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/rec/ - Ex-NEET / Recovery

Board for recovering NEETs and Ex-NEETs who are trying to reintegrate.
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File: 1586790580511.gif (2.26 MB, 288x540, 1465848663288.gif)

 No.59[Reply]

there's this girl I'm seeing that's 10 years older than me. she's the first girl I've made out and fondled with. she's alright, and I like her, but (I suppose this comes with our rather significant age difference) she's too forward and horny all the time and it makes me feel uncomfortable. I ain't even ready to have sex yet

where and how can I meet girls *my* age (this is what I'd wager marked our differences) that are reserved, quiet and introverted like me? I'm into manga, videogames and writing, not sure if it matters

I don't even know how to deal with women. getting a chance with this girl was mostly pure luck. we hardly knew each other, flirted a little bit on social media and then we met up and stuff. since it's not going as smoothly as I expect, I think trying other methods would be a good idea
some friends suggested clubbing after this whole pandemic crap ends, but it's not really my scene
22 posts and 4 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.285

>>274
maybe it's one of those success stories everyone talks about

 No.289

>>283
who are you quoting mister redditor sir?

 No.290

File: 1631043525263.jpg (44.83 KB, 630x630, 15206646_0.jpg)

>>282
>How dare you go to a shitty dance shithole for normies
>Goes to shitty dance shithole for normies with a cool name

 No.291

>>59
nigga you got groomed

 No.337

>>290
to be fair, the chances of meeting someone who knows what Yume Nikki is at a rave are like 0.5%, whereas at a "club" I'd confidently say 0%

also club music is utterly unlistenable pop hip hop horseshit but EDM is at least kind of tolerable if you're on molly



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 No.192[Reply]

technically not a NEET now, but has been one on/off ever since i was 18. I have many things to say, ill just condense everything here.
so, it feels like i have accomplished nothing, other then start my GED, no job yet, no funds saved and getting one would be very overwhelming and the previous job i had at a store was horrible.

do you know any good jobs for a sperg recluse? I was thinking videogame QA, agoraphobia limits my choice in employment aswell.

also, i feel like i wasted all my free time doing nothing, and not even having much fun, just on youtube, discord and videogames mindlessly watching, playing and talking to people on discord but that ends up making me feel alienated since i dont feel i can be genuine, theres no place where i can say whats on my mind and just have an honest conversation, im re-discovering image boards again, this place seems like gold, sad that im only discovering good things such as yume nikki and uboachan when i was post NEET. As another anon posted, im thinking of looking into IRC/fediverse aswell to discover small comfy internet bunkers.

i wish i would have done things differently and discovered things earlier, too bad i cant get nostalgic about these things now, oh well.

unrelated but, im thinking of making a yume nikki inspired game, i dont want to be the "ideas guy" anymore, and i want to finally create SOMETHING in my life, i dont want to be lazy and passive no longer, im not motivated by fame, or money, just a drive to create and my imagination. Im not going to quit when i come across a obstacle. I have no skills, but i will MAKE skills if i have to!

this probably sounds like a autistic ramble, it probably is.
2 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.232

>>198
Not op here, but ive considered doing security but im not big.
>I don't want to be an idea guy
Can I be?

 No.233

>>232
I've definitely seen smaller guys doing security at places. It's less common but it happens. Just get your guard card and certifications, and then join a security company and they will assign you somewhere.

 No.236

>>192
on the genuine part, there are some 4chan threads on some boards that are very comfy, even some REALLY shitty boards like /biz/, we sometimes have like 15-20 IPs per thread

 No.237

>>233
>>232
>>198
I'm weak, I have never held a job before this, and I have no skills to speak of. Was a neet for 10 years after I graduated high school.

Applying for a job with G4S for a security position was the best choice in my life. $15 an hour to do essentially nothing but scan points every two hours. Absolutely cake. I feel like unless it's for a store or a public place you aren't going to really need to be that big, intimidating guy most people imagine.

 No.287

about the game, have you done anything? lol



File: 1618814624730.jpeg (74.82 KB, 620x620, despair.jpeg)

 No.222[Reply]

I just had a panic attack while attending an employment training course. I've had them before but this was the worst one yet, I feel like such a failure when everyone else there is perfectly fine with the tasks, and I'm not. Anyone else have experience with them? Have you been able to overcome them?

 No.223

File: 1618842468239.png (356.11 KB, 497x544, 9234623874.png)

I remember having panic attacks when I was in school during those on the job training periods. I ran to hide in the toilets for hours. To combat this I wore earmuffs and closed myself in my thoughts. If you don't want to look like a retard like me you could instead just wear headphones and listen to some music to drive the same purpose. Though these measures didn't really help me that much so what do I know I'm unfit for work anyway. Sorry for retard text. Hopefully you can understand ._.

 No.224

>>223
Panic attacks sucks but a good way to calm down yourself is drinking water and breathe correctly, also the lack of sleep can makes you feel like shit, everything is mental so care about your mind :)

 No.226

>>223
first things you should remember. breathing, steady it, focus on a rhythm. remember what time it is, look at your surroundings how to figure that out. feel the surfaces around you. focus on the present state, and try and bring yourself down to earth. remember a phrase that becomes a mindset. "this too will pass"

i have panic attacks all the time, i just became more aware i've been having them. if you often have anxiety attacks on a very reoccuring basis you may need a synapic damper to help. it doesnt make you feel much better, just can lessen the onset.

 No.239

File: 1626977520081.png (901.38 KB, 1080x598, 1621610807915.png)

>>222
You are not a failure.
I have had panic attacks before which have steered my life in a different direction that I initially would have imagined it going in, but I'm still here.

I had a panic attack in a plane before it had taken off during a school trip. It was so bad I had to go out of the plane before taking off. It was horrid having to get up and move through the plane and have everyone watch me like that.
A low point that made me incredibly dejected for weeks.
Later, I tried going to a folk high school (Americans don't have it I think, I don't want to explain the concept, but it's kinda like a boarding school for all ages mostly 18+ and up)
I had to quit just a week in due to being completely wrecked. It was as if I had been in a constant state of anxiety the entire time. It was terrible.
I was incredibly dejected for months.
It's been a couple years now since my troubles with anxiety truly turned for the worse, but it's starting to look up now and I've learned some things.

Other anons have already given good advice. It's important to try and tie yourself to reality and not get lost in it when it happens. Acknowledge your panic attack and accept it. Do what you can to get through it and continue moving forward. I think it will get better, slowly. It will get better.

You Are not a failure just because you are not like everyone else. You have your own troubles that you have to deal with, and that doesn't make you a failure. Grow from your experiences and learn about yourself. I think you will come to better handle your panic attacks if you take anons tips to mind and remember them. Sometimes it's not all going to work, it will surely be lots of ups and downs, but don't give up. I got lucky and got a really good psychiatrist a bit later. It's possible that seeking professional help will be beneficial to you, but the opposite is also true.
I was also deeply, deeply struck by the theme of struggling through great adversity in Berserk when Miura died. Deeply struck. It is a very strong message and it has impacted me greatly in the last few months
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

 No.260

>>239
Hey, not OP but I want you to know that you motivated me to go through with getting to this school I somehow managed to get into. I dropped out of highschool and have been a neet for 7 years. I’ve had 2-3 panic attacks the last 5 days trying to drive across country to get here abd turned around twice but I’m here now. I still may go home in a week but thankyou for helping me fund the motivation to try.



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 No.225[Reply]

Hello

I am looking for my Canadian friend. He went offline almost exactly this time 3 years ago.

His name is 0x39. Other names he went by were Nick and turbotard and 疑惑 and lots of other kanji names that I can't remember.
He was very nice to me and was aspiring to be tea otaku. He sometimes posted on Lainchan a long time ago (maybe 5+ years ago?). He was studying computer science back in 2018. One time he went to a maid cafe in Japan.

Do you know my friend? How can I reach him?
I just want to find my friend again. I miss him very much. Please let me know if you know him, my email is in the email field!

The next bit is for 0x39 if he's reading this. It's top sekrit private!! So please don't open spoiler unless you're the real 0x39!!!!
Hi, I know I'm doxing you a bit, I'm really sorry. I'm just trying to find you, but I know maybe you don't want to be found. I'm so sorry for intruding. You disappeared at the end of April 2018, I never got to be a better friend to you. We only talked for a little bit. I knew you were going soon, you said you were troubled by things. I wanted so much to hold onto you tighter, but I didn't want to smother you. You slipped away. You said you might make a new steam profile one day, but I don't think that day has come yet. You were a nice person and I wished I could've helped you more when you needed a friend the most. But I got there too late. It was already time for you to go. It's always like that for me: late to every party. I remember, I told you that you should always try to say a proper goodbye to your friends, just so they know for sure. And the last thing you gave to me was just a little "so…bye I guess". I always felt that it didn't count, not when you'd left so much unfinished, friend.

 No.240

I hope you found your friend, op.

 No.244

This is pretty creepy, man.

 No.245

:(

I hope you find your friend soon op…

 No.246

I hope you find your friend soon, good luck.

 No.257

time to move on dude



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 No.34[Reply]

just when I was turning my life around a global pandemic hits
how are you living through the covid madness, bros? I still gotta commute to work lmao
37 posts and 9 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.227

>>34
If you live in the United Kingdom and you're unemployed, you can have the government pay your rent and be left with £400 a month in unemployment benefits to live on afterwards. That's $588 a month in american money.

It's not a lot of money, the money sucks, but there's over 200 countries in the world and in most of them you'd starve to death.

Over here the government forced businesses to close, so with landlords still demanding rent from those businesses, lots of companies are struggling to survive. I like to call it the Job Destruction Scheme.

 No.228

>>227
i did not know that, it sounds too good to be true. even if i needed it, and i probably will some day, i'd feel guilty or ashamed asking for free money for no outwardly obvious reason other than being a softheaded hikkineet

 No.229

>>227
Is this only true during covid or has it always been like that? Are there conditions like "you have to prove you're trying to get a job"?

 No.230

>>229
I'm assuming they're talking about the typical benefit most countries have where yes "you have to prove you're trying to get a job". However, many countries have made the application process much easier and they're a bit slacker/more lenient now. For example here around Oceania, they made it much easier to apply, now you can do it all online and simply submit screenshots of your required documents and never have to go into their offices. Before covid you had to go in and attend a seminar and give them all this paperwork, talk to people yadda yadda, you have to keep going back for workshops to make yourself more employable etc none of that shit now lol. I've been collecting for a couple months now (and I just reached the age threshold where I get paid out a bit more, yay) and I've not had contact from anyone haha, tho I'm not sure what I'll do when they finally ask me how my applications have been going… ideally you should just be putting in the odd token application while being sure to come across as a terrible employee. It's hard enough to get a job when you really try so you don't have to do too much, some spelling mistakes, poor formatting etc. worst case they'll just warn you you aren't applying for enough.

 No.255

I'm doing training online with a remote training company so I get to work from home for a few days. Before the pandemic there would have been no question about going in to the office but now we get these moments



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 No.234[Reply]

Its a cloudy, dark gloomy day outside and if the lockdown had never happenned, if I had made another choice a year ago, I would be outside enjoying the sights and coming home from a boring day at work.

Instead I choose to earn a living by staring at a screen all day and typing non-sense only autists and computers can understand. I'm not even that good at it.

There is nothing stopping me from going out but I'm so unsightly, I'm not the person I was a year ago and I don't have anywhere to go anymore either.

I feel dread every time I hear the microsoft teams notification sound.

I'm becoming agoraphobic again, how is this any different from being a NEET?


File: 1594319192576.jpg (246.21 KB, 2048x1152, 523807a524b2e4dd9b9ad51c00….jpg)

 No.110[Reply]

Post here whenever you make a good step. Today I talked to some old friends from school, one hour either side of pressing send was absolute hell but everything after that was almost hilariously easy and I had a good time.
3 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.194

>>111
I'm still (nominally) trying to get my license and I'm 28! I got a permit to learn, but I can only learn with someone else in the car and it's too scary and my mum's car is too big and scary for me to learn/drive in.
I hope you did your best anyway!

 No.218

>>194
Well, turns out the whole thing is a bit rigged in my country. Basically, you have to pass a test about driving theory and one about driving practice. To prepare for the test you must purchase classes, each class allows you to drive with a teacher for 45 minutes. Turns out the driving school has to milk a certain amount of money out of you or you won't pass the test. And at almost 1000€ spent (ran out of money) it wasn't enough for them so I tried two times to pass the actual test and no dice, the teachers are buddies with the people who test you (won't even try to hide it, the last time I overheard them talking about going to drink a few beers after they were done with me) and if you haven't paid enough you fail the exam because they already know how to "make you" fail. Amazing that this thing happens in an actual European country in 2021. So I still can't drive because I don't have money to pay the corruption tax…

On the bright side, I did complete my security guard training and I could potentially get a job soon. I don't think much will change, I'm already 27 and have lived like this my whole life, I don't even want to put effort to make friends or things like that. I've gotten to a point where I actively avoid it, it's like interacting with people more than necessary is a hassle for me. I just talk with some close friends and that's it. I have nothing in common with normies, what would be the point of becoming anything else than circumstantial acquaintances with them? I don't even know how people have the energy to make a worthwhile friendship with more than 1 or 2 friends. This is like that thing that happens to people who've been in jail for too long, they just stop considering any other lifestyle and go back to jail on purpose.

 No.219

>>218
What do you feel that you could teach a normie, if anything?

 No.220

I've successfully completed four weeks of uni. My other attempts over the past few years have barely lasted a week. A couple of people have spoken to me and I've tried talking to them but I feel like they'll eventually work out how defective I am and stop trying soon enough. One already has but the other one still says hi to me when we walk past each other.
>>111
Good work mate. I'm 27 and only have my learner's licence. We're also the personality type.
>>172
Good work on getting the debit card and also doing it on your own. I understand how doing that sort of stuff by yourself can be difficult.

 No.221

>>219
What do you mean?



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 No.148[Reply]

I was meditating upon the subject for a while and this is the conclusion I have to come to "to wish to live you must wish to die" wishing to live in the sense of "really living" you can't keep running and be safe in your castle, it's a rather colourless way to live one with no variations, very grey.

I mean 2 different things when I say "live and alive, "to "wish to live" you must "wish to die" that is to say wish to encounter your worst fear or whatever you have ran away from to hide in your castle, it's the only way to get colour, to embrace life you must embrace death, I do not mean this in a literal sense I mean life as in the positive aspects and death as in the hurdles and fears, one cannot exist without the other, you guys probably know all this stuff already though being able to identify if something is optimal doesn't mean you are incentivised or willing to enact it.

it seems there are 2 choices to continue this grey lifestyle or to try and do something.

this post probably sounds severely schizophrenic and I doubt I was able to get my point across, all of this was inspired by a chat with a former hikkineet I had, I will keep you lads in my prayers.

 No.149

>>148
I understand what you mean OP and would like to point out that you can paint this grey to whatever you want and however you want.
You can even do it from home, while still being a hikki neet. It only depends on what you do, how often you do it and how much you invest into it. You could even work from home. Well I hope to read future updates on your doing and thank you for your prayers, I have some use for them currently.

 No.213

Nothing wrong with schizophrenia tbh.

 No.215

i agree to an extent but the good has to outweigh the bad to be worth it, some of us are hikkis because before the hikki life there was too much bad and absolutely nothing good

 No.216

>>215
>the good has to outweigh the bad to be worth it
Not op but I don't agree. If I were given the choice between a life of 3/4 bad + 1/4 good and a life completely neutral I would take the first easily.

 No.217

>>216
lmao



File: 1610067178040.png (574.82 KB, 477x1051, 20201106_231917.png)

 No.182[Reply]

Sorry if there's already a thread for this, but do any anons have special living arrangements?
Group homes, supported housing, assisted living, etc.
I'm looking into them trying to slowly transition from crippiling poor tard into a semi-functional-on-the-surface member of society, so if any anons have or had lived in one of these it would be nice to read.

 No.187

Contact the governemnt and talk to a social worker they may help you it depends why you want/need to stay in one.



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 No.124[Reply]

everythings fine. great, even. it appears i do have some social skills and put them to work just fine

then why do i feel so doubtful and despairing all the time? why do i feel sluggish and backwards when i compare myself to others? why do i feel like ive been left aside from important or enjoyable moments because of just being me? why do i feel encased in ice, trapped in time and unable to catch up with everyones rythm?

every been to a party? for those who have, id probably know how we would spend time at it: awkwardly holding a glass of soda in a corner while looking at our feet. thats what id do anyways. thats how id feel anyways. thats the feeling that chases me to this very day, at any moment. at home. outside. alone. with other people
me; stunted by rave lights and ear-shattering music like a deer surprised by a car's headlights watching everyone have fun and be better

 No.125

>>124
I know that feel. For me it's part anxiety and part trauma. You can try drinking some alcohol to dis-inhibit, and it's also helpful if you go with a friend who will be a social wingman for you, like introduce you to people and help drive the conversation towards things you have an easier time talking about, like your interests. If you don't have such a person you will just have to walk up to someone and be awkward. This is more difficult than it sounds, but you will feel great when it actually works, even if it's just a few minutes of conversation before you exhaust yourself. The social muscle needs to be exercised or it will atrophy, and exercise strengthens it. Like any exercise, it is painful when you start up doing it.

I got my start with out-of-highschool socializing by doing offline meets with people who shared my interests. It's easier to talk to someone offline if you have spent some time feeling them out online.

That said, I still do a lot of sitting around when I go to parties, but otherwise I stick around people I know and try to get in a few words with their friends who come talk to them. Networking is one of the easiest ways to increase your number of friends, because you can assume the new person is comfortable with your friend, so there will be some measure of compatibility.



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