/hikki/ - NEET / Advice

i just found this site at random after delving through the /v/ archives for posts relating to seraphic blue instead of working because i'm tired.

never played yume nikki and i probably won't stay around long, but consider your thread noticed.

I'm playing Bomb Rush Cyberfunk. You should play Bomb Rush Cyberfunk.

Jet Set Radioooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=foiAkK8a0YE&ab_channel=LEGOVE

>>8230
Nah but seriously, I was feeling the same way as you OP. The ability to socialise or even talk to someone online feels empty, like everyone have a place they belong, but you.

>>8227

Thank you and I hope you enjoy reading about that game. I'm probably biased but you should try yume nikki if you think you might like it a little. Hope you can rest

>>8230
>>8231
What a fun song and fun looking game!! I'm glad someone understands, and thanks for stopping by. How do you cope with it, dear anon?

>>8233
I don't really know how to put it. As some anon in another thread said, keeping your head busy with some hobby or watching/reading new things actually helps (and even more so when the people around you don't have a similar taste or topic of conversation.)

I really think that quarantine horribly screwed up the few social skills that many of us had because now people feels more irritating sometimes.

For the time being I've substituted friendships with music, books and snippets of peoples' lives shared on imageboards. Keeping it to bare essentials, watching my life from the sidelines. I like to think of it as a temporary measure. Something doesn't feel right with the world and I'd rather wait it out. Whenever pangs of loneliness well up, I just put on some songs and these feelings perish for a while. Looking at the past years of my life, I wonder if socializing was a losing game for the kind of person I am.

hi

>>8235

>Something doesn't feel right with the world and I'd rather wait it out.
>Looking at the past years of my life, I wonder if socializing was a losing game for the kind of person I am.

I even search and look some of my old post from places like old social media accounts or comments on websites and I feel like those are written by a totally different person, rather than me. Obviously your way of thinking changes by the time and you growing up as a person, but now socializing is like talking to a wall. I'm genuinely surprised how I managed to make friends years ago or just talk like a normal person without overthinking fucking everything

I know this sounds like it was written by some schizoid tin hat, but I really think something is not right out there too.

>>8239
I strongly try to follow my conviction that living in the past brings unhappiness, so I never seek out my old messages on purpose unless I need to find something – but at times words peek through by accident. And it's just like you said, different person. One that I still see myself in, but also there's no live connection with them to speak of, like a twin separated at birth or something. Like shed skin that refuses to point in any direction and lost its meaning.

>overthinking fucking everything
Ah, I know this mindstate intimately. Even now it took me some extra time to produce a response because of that overthinking, as embarassing as that is. (And so I scaled down a little.)

It's a tricky situation, where overthinking causes distress but under-thinking causes its own kind of frustration too. Most of my irl conversations, as well as they flowed in the moment, felt empty afterwards. The most important things are the most difficult to talk about after all, like there's a barrier.

>this sounds like it was written by some schizoid tin hat
I didn't mean for that bit to sound so scary, and I'm glad it resonated with you. (And the other things…) Society too has its ebbs and flows.

>your way of thinking changes by the time and you growing up as a person
What stage of life are you at anon? If I may ask

>gif related
Apt choice! I was really into that game, as short as it was. Thanks for reminding of it, haven't thought about it in a while. Great soundtrack and the writing showed a huge improvement over the first one. I don't think I've completed all the endings…

>>8239
>>8234
I don't think it has anything to do with our ability to socialize. I think social norms itself are moving towards heightened exclusivity (the reason - because they can; or else a profit scheme), and those who fail to adapt quickly enough are left behind, dazed and confused.

Chatting up people who are out and about used to be normal, you can see it with the older generation, with how ready they are to strike up a conversation with strangers. But for us, it feels like a social faux pas, like we're breaching into someone's personal space. Or I don't know, maybe that's just how it is for me. But you'll find so many forms of moralization online discouraging people from approaching strangers, from relying too much on those close to them, and to top it off, cringe/shame culture and the ability to publically humiliate and ostracize anyone and everyone, keeping any oscilations from the norm in constant check. Mass proliferation of anxiety over being a nuisance to those around us. But I'm probably just projecting. And derailing.

But OP, I think it's a good and reassuring thing that you're trying to reach out. Even bringing a couple of strangers together for a bit like this is a meaningful contribution that you've made in the world, imo. It's the kind of warmth that deserves to be appreciated.

>>8257
>Most of my irl conversations, as well as they flowed in the moment, felt empty afterwards.

Same issue that I feel, I think may be some kind of burnout. I tend to talk alone a lot, both mentally and verbally. With someone else, I suffer a biblical mental bluescreen.

>What stage of life are you at anon? If I may ask

A 21 old anon Asperger, thinking about things. At least I (or we) have enough time to think about life things and do something

Also nice that you enjoy the mikl gaem!

what video games do you play?
what movies do you like?
you and i can watch movies and play games together.

>>8260
>At least I (or we) have enough time to think about life things and do something
It just so happens that we're the same age! So yes. Never give up on thinking… no matter how incomprehensible it all seems. This kind of goes against a lot of common advice that I see but I believe that focused thinking, and only that, can truly attempt to solve one's own problems, rather than immersing oneself in groupthink
>>8261
Ditto for me, if you'd be interested in something like that OP (or some other form of hanging-out that suits you)

>>8259
I can say I share that feeling of "Mass proliferation of anxiety over being a nuisance to those around us." Not sure if is some mental illness or just times and way of interacting with others are changing.. too fast

I also would like to make friends, since everyone here is a yume nikki fan I think we would all get along since it's one of our connected things in common. The discord invite does not work anymore, did it got deleted? maybe everyone could be friends in another platform no idea what you guys use.

>>8227
I feel the same way. Probably just old but I haven't made a friend online in ages.

>>8285
The more you growing up, the more harder is to make friends. Even trying to meet people in online like in some games is difficult

>>8286
well most games these days don't even have a decent chat feature.

Big Discord servers with hundreds of eyes looking at you are intimidating imo. I wish we could start a smaller, more tight-knit community of sorts

>>8234
I've been trying my best and it feels like it helped somewhat. Yeah.. I wonder if it was always that way a lot

>>8235
I do enjoy the snippets.. it's good you've identified the issue for you anon. The kind of person you are? I guess there's a reason we all end up here

>>8236
Hello

>>8239
I've felt that way too.. I suppose looking at it from a very outside perspective, there could be a variety of things making us feel that way. Even with that in mind I can't shake it. I'm in no place to give advice sadly but I understand the past socialising. I wish there was unironically something put in place to help hikkis.
I tried to send this earlier but it didn't work so I haven't had time to process new replies.. a discord server might be an ok starting point ,even thought they turn fast

Oh I forgot to say this again last post, carelessly took too many tablets sorry for strange posting habits . Op here, I honestly just play visual novels, but I have a newfound interest in old anime movies and a medium sized watchlist, so if anyone would be up for anything I'd try to see how to set things up

>>8288
I feel that.

>>8291
You can find some full old animes on yt and other gems too

>>8291
What sorts of visual novels, anon? Would you consider reading along together to be an option?

also wanna know any vn recs op. I've mainly played otomes and some indie english vns, but some of the dialogue in the latter has kinda… not appealed to me these days lmao. i wanna branch out!!

>>8280
I mostly hang out on Discord and rarely IRC (not sure about what other anons use), I wouldn't mind friending you and talking sometime, and I left my Email in case you want to talk.

>>8235
>>8239
If it's any condolence, I feel you both very deeply on those points. I feel like I don't socialize the best, and when I do actually have good conversations I think people only talk to me out of pity. Online friendships can seem sorta shallow or stilted for me, so to a certain extent they end up burning out slowly, and I end up feeling like I wonder what I did wrong. Thoughts like was I too boring I even try hitting people up occasionally just to try and see if we can catch up and it all falls on deaf ears; making me feel like a nuisance. It especially sucks because it leaves me feeling isolated even when my friends list is about 20-25 people. At this point I can only be constructive i.e use this feeling to better myself or destructively i.e blame everyone else and close myself off.

I feel the opposite. Maybe it's just the people I talk to, but everyone seems lost, confused, sad, going through a mental meatgrinder. Myself included. It's all very tiring. I love all of you though and wish the best for you

>>8295
>>8294
I like shingakkou and fatamoru.. I know they're normie recs but I'm not deep enough yet

>>8298
>everyone seems lost, confused, sad, going through a mental meatgrinder.

Thinking about how this is gonna evolve in at least 5 or 6 years frighten me.

>>8309
Hmm I don't think Shingakkou is that normie at all, I've just heard of it for the first time now. Seeing the full title reminded me of a brilliant french film from 1971, also subtitled "noli me tangere", I wanna check it out now
>>8310
How do you think it could evolve? I worry it's just going to quiet down and fade out, with no answers and everyone none the wiser

>>8310
If the pharmaceutical supply line ever shut down there would be pandemonium from all the potentially completely unhinged people repressed by medication suddenly turned loose

I was feeling lonely. But then I find my love for games that I buy months ago and never touched (Steam syndrome) until now that I finally playing them. Balatro is my doom.

lately i've been feeling everything and nothing. i found energy but do some things, but i know very well i cannot keep this up and i don't know what to do about it.

>>8311
Wow, looks like I'll have to check out the film!
>>8312
I feel like that too but oh well
>>8314
Is it depression?
Oh I forgot to reply to the reading along together thing.. that'd be fun if my interests weren't so restricted. Maybe any vn anons here could do it together?
I've had a lot of brain fog lately, so I haven't been able to reply meaningfully, but I wanted to put it out there online that lately I've been really feeling like the last person on this planet.

>>8314
Not saying it is but that sounds like anhedonia. I feel this from time to time, not just with boring activities but with stuff I enjoy too like videogames. Everything feels like a chore.

>>8561
Together with you or together with each other?

>>8313
What’s the image in your post from uboanon?

I used to think that I was unwell for being a loner that did not want to integrate into a larger society. Everyone else is thinking about capital, marriage and retirement, don't they? What kind of man does not strive for wealth and children? I will tell you what kind of man: the same kind that can see the illusions of this world for what they are.

Why do you people live for? Do you live for the sake of living, or do you seek something beyond our rotten world? Because those who live in order to live will perish, while those who want to reach for the stars will reach them! Everyone will see the suffering of the Earth at some point in their journey, and when they do they will either accept the world and seek its comfort or rebel against the world because it is wicked. You can see how all wars are unjust, all states are illegitimate and all rulers are robbers. Then why do you wish to live for the king and his kingdom when you can live for your own salvation? Leave the master alone to rule over his slaves, and seek comfort elsewhere.

They will call me mad for rejecting the world, but they cannot see that they are mad themselves. We are all broken by the world around us, nobody is left unscarred. Some will realize this, others will not. We live to be understood by our peers, but they can never understand us. There are no words that can fully convey what bothers the soul, and no one can peer into our minds to see our thoughts naked. That is why you are condemned to live and die on this Earth alone.

What am I going to do now? What are you going to do? I don't know, but we must seek our salvation independently. No two lives can be the same, as such no solutions can be either.

(also sorry for the schizopost lolo)

>>8591
Looks like that Sims game made for a younger audience, MySims I think it was called. Played the shit out of it back in the day