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/rec/ - Ex-NEET / Recovery

Board for recovering NEETs and Ex-NEETs who are trying to reintegrate.
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 No.1[Reply]

Since it's sometimes difficult to have a conversation about trying to exit the NEET lifestyle in /hikki/ without it getting derailed, I have created this new board for such conversations.

If you are trying to go back to school or get a job, or if you've exited NEETdom a while ago but are still having problems, this is now the place to talk about it.


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 No.6[Reply]

Ex-NEET/Hiki general thread, how long has it been since you got out of it? What are you working on right now? Do you feel like going back to that life sometimes?

I got a job and started going outside 6 years ago, after 2 years of being isolated completely, sometimes I feel tempted of just staying at home playing videogames all day, or to stay in bed doing absolutely nothing, I am still depressed, recently something bad happened, and I felt the need of going back to those habits, close my social media and be a full time anon again.

An important part of my recovery was the people around me, and volunteering at hospitals and hostels for the bed, working still feels kind of weird though.

Now I work as a programmer and web designer, not the best job for someone like me, but it's what I learned to do.

It's hard, but like an anon told me here, if I got out of that mentality once, I can do it again, and so can you.
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 No.566

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>>565
Was Jesus a NEET?

 No.567

>>565
Thanks man, I have taken refuge in Vajrayana Buddhism and it really changed my life. I didn't recommend it because I asume most people here have already made up their minds regarding religion.
Once my health and vitality improved the reality of the spiritual world started becoming intuitively obvious and eventually I decided to follow a living tradition. Christianity appeals more to me culturally, but I can't accept eternalism and monotheism; in any case I think any religion is superior to atheism.

 No.568

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>>567
Friend, this is not (organized) religion, as in do this and do that. This is a personal relationship with the Creator God of Heaven and Earth. Look around you for example, doesn't it look like it was created by the same Designer? If in the Bible, the most popular, the most unique, historically accurate and united COLLECTION of SEVENTY books (look at the picture I posted, there is no other book like it), written by over FOURTY different authors, over A THOUSAND AND SIX HUNDRED years or possibly over TWO THOUSAND years, it is written over and over that there is one God, and in there it is prophecied and revealed the just and merciful truth that our debts were paid by God Himself in the flesh, Jesus Christ of Nazareth. If a thief for example steals, is it just for him to go unpunished because he kept all of the other laws? Of course not. Do not be deceived by the false justice of these false religions, that your good is weighed against your evil. Who can satisfy God's will when we are born with a sinful nature as is clearly seen even when you look at little children that don't need to be taught to steal and lie and be selfish? Only God Himself that came in the flesh, Jesus Christ, and lived a perfect life to take upon himself our debts by dying on the cross, being buried, and raised again on the third day, is our hope! It is a gift so simple that can be grasped by a child, just believe. If you have any more questions or would like some resources, feel free to ask.

 No.570

>>565
>>568
And IT IS NOT WHAT YOU DO (of course action follows faith) BUT WHAT HE DID, DOES, AND WILL DO.

 No.585

Im trying to do new things instead of just rotting at the PC the whole day. Its being difficult, but i'm improving dayt by day



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 No.117[Reply]

Did anyone else escape NEET life and now just finds it even more lonely and isolating? I honestly haven't posted here or on any other chans in years. After nearly decade of being a NEET from 16 to 24, I did manage to get my life together. I have a job and am in a good university working towards my PHD, I'm what people would consider a "success" in that regards but its just lonely.

I can't relate to normal people, they don't have the same shared experience of growing up a NEET and being fucked in the head for so long. I can't make any connection with these people that has any meaning beyond the superficial. Meanwhile internet culture has completely left me behind and is weird and foreign to me, and honestly not interested in getting involved in most of whatever people are angry about.

I miss those days of feeling connected to others through the screen. At least I had others who understood back then.
9 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.188

>>186
I have been seeking for years and found nothing, but thank you.

 No.211

>I can't make any connection with these people that has any meaning beyond the superficial.
Do you try to fit in with society or are you actually trying to bond with people? If the former, then it's no wonder lol. Unironically be yourself and keep an open mind, but have a resolve of steel and be prepared to be treated like a weirdo by oversocialized people. You'll eventually find at least someone similar to yourself.

>>120
I dunno man, I'd love to not *have* to work, but wage society demands so. Being a NEET doesn't necessarily imply being a hikki, you know?

 No.370

>>117
Yes and no. Sound like we walked fairly similar paths (also working towards my PhD and people have completely 180'd their opinions on me as a result). I don't think I'll ever be able to relate to normies but I think that works to your advantage.

What kind of PhD you working on? Something you find yourself quiet passionate about? I'm doing spider ecology with a blend of taxonomy (it's been my passion since childhood) and being super passionate about something normies don't get or understand is like crack for normies. They keep inviting me to do educational and social things (on bad days I feel like they want me to dance for them like some kind of clown, but the more and more I do it, the more and more fun I'm having) and it's building my confidence up nicely. If you feel like you have the spare energy, talk to some local volunteer groups related (even loosely) to your PhD topic and throw some educational volunteer work under your belt. It's true that we may never be able to relate to normies, but when you swim in the same waters as them enough, you'll notice that relating to them isn't the only way to interface with them. Some of them truly appreciate us oddities for what we are and want to hear what we have to say.

Don't sell yourself short eh? You made it to the PhD phase, normie or not, you've got the skills, now you just have to show them off a little!

 No.380

>>186
this post inspired me to apply for a job at the NSA and join the fedverse

 No.584

I cant stand being around people and I loathe my job every time i am alone and doing what i want to I am happy but between those moments I'm miserable real people irritate me i have very few friends and even some of them bother meI hate the world i hate society i am disgusted by so many things AND I HARDLY EVER HAVE THE TIME TO RELAX I HATE how difficult it is to just have some fucking paece of mind in my life I hate havng people know i exist or think about me I wish I could detach from all my conenctions relationships seclude myself far away and be alone forever even behind my back ive seen my friends laugh at me my only friends laughing at me even in front of me to my face theydisrespect my wishes No one leaves me alone and leaves me to my own devices which is ALL i want from people now but apparently that is too much to ask and i find it increasinly hard to stay calm around certain peopleI HAVE NEVER FELT SO UNHAPPYIN MY ENTIRE LIFE AS I DO NOW AROUND EVERYBODY ALL THE TIME AND I RARELY EVER FEEL GOOD ANYMORE EVeryday feels like a pointless slog and attrition warfare



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 No.554[Reply]

Hello lovely people, I just wanted to make this thread to remind you that it's all going to be OK.

Can you share some positive improvements that have happened in your life recently? Personally I am working on getting more professional help for my issues and it's working out well. I'd love to hear some positivity of you people.
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 No.578

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I've been employed for almost two years, which is the longest I've held a job, it's just a part time job with very little social interaction but I think that's the only reason I've stayed here. I was asked about a promotion but it also meant more hours so I declined, because I think I know myself enough to know it'd cause me problems sooner than later. I wish I was normal enough to accept it and make more money though.

I also self-harmed very frequently since my teens, and I'm probably about 90% better than I used to be. I went from doing it weekly to very rarely, and it's never nearly as bad as it was. Part of it is the fact I work, and I can't really go to work with cuts because it'd be hard hiding it.

That said, I sometimes miss when I self-harmed a lot and just stayed in my room all day every day, there's a weird comfort in just feeling hopeless and not looking forward to the future. Does anyone else have moments like this?

 No.579

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>>578
I feel you, I am technically doing better for myself but I just feel tired and jaded and can't work full time to save my life. I actually made my availability less because working 5 days a week was just too much for me. I greatly miss the quiet life of waking up and not having to go to work or college every day. Work just feels draining and I haven't cleaned my room up in days because I just feel stressed from work and stressed about having to go to work again the next day.

 No.580

>>578
>Does anyone else have moments like this?
It's as if time stops moving and I go back to a place where the future was far away, and I'm the only thing that matters.

 No.581

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after years of job hunting, i landed myself a position at a fast food chain around a month ago and im genuinely happy.

the job is not anything spectacular, but i have much better perfecting my social interaction w/ others because that was something that needed a big improvement in my life. it comes with a lot of confidence too, which ive built up. i personally take anti-depressants and i still see a therapist but im pretty happy overall.

 No.583

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I'm currently receiving professional help, been taking antidepressants and medication to treat my severe anxiety, trying to not going back into the self-harming cycle (1 month free from it!).
I feel so alienate from society, like i don't fit here at all, but thanks to having the help i need i make little efforts of going outside everyday. Sometimes i miss the quietness of waking up in my room, in my safe space, and not having to spend my time outside of my room, but i've never been this happy to be able to wake up and just be glad that i can see another day. I just wish my brain worked properly because it's too loud and noisy and it never shuts up



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 No.528[Reply]

i read through the recent thread about getting diagnosed and it resonated with me a lot, since i am unmedicated (talking to therapist, we both agree something is wrong with my brain) and currently just a complete failure in college due to my executive dysfunction. just bombed the first test of the course, and it dawned on me that staying like this is not sustainable in the slightest (not that i was ever under the impression it was), so i want to change this while i am still just starting out, before it's too late. i have tried sheer-willpower-ing and it has not worked well at all, my brain is shockingly easy to distract.
so i'd like to ask, what are some tips/tricks/methods/whatever you find useful that helps you get things done despite having executive dysfunction?

 No.529

File: 1701087618942.jpeg (43.25 KB, 529x651, A59A71A1-6D93-4ED6-9086-A….jpeg)

Counting tends to help me. Very short countdowns that are constant. So like, if I’m procrastinating I shower, sometimes I count myself to stand up, then I count again to start walking, count to turn on the shower, etc. no real pressure, just ‘three two one’ and I stand up. Doing the steps towards the actual tasks like this makes it a bit easier for me to get to the task. It isn’t foolproof though, unfortunately.

 No.530

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keeping track of things seems to really help me. if theres a way you can throw all of your to-do stuff in one (or several centralized) lists it makes it easier to know what it is that needs to be done and what can be prioritized. using a personal discord server for just that has helped a lot of people i know, and goblin.tools seems like a good place to start if youre stuck on where to start on a task. >>529 is very good advice too. ive also heard "just do 5 minutes" of a thing and you'll either get engrossed in the task and just do it, or you'll have 5 minutes of work done which is better than nothing

 No.582

File: 1717045061684.png (1.67 MB, 868x1228, ClipboardImage.png)

hii, op here. a lot has happened since when i first made this post and i just wanted to give an update of some kind i guess
firstly, >>529 and >>530 are genuinely really great pieces of advice, and did help me be a bit more productive. but at the end of the day they ended up not being enough on its own lol

i did however manage to get properly diagnosed with adhd after pursuing it for a few months, and was also able to get on adhd meds for the first time!
and holy shit the difference is shocking lol. it feels surreal to actually be able to do things at all, and at least for me there's a sense of relief knowing that i'm not just lazy like my parents used to say all the time
it does make me wonder how i was able to get anything done before i was on meds lmao, it's kinda jarring seeing how differently my brain is actually supposed to work

overall, getting diagnosed was a huge game changer, and i'm honestly feeling a little bit more hopeful about the future, oddly enough

idk why i wanted to give an update on this, but yeah, here it is
hope whoever's reading this has a great day! :)



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 No.27[Reply]

Since I graduated from University in June I've been planning on going back to do a Master's or a PhD. For what it's worth, I graduated with (I think) the highest grade of my year from a pretty bad university, but I also did a community-related EC and was the recipient of a research scholarship in my second year.
I spent a few months putting together the best applications I could, but made the mistake of aiming too high and only applying for a few difficult to get in to universities. So far I've heard back from 2 of the places I applied, both were rejections, and I'm not feeling too confident about the other 3.
Right now I'm panicking, because it's become abundantly clear that I've wasted the last 8 months and several hundred dollars doing basically nothing. I told myself I'd get an article written but I've been completely unable to get anything done because of all the uncertainty.
In a last-ditch effort, I'm putting together a PhD application to send to places that are still accepting applicants and might be able to supervise it. But, again, I'm not too hopeful about this.
I really do not know what to do if this doesn't pan out. I can't find any jobs that I'm not either over or under qualified for.
Someone suggested I become an assistant language teacher, but I am not comfortable at all with living alone somewhere where I don't speak the language after being a recluse for over a year.
14 posts and 7 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.466

>>27
I feel you too anon. I got into a top school but I just can't afford to go, no way for my broke ass to finance it. I should be applying to other more affordable places but I can't motivate myself to even get out of bed. All I do is browse the chans all day and try to ignore life. Just wish I could upload myself onto the internet and not deal with this shit.

 No.499

>>453
>da office
hahahaha

 No.574

File: 1712725985653.png (10.71 KB, 471x470, 1593217045348.png)

It's been another year so I may as well give another update.
After my contract ended in April 2023 I was a NEET again until last February. I somehow managed to get a bunch of interviews at some incredibly high-profile places but I think I was too autistic in the interview for all of them. Eventually I found another part-time research job in February, which has been pretty comfy (and way, way below the skillset they were asking for - a PhD was preferred for a role that has just been printing things off and proofing things for other people). So I can't really complain too much.
I've also been offered a spot on two doctoral programs. One is 4 years and offers a full scholarship with just enough of a stiped to live off but I'd have to move to Asia for it. I've not heard back on funding from the other one yet but it's only 3 years and has a (much) better reputation, so I'd prefer to go there. Either way I'm making progress. For the first time in a very long time I'm not worried about the future.

 No.575

>>574
As someone who's considering doing a PhD, your post fills me with hope, anon

 No.576

>>575
I'm glad you found this useful. If nothing else I want this thread to show that you can do stuff with enough ability, effort and patience.
Best of luck with your applications, and consider applying internationally, especially if you need the money. Anecdotally, I had two interviews for PhDs in the Netherlands last year and both paid very well. I understand Switzerland pays very well, too. The University of [spoler]Hong Kong[/spoiler] offers funding with every place but it's barely enough to live off, unless you get the big fellowship, in which case it pays very well.



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 No.521[Reply]

19 years old and i recently ditched the whole neet lifestyle and got myself a job. genuinely sucks so much and i thought it would change a lot for me but if anything it ruined my life.

my parents started making me pay rent a few months ago and since august my government income (which was around $400) has dropped down to $68 a month, absolutely nowhere near enough to pay rent.

she told me if i wanted to stay in the house i had to get a job. now i'm a cleaner at my old high school which is so embarrassing. and i feel like the kids at school stare at me and it's been pulling at my mental health

i stay up all night and play video games so i always sleep late. my shift starts at 3pm and ends at 6pm. by the time i get home it's already too late for me to want to eat, and since i've started working this has become a daily thing, where i only eat dinner on the weekends because i'm not away working

seriously want to quit this job and go back to the way i was living before, but i know it's not a healthy alternative at all… what do i do?

 No.522

try and find a different job! that sounds like a fucking nightmare. there might be some programs for like welders or electricians who will train you and you can make decent money. you do have a lot of options right now and thats very scary. but sometimes you just gotta point yourself in a direction and see what happens. itll take a few tried to find a place that doesnt suck ass

 No.543

Watch movies about janitors. I remember seeing this one about a girl who was Ivy league bound but ruined her life by drunk driving.

 No.559

find a different job with more agreeable hours. already having a job actually makes getting a new one a lot easier. hell, you'll probably make more money too, it sounds like you only work three hours a day? seek elsewhere

 No.573

have you thought of applying for NEETbux? (check the unle reimus guide).



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 No.250[Reply]

Just got a job today. I'm probably going to quit or get fired again, but, let's see how this goes

I will try to keep this thread up as a "journal" in hopes of helping or motivation another anon to do as I did today
47 posts and 13 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

 No.423

>>416
>Basically Ive mustered up the courage to ask for a job at a local computer store.
it's for the better, sales jobs are brutal unless you're a sociopath / psychopath since your job is literally to lie all day

 No.424

>>416
you aren't letting us down. I'm very proud of you for challenging yourself and trying

 No.425

File: 1668694246086.png (140 KB, 367x137, index.png)

>>423
Thanks. I told the owner that I would prefer having a job in the back where I'd fix and build computers but I think he needed someone on the front desk. I'm not good at talking to people at all and obviously he picked up on that. I asked two other stores the day after I wrote 416 and both told me that they weren't hiring. I found 2 more stores (and one far away but seems promising. Might have to learn to take the bus for that but I'm willing) hope I update with good news next time!

>>423
Thank you, I really do appreciate still having this thread supporting me. On top of not being able to hold a convo for long I also didn't want to trick people and sell them junk. In a way I'm glad I didn't get hired over working to lie to people.

Have a good day guys. Slowly but surely we're making it.

 No.426

>>425
I should mention, I was also really anxious on the first time I asked for a job at a computer store. Remember to collect yourselves before doing stuff like this, I got too excited and didn't think of it. Maybe I would've gotten the job perhaps? But that's not what I'll think of right now. I can't control everything and that's fine.

(also, correction I meant to reply to 424 on the second reply. to clear confusion)

>>417

>but we all get better with practice right?


Yes we do. I'm glad I know this first hand. I hope I've helped or motivated some of you to do so as well

 No.571

>>250
Hope life is going well for you textile anon



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 No.509[Reply]

Every Hikki is secretly a cocoon. Some of our cocoons are bright yet brooding and just waiting to pop! Others are dark and gristled without much life left in them. Every cocoon can grow if left in peace long enough, though many are pushed and prodded in all the wrong ways and may never get the chance. I hope your cocoon pops uboaling, it's time to wake up if you can.
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 No.545

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 No.546

File: 1706203975090.jpg (1.09 MB, 1200x924, Moi_go_moimfrens.jpg)

>>541
>>545
good posts!

 No.547

a hikki is a mans fingertips curled at the door

ht

 No.548

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 No.560

File: 1708822827118.gif (765.58 KB, 500x281, grosmoke.gif)




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 No.550[Reply]

i dropped out of highschool due to extreme stress.. im now finally trying to get my ged but i keep procrastinating making calls. how do i get motivation? im not the best at math and i know its going to be a dreadful process

 No.551

File: 1707430229521.jpeg (53.53 KB, 314x314, B94803E5-317C-4780-B594-F….jpeg)

firstly, big boss posting realness

Secondly, procrastination is a huge bitch. I’m still flaking on making some calls for surgery honestly, so you’re not alone. I’d suggest just taking them one at a time. Easier to motivate yourself for one than for like, five. Taking things slowly and at one’s own pace is what Highschool usually prevents, they expect you to work at everyone else’s level. If you’re working to your own pace now, then you can take things one at a time. That should make motivation easier.

Don’t quote me on that though, lol

 No.553

you need to light a fire under your ass and realize how easily shitty your life could get or how easily good your life could be

 No.556

hello,op here i finally did it and i started my classes. thank u kangel…

 No.557

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>>556
K-angel poster here! glad to hear it! Just keep at it, make sure you put your needs first if other shit gets in the way and you’ll do something! Still haven’t made my own calls but I’ll get to them eventually. Getting motivation is still a bitch…. 🙏BLESS🙏



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