doc a few months ago said I'm either in a prodromal stage for schizophrenia, have schizoaffective disorder or have schizoid personality disorder. Of course the last option is the best outcome but they're all miserable in their own way.
Can't really say I'm too surprised now that it's all settled into my mind. Back when he first told me I had a slight mental breakdown, but now, like everything else that happened in my life, it's turned into a small whirring hum that never really leaves but doesn't cause any strong emotions one way or the other.
I've had some pretty bad cards dealt to me over my life, but this one has to be the worst just for the level of staying power. I've been mentally abused by my father, bullied through my childhood and teens, raped by one of my best friend, had a girlfriend that almost ruined the little social circle I had, and yet none of that even comes close to being diagnosed as a potential schizophrenic.
Life just kinda sucks right now and the desire to just kinda kill myself grows and grows. I don't like going outside, I don't like talking to people, I don't like consuming media, or playing games, or doing art anymore, or programming. I don't really like doing anything. It'd be more accurate to say what I tolerate the most rather than what I like the most because everything just kind of sucks. I've been NEET for about a year (minus a few months I went to college for a degree I then dropped out of), I spend my days mindlessly watching youtube, playing fighting games, and watching anime barely thinking much about anything. Then I go to bed and kinda mope and sob a little to sleep, and then I wake up and repeat the whole thing over again. It's a tortourous cycle that I can literally feel rotting away my mind, yet whenever I try to do anything about it I just end back up at square 1.
I'm starting university in september at least, not exactly in a degree I'm entirely sure I want to do, but hopefully the change of pace and the forced interactions with new people gets my brain active again where I can atleast be a high functioning manic depressive, rather than some guy who's slowly losing his mind in his room.
Sorry for the rant, I just wanted to get some things off my chest because I don't really have anyone else to talk to about them.


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I'm beginning to feel less and less like a hikikomori as the days go by, I think. I used to feel a noticeable distance between me and the outside world but its almost like that distance is dissolving now.

Maybe it's because I'm starting to interact more with others online. I don't use vc and I but I'll listen and respond sometimes over chat. I feel as though I'm losing sight of something or I've yet to realize I've already lost sight of it.


I have plenty though I feel it'd be exploitative to share them and for you to share these ancedotes on YouTube.


am doing good. recently ordered a new sleeping bag online as my old one's zipper broke after three years of constant use
i'd recommend any hiki to start sleeping in a sleeping bag rather than a bed, just cuz you don't have to deal with the hassle of wet/sweaty covers and stuff


That's… A very interesting idea.

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How do you deal with an embarrassing past?
Also, share your embarrassing past. None will beat mine.

Humiliation is hard to overcome because I feel like I'm a trash human being, I'm constantly afraid that people will see my past in the afterlife and see all the humiliating things that happened to me and cringe. I can't be friends with them because I feel unworthy of their friendship.

I was a special ed student at 5 years old, spent all my youth with disabled people, they would lock me up in a padded room with no light when I misbehaved anyhow or didn't listen to the teacher.
I went to normal school after that and the teacher refused to let me use the bathroom, I peed my pants in front of the whole class and was bullied for 3 years over it.
I was bullied in 3 different schools because I had been sheltered and spoiled by my parents who thought they had a "special son".
I was beaten by bullies, isolated, humiliated, and had no friends for years.
I became bitter and angry and joined the chans, which fucked me up even more with gore videos and whatnot.
My parents left me to rot as a NEET for years to take care of my sisters and never paid attention to me.
I know my dad and mom hate me secretly and prefer my two sisters who are neurotypical.
I was an autistic retard, my whole youth. I can't overcome that and become someone I'm not. I will always be a retard.
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You deserve better. I wish that someday you no longer want to die.


i dont want to share but i feel taht way too, like im messed up for life i really just want to die!!!!!


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The state of American public schools is a very understated yet critical issue in that country, even among "dissident" forums such as imageboards. I don't think it's really been grounded into people who were subject to this system how it effected their childhoods and adolescence.


Nevermind my embarrassing past; Let's talk about my embarrassing present; Let's talk about my embarrassing future!

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 No.2367[Reply][Last 50 Posts]

What are your MBTI types, /hikki/ ?

I recommend taking a few different tests and understanding what each letter means. I'm also guessing that most people here are INxx

Some people discredit MBTI, but I think if you treat it a a rough guideline, it can offer some good insights to yourself and others.

INTP wasted-potential masterrace reporting in
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Glad to see all the other INFPs, I love you all. Life sucks doesn't it?


intp-t. typing is nonsense though, you will never get a solid result due to the inherent lack of a single, rigid personality in people. it can be even further complicated by psychological shit like multiplicity.


INTP-A here. op's pic related pretty much sums up what everyday feels like.
when socialization and empathy doesn't happen automatically you really feel how little in common everyone has


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INTP is the worst personality type to have. It makes your life so much more difficult, not twice as hard more like you're fucked beyond belief.

You are always thinking about living in an ideal world but never actually living in the world you are in now. You're good with theoretical concepts but inept when it comes to practical application of knowledge. This basically makes you incapable of doing most tasks or you do them poorly. You can't stand being around other people but are forced to accept the fact that you can't entirely avoid them.

It's fucking exhausting being alive.


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First year I took this test I think I got ISTJ or INTJ. For the next half-decade it was ISTP. Now that I take it again I got INTP (and INFP once that I tried not get to me because this is just a secular zodiac test). The amount of INFPs on imageboards or at least /hikki9kdoomerNEET/ boards explains a lot of the behavior I loathe. The more accurate way to know what type you are is to read the descriptions of the 8 or 10 categories, and be honest with yourself on who you are at the moment, the whole thing reminds me of the Deus Ex AI conversation..
>Wishes there was a war to kill people who have more feelings than him. Good reflexes help him dodge responsibility.
That's me.

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From my past experiences and casual observation, I came to a conclusion about why people have friends. There's two reasons: entertainment, and validation. I've seen a lot of this myself from my own friendships. I haven't had many, so I can list them all pretty easily.

Michael 1: I met him on the bus on my first day of kindergarten. He sat next to me and that was all it took to form some kind of bond between us. By some luck, we happened to have the same class for all of the pre-grade years. One time, I saw him talking to a girl for a long time during recess and started running around teasing him about it. At the end of the day I apologized and he started going on about wanting to marry her one day. Okay. As soon as first grade started, we were placed in different classrooms. I was worried about it and rightfully so. We immediately started talking way less. As soon as I moved that was the end of our relationship. There was little to no goodbye and I had no way of keeping in touch. Who knows if he remembers me.

Annie: Annie was another school friend I had before I moved. She's the only girl I have ever been real friends with. She had kind of childish tastes even for that age and made me play ring around the rosy with her. After a bunch of boys who I already didn't like started teasing me about it, I started giving her the cold shoulder and eventually she got pissed off at me. That was how our relationship was left off. There was no real conclusion. I still regret it, but here's the thing. It wouldn't have made any difference if I had left on good note with her. It's not like there's any way we could have stayed in touch. Phone numbers were beyond me at the time. Even then it would fizzle. It's just one of those totally inconsequential things.

Michael 2: Michael 2 is where things start getting more interesting. Michael lived across the street and he was an odd character. He was a blond, classic Americana kind of boy, except he has this weird sadistic/violent streak in him. We would always play soccer together against each other's sisters and we would always win. He would then treat me to Gatorade after every game and the whole deal. He was obsessed with this wrestling game and naturally I wanted to play it with him just because of that. The more sociopathic side of him came out sometimes though. One time while he was riding his bike across the street and passing me, he flipped me off because he was mad about something. Another timPost too long. Click here to view the full text.
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>I definitely don't buy into that. Maybe close relationships are important to health, but I already do lots of unhealthy things on a regular basis. I'm not going to force myself.

>That's a pretty negative way to describe inner-monologging.

Well, I think it's the most truthful way to describe it, because that's essentially what it is.

>People should be thinking to themselves regardless of how much feedback they get from other people. It's not a bad thing.

You're right, it's not inherently a bad thing.

>I don't really see how the necessity for outside input necessarily connects to consistent relationships. I don't think you need one for the other. Even a book can provide outside influence. You're still intaking new information that comes from another person.

The fact is, you can tell yourself that that's how it is, but your brain still knows exactly what it wants, and if it wants deep and personal relationships with others then it will make you severely depressed, anxious and give you a mental hell until you get it what it wants - no matter how much you tell yourself that you can get everything you need from a book.

A book is quite simply not the same as socializing because it's not interactive, there's no back-and-forth exchange of ideas for both parties to affirm or challenge, imageboards, or writing letters or emails are things that more or less resemble socializing.

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Yeah, i'm fine with dying sooner. It's not worth it.
>You're asking to be able treat a relationship casually while getting total conviction from the other person
I already said twice that that's not what i'm asking for. I don't even know what you mean by treating a relationship casually. I don't make those kinds of distinctions. A relationship is just a relationship to me.
>the other people you deal with also have to bend over
How? How did I ever make people bend over for me? They say something to me, and I always listened and responded. That's it. Even if they didn't say anything to me, I would still opt to be around them. They could just be silent the whole time and I would be fine with that as long as they responded to me. Maybe i'd be confused.
>But it's necessary for both parties to put themselves out there
I never complained about how people establish relationships. Sure, you have to put yourself out there. My problem is with how you have to keep putting yourself out, and keep jingling keys in their face so they don't turn away. I think relationships should be binary and perpetual. Once it is created, unless there is some very good reason for it to end, it remains. Forever, and in the same state. That it what I want. I want somebody with no spines. I don't want to waste energy playing touch and go and getting pricked. I don't want to deal with that, even if it's detrimental to my health.


>I was too dull and quiet to entertain anybody for long. Too dull to give your cellphone number to. To dull to stick around with. I was thrown out like a used tissue. I'm not making this thread because i'm bitter towards one person, i'm making it see if anybody else can see what I see. I'd like to hear about any similar experiences.
Thanks for relating your experiences, OP. I can see things like that too, but at the moment I do not want to type it all up. Too much thinking.


I really, really like the contents of this thread. That is all.


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I found this whole thread to be extremely relatable. My friendships throughout my life have been very similar to yours, OP. Even if I spent hours talking to someone, at some point they would get bored of me and we'd just stop talking. If not that, then they end up hating me for whatever reason, they get sick of me, and I never usually find out what it is I did wrong. This has been a repeating cycle in my life. One of the best examples I can think of is a girl I knew from primary school messaged me on Facebook a few years back and we started talking again. We spoke for a month or so, before eventually she started giving me dismissive short responses, or just didn't respond at all. Then someone else I knew at the time messaged me about her, and showed me that she was now talking to him the same way she did to me. I simply stopped being entertaining to her and she latched onto the next guy who would give her attention. I don't understand how you can just drop someone from your life because you're bored with them, like they're a toy you don't want to play with anymore. I will never really understand neurotypicals and their sociopathic way of thinking.

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If I'm successful financially, I think I might create a NEET house, as a safe space where NEETs can move out of their parents house, become a virtuoso of what they're passionate about, and/or be counseled on how to actually succeed at life. Eventually though, they will have to either use what they've learned to get a job and move out, or contribute to the household (I suspect it'd mostly be the later, since it's the safer option).

What do you think? Can someone learn to not be a leech on society in an environment like this, or would this inevitably reinforce their dependence on others? Would you be comfortable moving to such a place full of NEET strangers, even if shit hit the fan?
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>isolated shithole town
Sounds comfy. I live in a big city and I'm miserable. I wish I could move to some bumfuck hick town and live in some cabin in the woods away from society


living alone in privacy somewhere in the woods sounds cozy but the thought of needing a ride every time to go to town for groceries or necessities kills the neet. Comfy without having to run into people but also within walkable distance to stores is a good balance to me personally


I'd take advantage of your generosity anon, 99% of us would because we wouldn't be able to help it. You can't just stick a bunch of dysfunctional people in halfway home and expect meaningful things to come of it. If I'm a depressed, reclusive chud and my roomies are depressed, reclusive chuds, it's going to turn into a game where we inevitably avoid one another as often as possible because none of us want to roll the dice with burdensome social interactions.


This would be great
I've dreamt of this for a while
But I keep end up failing in life and dropping out of things
But I'll try and remember to come back here later at some point


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I used to think this was a good idea, and it is in a systemic sense. But as an individual I would advise you to focus on building general community and yourself up more. The sort of care that NEETs and Hikkis need takes a diligent village of mature people at minimum, and likely prolonged support from broader society. We are unfortunately a symptom of grand cultural problems that I don't want to bring up in this thread.
The solution is an equally grand systemic effort grounded in empathy to help us. I am a NEET who thanks to luck has gained some financial means over the past years, but nevertheless still lives at home. I have at various points given money to other NEETs. Even so, material support has yielded little results other than temporary happiness for recipients, which, while welcome, is not a solution.
I think a NEET house could work in principle if it was run and maintained by NEETs seeking a better life. The issue is that it requires non-NEETs to set up initially and be maintained for some indeterminate amount of time. Considering the highly volatile mental health conditions of many NEETs this is a job that simply requires more than 1 person, perhaps a particularly remarkable person could pull it off alone, and if that's you by all means, but it's not me, and it's not a lot of people.
If you're going to do it I wish you luck, but you are more likely to be successful if you get at least another person or two for support to establish a NEEThouse with. I do not wish for you to undergo the same emotional abuse at the hands of other NEETs that I have while trying to reach out and help. I provided more than money, I also provided a shoulder to cry on and a safe space. This backfired horribly as I'm not emotionally equipped to handle the abusive behaviors of other NEETs even though I empathize with their struggle deeply. This is something that would ideally involve some kind of trained mental health crises team, therapists, etc. Not to imply the mental health system always has the right answers, it doesn't, but in some cases some approaches can be helpful.

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