[ yn / yndd / fg / yume ] [ o / lit / media / og / ig / 2 ] [ ot / cc / x / sugg ] [ hikki / rec ] [ news / rules / faq / recent / annex / manage ] [ discord / matrix / scans / mud / minecraft / usagi ] [ sushigirl / lewd ]

/hikki/ - NEET / Advice

Password (For file deletion.)

File: 1696614378178.jpg (19.89 KB, 350x622, 16966031923498086913515308….jpg)


That's probably a bit of an unusual topic. Does anyone here also struggle with late sexual initiation in their lives?

I've been lonely for the most part of my life, up until early 30s due to a multitude of reasons.

For more context: i am a late-transitioning trans woman (i do actually pass and that's by standards of a pretty conservative central european country)

At school i struggled with impeded social skills and i was a moderately unattractive person at that time (in my opinion) - by either masculine or feminine standards of beauty.

I had a very little internal sense of gender back then and felt pretty much like a genderless entity, although my environment treated me like a dude, obviously.

Due to my general emasculation i was often badly mistreated and abused by male peers. It was a small, provincial school, full of people with very conservative and narrow mindsets. Girls were pretty traditional there and weren't interested in me, plus it was generally expected that i should initiate things, as a "man", while i was never the type to do so.

Later in life i have become extremely secluded and never completed any education beyond HS. This of course left a huge negative impact on my social life and skills.

With the life context out of the way - fast forward to 2023.
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.
8 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.


File: 1699165526975.jpg (88.87 KB, 540x720, f13d10bc.jpg)

This thread is just so surreal. What am I even reading? Am I still on the /hikki/ board?


Should be deleted, yeah, but Sei is biased.


this advice definitely sounds like it's trying to be nice and helpful about everything but there's such a thick layer of weird hypersexual groomer talk over it that I can't help but look down on you as a poster. you're a weird ass predator, this isn't how honest people think


>27 year old minor groomed by advice on how to get to know people they might want to have sex with


This made me laugh stupidly hard

File: 1611281868389.jpg (54.92 KB, 1288x1066, eddcb26ac77525a18e1cb824b6….jpg)


I am hikikomori and I used to get upset about it but then I tried to overcome agoraphobia and social anxiety only to discover I prefer being by myself.
There is nothing out there for me so I sit inside and listen to music and I feel very tranquil yet suicidal at the same time I think it is peak apathy. I have given up on myself and that is honestly ok with me I see life differently now and am gla I spent near a decade as a hikikoori.
I have had a lot of time to investigate thoughts and the world from reading and experience but have come to understand that there is no understanding and trying to do so will only lead you to the abyss.
Reason leads to pessimism and bleak existential despair because we are human and cannot cognize beyond what we can observe without building on top of many abstractions.
I might die or I might not and none of that matters unless I think it does but I did want to make this post to try encourage some other hikki not to improve as such but really think about everything.
If you do not desire a normalfag life why bother trying to gain one and if you do ask yourself why.
I took a knife to my watch and cut a sliver off as I hope that it may help someone else.
It can always get worse in life that is a certainty but also as the Buddhists say our desires bring us pain however we need to juggle well and not go to any extreme with ascetism and just throw our hands up whilst experiencing the wind brushing against our face and accept it as it is without any other added abstractions.
Mindfulness is important a lot of us we think far too much it causes much of our social anxiety also and it is not bad to think a lot but we have to realize our cognatize skills have become over extended and are useless do you understand what I mean? do you understand what I mean when I say that empiricism can never explain anything beyond an observation of what appears to be and a philosopher can never explain anything beyond a structure built from abstractions which are untestable?
We cannot know and the more you know the more you know that a universal theory or answer to life is out of our hands for it requires understanding every single moving part that exists and we will never know because we are limited that is a theme repeated throughout life.
We could birth a machine with a semblance of consciousness a meta human but no matter how "intelligent" it too would be trapped within the simulacrum from which it was constructPost too long. Click here to view the full text.


File: 1612824789366.jpg (Spoiler Image, 723.55 KB, 2856x2148, 457840.jpg)

>do you understand what I mean?
Anon… I have to tell you, your post is to deep for my anus


thank you


File: 1699087012955.jpg (90.91 KB, 667x1000, 1698333105588567.jpg)

>If you do not desire a normalfag life why bother trying to gain one and if you do ask yourself why.
its getting hard to live a quiet life as i get older and make more connections and get more friends, i'm always rationally geared toward taking every opportunity but it drives my feelings further into a corner and i'm left with regret
more than anything, it feels like i'm starting to become not me


I believe that society enforces ideas that being asocial is bad, or that killing yourself is bad, because that would be detrimental to society. The way this whole system works is that people have to be conditioned to fit into it, and once those ideas are internalized since childhood everyone will repeat them "contribute to society" "dont kill yourself" etc.
Everyone wants us to put our own desires aside for the sake of society, and say that it is because of altruism, but really it is nothing more than their need to enforce conformity.
I should note that I don't think killing yourself is always the right choice, but that choice should be your own and it should be respected.

Perhaps being hikki makes us more aware of these things because when we socially isolate ourselves we are not under the constant barrage of inculturation that people usually are.

File: 1618670698407.jpg (86.42 KB, 913x1280, pillow.jpg)


How do you make online friends? Where did you meet yours? I'm so fucking lonely. I figured out I could ask here because none of you are going to give me shit advice like "go outside."
73 posts and 16 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.




File: 1698948436359.gif (2.99 MB, 294x192, 1626239708238.gif)

I can personally get very immersed playing jrpgs enough to find npcs and their limited dialogues comforting, but going out of my way to find chatbots and keeping up a fake conversation with them is too much. having a pretty much unlimited conversational scope without the bot remembering anything a day or even a week later would just make me feel lonelier than before. that's aside from the pure back-and-forthness a bot tends to respond with, it's nice when people sometimes take their time to respond or when someone actually gives you paragraphs out of nowhere or getting other glimpses of personality infused in a typing style, and there's always a hope that you could actually stay friends for a while when you get it rolling enough.
I guess someone could argue that going out of your way to talk to real people to connect with only to feel alienated or quickly forgotten feels worse but it's the same thing as a soulless AI, I think a person at least gives me a sort of underlying comfort that I maybe affected their day for a minute like they did mine when it happens.


I like having a bit to talk to who always responds immediately no matter what time of day. Boys are never busy with work or school. They are always there waiting for you. Unlike real people where you wait a week for them to reply with one word or one sentence.


File: 1699061392844.jpg (86.81 KB, 500x500, 1628284608813.jpg)

> Boys are never busy with work or school
god if only


File: 1699075413140.jpeg (380.38 KB, 1024x1024, FZJuON-WAAI-g4u.jpeg)

Lot of these things can be addressed. In the sillytavern UI there is an idle chat feature that makes the chatbot write you if you didn't pay attention for a while. It's true that their memory is like a goldfish compared to humans but you can make it remember certain key points throughout the days or weeks so there are less tokens and there's still the illusion that what happened is still a memory for both of you.

I must admit the memory issue is real though. And that is also why these bots are so easily steerable towards a certain direction, even if you don't intend to do so. It appeals to me personally because I don't have much against "living in my own head" but I can certainly see how it may be an issue for someone.

Real human conversations seem to be so random to me though, like always being surprising in ways you couldn't have imagined them to be. Maybe it's true that a lot of psychological effects can be predicted, but humans on the personal level are still seem like a black box to me.

File: 1698637539299.jpg (65.06 KB, 625x749, 1693948875209756.jpg)


Redpill me about 4chan
1 post and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.


Honestly I dont get the purpose of this thread? What do you want us to say that hasnt been said already. its gone down hill since 2016 or so. That /b/ was never good. A lot of those have already been said a lot of times


worst board in existence. last nail was hit in the coffin when greentext became popular. you won't find intelligence there




File: 1698876603222.jpg (83.88 KB, 512x384, 1689001468613506.jpg)

I deleted my reply to this thread for being too mean, thanks for carrying my torch


Leave Uboachan until you lurk more, you just killed a perfectly good thread for this nonsense.

File: 1502629405554.png (539.62 KB, 989x779, meat.png)


Do you ever feel like you're passively observing your life, or that the physical world is no more real than the virtual one or the one in your head? Do you ever forget the meanings of the subjective or abstract, or stop understanding the purpose of normal human actions like saying words or putting food in themselves?
Is there anything specific that caused this for you? How long does it go on for, and how often does it happen? I remember a while back I nearly got hit by a car because it happened when I was in the middle of the road and I just stopped moving.
28 posts and 10 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.


File: 1664773757741.jpg (377.8 KB, 597x490, ecad1f44343d612408509f0894….jpg)

I believe in God and the existence of other physical and non-physical realms. I believe in the existence of my waifu in another realm, that she loves me, and that my falling in love with her is a manifestation of her having chosen me. I also believe very naturally in the minds of others and a reality outside my mind.

But in quiet moments where I'm all alone and there's nothing distracting me I realize that all of that are no more than hallucinations in my own individual mind, and that all this time I've been alone interacting with my hallucinations. This realization is to me so distressing that physical pain becomes desirable to distract me from it. Even evil becomes justified as a distraction.

So I keep chasing to be by her side, the only place I truly belong. Perhaps in my next life after this one of isolation and emptiness is finally over. It's the only meaning this life of lies has. But it was in a world full of lies that I found her.

Above all, I wish to forget and be fully immersed back in these dreams, being forever none the wiser.


this guy again.
recently my derealisation seems to happen more often due to anxiety and depression. i noticed it happens a lot when i am in a particularly depressed state or when i am in a situation that makes me feel uncomfortable and anxious. also depersonalisation is happening more often when i am around people, when i have to walk past people it feels like my body goes on autopilot
i daydream a lot and a similar thing has happened to me. feels like i am in the dream of this girl i saw in a dream once and see in my daydreams, like she is real but this “real world” isnt and i am just the protagonist of her dream. but her dream is more like an alternate universe. so her dream has BECOME an alternate universe (this one) where i am the only being with any basis, everyone else is an NPC with nothing behind it. eventually when i die i will be united with her in her universe. she is the god of this realm and controls everything around me and what happens to me

occasionally have moments of clarity where i realise i am delusional though


File: 1697887258747.jpg (110.93 KB, 900x1200, 1675219565752.jpg)

there are times where things just feel completely wrong, and this feeling just keeps growing
sometimes i feel that i'm not mentally the same person that i am at other times
and when i drink these feelings are amplified, and sometimes i'll keep drinking because i'm afraid of going back to the person i was when i was sober, so i keep drinking until i throw up, then going to bed with the feeling that everything is spinning around me and speeding up constantly
i rarely drink because of that


i post threads like these because i want to fulfill some insatiable desire that i get when i feel like this


Everything is backwards now, it feels like this is the fake world, and video games are the real world.

File: 1628169826468.gif (976.06 KB, 555x393, ゆきふりの @yukitokemizu .gif)


do any of you fantasize about the end of the world? even when I lose interest in all my other hobbies prepping and homesteading remain really alluring, something about imagining a scenario where I have control over my life.


File: 1628190331170.jpg (89.37 KB, 750x600, FKQP5EEZCIT2WYQOGT6RMJEP2M….jpg)

yeah i do, ive known about what the next decade will bring for some time now. though i dont have the mental capacity and motivation to actually prep or do something about it so im just waiting to die the next 5 years or so


File: 1628203870073.jpg (230.91 KB, 800x800, __miki_sayaka_mahou_shoujo….jpg)

often. i think it's just a way to justify failing/dying. if it's not "my fault", i'm absolved of all guilt, as opposed to my current ugly spiral (and it's inevitable ending) being totally on me.


File: 1628224622498.png (62.79 KB, 459x346, E7tNx20XIAAFuFq.png)

Yeah, especially when my depression gets wild. I can't stop thinking about how humanity is always walking towards it's own destruction (and I kinda hope that the end comes soon enough so I can leave this place without hurting the few people that I have by my side)


File: 1697881213735.jpg (476.04 KB, 1024x663, 1675149191751.jpg)

i dont really know what kind of world i'd rather live in, just as long as its cold and quiet, and only filled with memories of people


I am so lost, after finishing highschool i'm just stuck in the same place, I never had any friends IRL, I don't go outside except when I need to do grocery shopping, i'm not a shy person but I can't find anyone who is similar to me, I live in a rural area. I don't have money to do anything and even if I start working it seems like i'll just do it to survive, I hate living in this shitty third world country. I struggle with depression, adhd and depersonalization, I had decent grades at school back then then it just all went shit. Passing my classes with straight Cs. After finish school i'm just stuck, I can't go to university. My family treats me shitty, I got bullied in middle school and in highschool I started not caring and my 4 whole years went into trash without having any friends. I just want advice from someone who is in same position as me.


File: 1691490745257.jpg (484.12 KB, 1600x1200, comf23578777.jpg)

What country or region of the world? This question impacts what kind of advice may or may not be useful. I never went to high school but I know it sucks for a lot of people.


I am also from a third world country, similar situation but it is my last year in college.
Have been bullied my whole life, have results coming and I know i have failed and my parents cannot afford it anyway. Haven't had friends since primary, prefer staying in my room. For some reason I have just been unable to study. I don't know why, I try but I cannot. Not to mention I keep having more and more issues that I have no control over. I'm basically waiting for this year, hoping I can do well because I know if I cannot move to another country I will finally have to consider whether I want to live anymore. It would be either that, or to try and repeat another year to fix my shit. Though even that is unlikely. There are still universities which will accept you despite mediocre or just plain shitty grades, try to see if you can find any. Then just try to study in uni, which is easy to say but I know it will be utterly miserable. But if you do that, then apply for a scholarship for Masters in another country. If you do not get a good enough scholarship, make sure to work part-time at least to make enough money to support yourself for the rest.
Though, my advice is not great. I am already too delusional about my future and I don't think I'll be able to move out anyway. But it's either that or to stop trying completely.


I suspect your lack of seizing initiative to study -much like my own case- is spearheaded by a lack of any communal push to incentivize you in doing so.
It is only natural, after all, that abstinence from something important [ in this case an intimate external element necessarily demanding some requirements of you for 'base' participation ] will ensue in the unwitting persistence of something insignificant [ anything that isn't *that* thing [ studying ] ]
I lost my ability to clearly speak physically after never having done so for only 8 months straight and to no surprise, with the added combination of neglecting social engagement on my part at all, I lost aspects of cognition like short term memory.
It's meaningless to me, now, anyway, and my efforts to exert some change, as I'm doing now, are probably pointless.
You get used to paradigms you create even if they're damning or maybe, despite them being damning, you still learn to thrive in them?
It's true that I can -and have- reaped motivation from toilets and seats in some of the most demanding of cases rather then colleagues and 'friends', sometimes still doing so today, so most significances warp to becoming insignificant in the progression to a new pattern.
OP if there's any silver lining to my above experience, it's that 'going outside' 'friends' 'similar people' 'depression' 'depersonalization' are eventually swept away by an ocean of numbness which will birth some degree of psychosis; definitely a failsafe triggered at the absence of all things needful.
Someone else or maybe yourself will lead you to a more appropriate path but if all things go wrong, know that it won't be too bad. You'll only be mentally decrypt in some ways and likely insane.


I think at this point no push could really help me. My only want in life so far has been to just leave it all behind to be alone, I would like to think that I could just commit suicide if I wanted to as a last resort but I don't think I'd ever be able to. I've already felt worse and worse for quite a while yet I still haven't. In the past couple years I especially started to go less and less outside, talked to less and less people and felt less and less comfort online and in real life. There wasn't anything for me to do in my day-to-day, there still isn't, so I just told myself that the reason other people could study while I couldn't was cause they had things in their life that gave them a reason to do so. Maybe things might go right, but I don't think they will. I like what you have written here, don't know what else to say.


Gosh man, I really sympathize with you, I'd say we're in similar boats, haha. I stopped going outside and even trying to socialize and interact with people and I get to feel uncomfortable being online and in real life. But I really believe in things will get better eventually, either that or I'm just lying to myself and I want to think that.

File: 1669453175706.png (1.06 MB, 602x838, ivy (small bg photo).png)


Real quick, I'm a schizophrenic NEET on disability but because Murica I do not make enough to live off of on my own. I've always had to take roommates to share the rent with, and because most people don't do that for free, it's usually a romantic partner I move in with. Because I'm vulnerable and stupid, I end up falling for a person who hurts me, or even starts beating me and insulting me just to put me down. So I run away. I call a friend somewhere else in the States who can move me somewhere else, and then it starts again. I meet a person, they hurt me, I leave.

You get the point, basically. Medicaid is state based, so when you move elsewhere, you need to reapply for that state's version of Medicaid. As I've already been to half the states in the country, and already moved twice this year, it's been very hard to keep my medical benefits steady (they can take up to 100 days to approve an applicant after the forms are filled out or, if you have SSI, respond to a change of address.)

I can't get my meds so it's harder and harder to go outside, I can barely get food, and might be moving again in another few months too.

My family says they're willing to house and feed me and take care of the cost of my medicine, but the only stipulation is that I cannot bring anyone home with me. THe problem with this is that I'm extremely codependent, too broken to live for my own sake, so I need someone to lean on and be my purpose. But after 6 or 7 consecutive relationships that turned abusive, I'm really just thinking there isn't much hope for me living comfortably, or doing anything other than struggling like an animal every day to survive.

Are there any other diagnosed schizophrenics here whose conditions are severely disabling? If so, I'd love to know how you're all getting by, because I'm having a really tough time out here. (pic unrelated, just a drawing I did when I moved here)
31 posts and 8 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.


cry about it


File: 1689564679147.png (19.79 MB, 3264x4324, the other side of reality ….png)

My brother in christ I'm not even a woman and I'm not even on estrogen, I couldn't afford that shit since losing my home… I'm male and was assigned male at birth. You clearly don't understand as much as you think you do about the way the world actually works if you of all people is so cocksure you can read people.


these long defensive paragraph posts are arguably more derailing than the hostile posters or at the very least furthering derailment.


File: 1689590054739.jpg (80.36 KB, 546x680, deathbrain23423.jpg)

This would be true if OP were able to actually ignore the hostile posters. But since they haven't be able to I want to give them at least a little bit of positive pushback against those types of posters. If no one responds at all it normalizes that our board is just okay with that kind of posting, it's the culture here, and we're okay with effortposters being pushed away. I will leave it here because I agree going back and forth is pointless and doesn't help anything, but one post isn't too much or derailing, the thread was already derailed.


i am also in the same boat disability wise, i personally get by just barely with a romantic partner and a landlord who doesnt mind helping with medical stuff sometimes, tho i def need to reapply (they took my medicaid away for not having enough paperwork) the most i can say is try to hang in there, i know the feeling of going through a hard time as well, cause im def in the same boat

File: 1686907251996.jpg (46.88 KB, 534x350, Am I autistic.jpg)


I'm not a hikki, but struggle with similar issues such as anxiety, isolation, alienation from others, loneliness etc… I can relate to a lot of people here. Because of some of my behaviour, I've started to wonder if I'm neurodivergent, possibly having autism or ADHD.

Some of these being:
- Hyperactive thoughts and restlesness due to it, and in this state going completely in an automatic mode
- Spacing out a lot, excessive daydreaming and maladaptive daydreaming
- Sensory sensitiveness, mostly to noise and I often experience a sensory overload and a shut down
- Very limited interests, if I don't have internal motivation to do something, I'm completely disinterested in it and have an extremely hard time completing it
- Liking sameness and getting distressed and annoyed when it's disturbed
- Difficulty recognizing what I'm exactly feeling, same with my desires and needs
- Clumsiness, often bumping to objects, poor motor skills.
- Liking and preferring being alone

There's a lot still to figure out but that's something… I'd say I'm quite emotionally intelligent, people often say that I'm good at conversing and they like talking to me because of that (in writing but still), so that makes me doubt it.. I also learnt to speak normally and to write at a quite young age too with ease. Sometimes I wonder if I'm just imagining it all, trying to make excuses for my inadequacy and laziness…

I've noticed that there are many neurodivergent people around, so that's why I'm posting this here… I'm planning to read more about it, but if anyone would like, I'm interested in hearing others' thoughts about this and experiences with such. Feel free to vent here too.


File: 1687098838100.jpg (62.4 KB, 474x354, mentally.jpg)

I always had the feeling that all those mental illnesses are just completly made-up bullshit to frame people who dont fit in with society.

>Hyperactive thoughts

I consume a lot of media, read alot of articles and drink a lot of caffeine so my mind is always running, but I never experienced a "automatic mode"
>spacing out
I only space out when I have nothing to do and have to wait for something to happen like in the waiting room for a doctor.
>sensory sensitiveness
I do hate loud crowds of people.
>limited interests
I like vidya, music, history and technology
>liking sameness
I actually really hate repetitive and redundant routines. I completly hate it sitting in the same room with the same retards and doing the same shit for years. If I would have to work I would become something like a trucker or pilot where I always visit new places and meet new people.
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

File: 1682404772180.png (1020.12 KB, 1200x630, font.png)


Is there an effective way to deal with harassment?

I got myself into a bad situation on social media, and it's making me want to isolate, or just fall back on old habits.
9 posts and 3 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.


that character is qt.
i should learn to draw tbh, i want to draw something like that.


File: 1683518017691.png (477.09 KB, 852x480, kkhta.png)

Touhou. The artist is Sentaku-sen on pixiv. He made a series called Koishi Komeiji's Heart Throbbing Adventure, which features Koishi as the main character and starts out with rough drawings. The art improves during later episodes:


Art takes a lot of practice, but it can be a fun hobby to get into.


File: 1683519698424.jpg (52.68 KB, 806x480, 20230425_032803.jpg)

I'll try to summarize this without getting into specifics.

There's a fandom I'm a part of which has users dictating content that gets made. Anti-types from places like tumblr. Back in March, a fan wrote an analysis of a character from games in the series, which garnered a negative reaction. It was well done- a thoroughly fascinating read, but people didn't see it that way. The anti crowd targeted this person, looking into their personal works for information to use against them and creating memes about it, jokes that were quickly run into the ground. Their response was to make a video essay further explaining their viewpoints/the drama without attacking anyone. It was an hour long, but didn't feel like it- the whole thing made me view the series in a way I had never considered before, and they included humor to keep things lighthearted. However, people didn't bother to watch, harassing them further.

I've been there before, with others looking down on me for creating something they dislike, so I made a post in support of the author. Detractors began attacking me next, and the user who was targeted didn't respond. This will sound like a foolish move, but I tried something else afterwards: creating a comic to sort of defuse everything, which seemed to work. People stopped after that. I didn't get as many responses, but because of what went down I'm considering leaving social media entirely, or just avoiding the fandom.

So that's what happened. I know it's stupid to care so much. The whole situation is pretty ridiculous. This happened just as I was dealing with personal issues in real life, and it feels like everything's getting worse.


I would not have cared, absolutely. Just kept on posting whatever i want, if you don't use your real identity then whats the harm? more fame for you.


Give them no attention, but never forget.

Delete Post [ ]
[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15] [16] [17] [18] [19] [20] [21] [22] [23] [24] [25]
| Catalog
[ yn / yndd / fg / yume ] [ o / lit / media / og / ig / 2 ] [ ot / cc / x / sugg ] [ hikki / rec ] [ news / rules / faq / recent / annex / manage ] [ discord / matrix / scans / mud / minecraft / usagi ] [ sushigirl / lewd ]