my mother has come to realize that i havent been leaving my bed let alone my room and she's starting to try to pull me out of the room to spend time with her (e.g. cooking, helping her out with stuff). however, there's some subconscious side of me that

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she's trying, it isn't working - why won't i let her help? Anonymous 06/25/25 (Wed) 00:13:06 No.9531

my mother has come to realize that i havent been leaving my bed let alone my room and she's starting to try to pull me out of the room to spend time with her (e.g. cooking, helping her out with stuff).

however, there's some subconscious side of me that, against my will, fights her at every step and the moment i'm free from her plunges me back deeper into isolation. i don't know what to do. i dont want to be this way anymore. i don't want to be alone but for some reason part of me does want to.

i wanted to live a normal life. i wanted to go to community college. i wanted to have a career. i wanted to have a loving husband. instead i can't remember the last time i left my house.

please for the love of god help me. i cant keep living like this. i genuinely don't know what to do anymore. i don't want to die a miserable shell of who i used to be.

Anonymous 06/25/25 (Wed) 21:41:30 No.9534

sounds like depression

Anonymous 06/25/25 (Wed) 21:46:55 No.9535

>>9534
oh yeah about that to clarify for further discussion i am diagnosed with major depressive disorder and nearly dropped out of high school because of it

Anonymous 06/26/25 (Thu) 09:35:59 No.9536

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I think what it comes down to, and this might not sound helpful/easier said than done, is just resisting the urge. i guess "resisting the other side of you" in this instance. it'll be extremely uncomfortable but you can't have anything if you don't try for it. little by little of course, don't force yourself too hard in the beginning or you will fall back. it sounds like your mother is pretty much giving you baby steps so try your hardest to go along with her for now and then work your way up. maybe to not immediately go NEET mode again, you could hang out with her a little longer each time you do something together, like a chat after putting away the groceries or what have you or talking about the food you guys made and considering other recipes. hope this doesn't sound too reddit, i believe in you anon-chan

Anonymous 06/28/25 (Sat) 11:26:05 No.9538

the reason why you kinda dont want to get out of this subconsciously is most likely because that is simply what you have become used to. isolation is your everyday life since probably quite a long time and getting out of your comfort zone is extremely hard but definitely possible. so yeah do what anon said, push yourself through with it, the fact that your mother acknowledges your problem and offers you subtle help is giving you a big advantage in terms of healing. accept her help, do not dump it in the trash just cause youre afraid or because it seems difficult. thats one of the reasons why many people (including me) stay stuck forever.