I heard this one at a Renascence fair, pic unrelated.2 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.
So a duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender: "My good sir, do you have any grapes?". To this the bartender says no, so the duck goes home.
The next day, the duck comes back and asks the same question: "Do you have any grapes?", he gets the same answer, so he goes back home.
This carries on for about two weeks, then the bartender says "THAT'S IT, IF YOU ASK IF I HAVE GRAPES AGAIN, I'M GOING TO NAIL YOUR FEET TO THE FLOOR!" to the duck and then shows him out.
So the next day the duck comes back and asks "My good sir, do you have any NAILS?". The bartender raises an eyebrow and says "No, I don't".
The duck then grins and asks "Do you have any grapes?"
/bricked for bad jokes
This is the only time I've ever liked you