/hikki/ - NEET / Advice

>>9401
if you already went through male puberty then looking too much like a woman isn't ever going to be a problem you have to worry about lol

>>9403
you are right but being perceived as a femboy or a trans woman rather than someone who is androgynous is not something I wish for tbh

>>9401
I experience the complete opposite, I'm a trans woman on hrt but people perceive me as non-binary instead

>>9397
non binary afabs have only 2 paths: look like a young twink or be seen as a cis woman unfortunately.

>>9406
Don't forget the shoujo twink prince type

>>9407
thats literally just a yugioh character

>>9408
all yugioh characters are non binary twinktruuns at this point :P

>>9283
looks like jadeyanh
literally her

>>9414
idk who that is, anon

would you truun for your hairline?

Is it true that I should boof progesterone? I think Powers has said that its better but like… anal???

>>9437
so let me get this straight: you want to be a tranny which is the most degenerate type of faggot, but you are too good to put something up your ass? cmon…

for what its worth prog is very much totally random if it works or not.

>>9435
I did this.

>>9435
i am doing this right now
and to reduce facial and body hair

>>9450
you are highly based.

>>9459
cool story bro

>>9461
this tbh
i wish sei made an /lgbt/ board before she left

>>9463
to add to this
i'm not neet but i am trans, and hence would have liked a board dedicated to lgbt topics in general

>>9250
You look like peewee herman in drag but somehow you're really cute.

I've been an SA victim since I was 3. It's always been happening to me in some way shape or form. It's made me hate myself. Then puberty hit and it just got so much worse. I fumbled patriarchal masculinity. You've heard it all before. I transitioned and I love what I have but I can't help shake that need to hate myself for whats happened to me. Even in queer spaces I frequently get touched against my will and I feel like there's no way I'll ever escape being an object that's just going to be touched against its will all the time. All the while the government is trying to criminalize our existence. i just wanna stop being a victim. I wanna live in peace, feminize my body and be left the fuck alone. It's all so unfair.

>>9504
same poster

Everyone else I talk to about this either says it was God's Plan for me to always be so unhappy with myself for what happened to me and that transitioning took it too far and I just want to shove my fist in their fucking face for saying my repeated rape is part of some grand fucking plan to put me in my place. What a fucking cruel joke. What lesson am I meant to learn from all this? "Don't be yourself or you'll get raped?" I'm tired. Existentially, Emotionally, Physically. I don't even pass. I just look like a traumatized pervert. It's not like I like the way I look trying to present male either. Facial and body hair will always make me dysphoric. I love the things e has given me, but to become a total butterface after doing all this to cope with being a rape victim is just so cruel and unfair.

>>9505
you are trying to present as a woman?

my mind presented me w a trvthnvke the other day and i cant seem to resolve it. everyone knows nerdy japs indulge in loli bullshit bc its the most accessible way for them to express repressed feminine traits. this likely includes a lot of repressing trans ppl. does this mean trans ppl have a tendency to resort to pedophilia as an outlet if they cant come out?

>>9510
The.






theeeee

the the

the the the te t te

the tetetete tete te tete THE THE THE THE

THE THE THE THETHE THE THE THETHE
THE THE THE *TAB S FURIOUSLY* DABADI DABADAI DABAGIDI DABADAI DABADII DABADAI DABADI BAGAIDA

>>9581
THIS. look at how every "gay rights progressive yada yada" kiddy diddler lolcow has unkempt hair and a repper beard

so troon out sped

>>9581
Explain to me how liking loli = closeted transsexualism?
Is it because you think liking flat chests means they're closeted homosexuals? I think Japanese men who are in the tranny closet are more likely to express themselves by cosplaying female anime characters.
Loli's more about liking girls in their purest, most adorable form. I do think lolicons are weak men who tend to be more feminine, but they're not trannies who're in desperate need of dick. They just want to cuddle and molest something smaller than them.

>>9581
change yo resolver!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Every time I come back to chan spaces like this I get more and more disgusted. Its getting harder to comb through threads of idealized anime versions of women bc it comes off less endearing than before and seems like just overt sexualization, I think tranny brain might be taking over for me atp. I would le go back but for some reason I keep thinking of an idealized, imaginary tumblr version of chan spaces where repressed men post moe art and I yearn to see that for some reason. I guess I'm attempting to find some nonexistent synthesis of my past and my present where men act like kurt cobain and aren't ftms that are actively becoming more malebrained and dudebroish. It doesn't exist and that just makes me realize how alone I really am, most people either stop boymoding and stop being toxic or continue being toxic and repressed. I'm in a specific situation where I may lessen dysphoria if I just repress for a while longer. The plight of the eternal manmoder or something

A friend told me a few days ago that i shouldnt be so hard on myself and asked me what do i dislike about myself other than gender stuff, and while there are things that i dislike all of them seem to be somehow related to gender, my body, my voice, my face…

It makes me think that estrogen is this kind of saviour that would improve my life so much but that just feels incorrect, idk i just wish i had a boyfriend or girlfriend, that also sounds like something that would help me so much.

If anyone has similar experiences i would love to hear you out

this >>9250 anon here
i constantly think about this >>9251 post
you just don't get it and i think the best way to describe why i ``doompost'' so much is this excerpt from notes from the underground
i truly do suffer from not passing, but instead of accepting it with grace i'm insufferable for it

>>9743
i DONT care bruh

>>9744
i know, but i will continue to bray and stamp my feet over my predicament out of spite

>>9743
where is that excerpt from?

>>9743
From the images you posted, you just look like a woman, idk. If someone thinks you're not, it must be your voice or something. Either that, or you have some odd thoughts about what women should look like. You don't look like some hollywood star or model, you just look like a normal woman. Really pretty actually. Do you not like your smile though? I had a phase where I wouldn't smile in photos either because my smile is crooked, but I've come to see it as endearing in its own right. I didn't bother with taking care of my split ends and proper hair care and avoided shopping, but I've grown more interested in that stuff and thrifting lately and it really helped me with my confidence in my looks as well.
>>9250
>getting old and fat compared to when i was younger
People normally get old and fat over the years. Normal part of life. My high school crush got kinda fat over the last few years and got some early wrinkles and I haven't been crushing on her any less but she's still happily married with someone who isn't me but damn do I wish it was me… Anyway, you don't even look fat and you don't look old either, you look like a young woman.
>waah I'm a genetic abomination
What the hell are you even talking about
>my clockableness makes me unemployable
Are you sure they can even tell? In photos, you certainly pass, so I guess it'd have to happen at the interview stage.
>>>9743
>i truly suffer from not passing
Maybe you have some kind of dysmorphia where you see yourself differently from how you look like to other people. I hope you have a good therapist you can bring that up with
>>9821
She wrote "this excerpt from Notes from the Underground" (it's a novella by Dostoyevsky) in that very post, or did you mean to ask which chapter that excerpt is from?

>>9849
>If someone thinks you're not, it must be your voice or something.
i get clocked without speaking or even moving
>Are you sure they can even tell?
they can always tell
>>9821
notes from the underground - dostoevsky

>>9655
>chan spaces start to disgust me
>sexualised anime girls everywhere
>yearn for non-sexualised endearing moe
>I think tranny brain might be taking over for me
That's women brained tbh.
As a straight woman browsing altchans, I am annoyed to see so many depictions of lolis and teenage moe girls who talk like babies being sexualised while I get almost zero ikemen content (not even asking for handsome ojisans, but where are the anime boy twinks that don't look like moe girls, huh?).
The ecchi boards in most chan spaces either don't have men at all and if they do, it's just shotas and femboys. Always goes back to these damn underage girl ecchi drawings everywhere. It doesn't even upset me morally, they're just drawings, but it irks me aesthetically, do you wanna see old man hairy bara boobshots if it's not your taste? Imagine seeing that everywhere. Are there not enough people attracted to men in chan spaces? Are people not into the cute man ecchi I'm into? Or are they just posting less about it? I know there's more ikemen content on dedicated boards, but almost every off-topic board that isn't specifically for that is full of lolis.
(I still have fujochan at least but most altchans are not that (not even regular straight women content has much of the sub men I like specifically tbh because femdom for women is hard to find much of, they're all reading BL instead so I do too. I just wish fujochan wasn't transphobic)).
I get it if your loli drawing is just a funny reaction image that's supposed to be you, but why are men posting little girls as reaction images anyway, what's up with that, do they not identify with the images they're posting? (Yes, I know they post them because they're cute, but women don't typically post cute men as reaction images now do they). I get if they're women posting chibis (like mehera/the boymoder, she's fine) or furries posting their fursonas, or men posting wojacs or whatever or something established like Pepe the frog, Madotsuki and Yotsuba. Maybe these lolis are like established pepes and other people throw sexualised art in between regular old reaction images, maybe that's it, I'm probably just reading too much into it…

>>9885
Maybe I'm just irked that there aren't more cute boys and men being posted on altchans.

>>9885
Trying to get rid of lolicons on loosely moderated imageboards is a fool's errand. The last time I tried to push a single lolicon post off a board the board in question got spammed to hell multiple times, I was being gaslit and emotionally manipulated in DMs multiple times a day and small groups of users were actively organizing a riot against me for daring to call their actions not universally loved and morally sound. It's on the level of attempting to understand soylent wojak people. My current theory is that it has more to do with the country and culture of origin for the lolicons than the general board culture itself. But many board openly provide platforms for them to spread their legs, yes.

The second part of your post comes off as written in particularly bad faith. Notably, the idea to call certain media "for [X] gender only" based on vibes is ridiculous to me. I would be very careful of calling people out for not following the mainstream (even more so on the unarguably underground corner of the web) and established norms in regards to their sex/gender. Your post smells the same as seniors yelling that girls shouldn't be in science or politics "because girls didn't do that when I was young?!"

>while I get almost zero ikemen content
I welcome you to be the hero you look up to, you can definitely find a place to bathe in cool and loving men, likely even here.

I would recommend not starting the lolicon debate ITT

Seagal, can you finally un-sticky this shit please?

>>10064
I wish I could delete this absolute mess of a thread.

I have said in the past that I oppose the existence of this thread simply because I don't consider anonymous IBs to be the right place to have a thread for this kinda thing, as its a very sensitive topic for the users that identify as <insert identity here> when places you can actually keep it friendly and even create your own sheltered community like Discord or Facebook are available, in Anonymous IBs you are unnecessarily exposed.

It exposes the users and it exposes the site to outsiders who hate this particular identity (though it could be any identity, if I created a thread about any identity or sexuality and it would be a mess too)

The problem is, I am respecting the previous Admin's wishes to keep it up, without Seisatsu this IB would have been discontinued many years ago.

I am convinced that this thread exposes the users it claims to represent to unnecessary hostilities.

For a disclaimer, I am not any flavor of LGBT or whatever either, and I don't know the first thing about transgenderism other than a quick google search tells me, so I am even less competent to moderate it as I don't really know what are the lines between genuine criticism and trolling.

But a deal is a deal. Please, if you have any further comments or suggestions, let me know in sugg, I don't want to derail this catastrophe even further.

>>9378
Honestly same except I've always been this fucked up

Well, seeing as the new management has been mystically repelled by the power of your collective annoyingness, time to bump the thread to annoy all the wannabe oldshit larpers.

Obviously, it's better to repress than be an ugly orc hon, but what about putting in the effort and money for skincare, body shaving, hair removal etc? Is it better to obsess over that and actually have a chance at making it, or is it better to simply repress and save the effort? I think it sounds scary to have to put in all that effort; you'd fall into a fairly obsessive-compulsive mindset pretty quickly, or maybe I'm projecting. What do you guys think? (i speak as a non-tranny)

>>10070
believe it or not it is actually possible to have a healthy relationship with societal beauty standards even if you are a hon.

i've been transitioning longer than this website has existed, i've seen everything.

you need to be doing it for you. sometimes i can keep up with skincare, sometimes i cant.

yea there are days i think im ugly (although i do pass relatively well, but because i stopped presenting high femme i sabotage my own passability because i actually prefer to look butch), but there are days where i think i am the sexiest thing on the planet.

those standards that are forced on us by people outside of us. i am not saying they dont have material consequences, but you can still choose how you navigate it, and i find generally speaking, it is healthier to do what you are able for yourself, hon or not.

i find there to be little reason to not do things for your appearance even if the results aren't exactly as you might want. if other people make it your problem, make it their problem.

then again im an ex hikki who stopped needing to post on this board over a decade ago so i dont have any reason to believe people on this board can instantly grow the spine necessary to actually stand up for themselves. but if you can manage it, it is worth doing.

>>10072
i'm the hairiest man alive and i'd rather kill myself than rape everyone around me by trooning

my mother gets angry at me for shaving my legs anyway so there's really not much point

it sucks though

i couldn't concentrate during a cs match because i was aware that my ankles were exposed

life is hell

>>10075
i know you're suffering but you need to move away from your family. you *can* do enough to your appearance to at least reasonably signal to everyone around you how you identify without "raping" everyone around you. there *are* ways to manage your hair and hormones go a long way.

no reasonable person thinks that way about trans people as long as you make *some* attempt to transition.

>>10076
i'm being melodramatic. angry is the wrong word. she just sort of laughs at me and stares at me pitifully, so i stopped doin it. she's one of those pseudo-progressive "feminist" millennial types who think that any desire for beauty has been implanted by the propaganda of the cosmetics industry or whatever. which doesn't make any fucking sense given i'm a guy, but oh well. plus, i'm way too poor for a po box, and i'm terrified of needles, so overpriced gel is the only option.

i don't actually know if i'm even a tranny or just a lonely sad agp narcissist.

i don't really see the point in going towards becoming a girl if it'll take so much effort, and i'll never look how i want anyway, so why go halfway and risk ruining my life further? this isn't me going "oh boo hoo give me attention", at least not deliberately, i'm just pragmatically asking what the point is.

i guess i probably do need to get away from my family, just because i've been stuck with them all the time, but i have literally no friends or confidants. i'm basically the biggest loser alive :P

>>10077
thank you for being real with me, i know its hard, but even if you dont look how you want its worth it.

truthfully, nobody looks how they want to.

but you deserve to feel at least the way everyone else does. nobodies life is perfect, but its worth trying to improve it.

i wish i knew how to tell you to make friends, but i got very lucky in terms of how i left hikkidom. i met online friends and not everyone can do that.

>>10065
Can you at least un-sticky it?