/rec/ - Ex-NEET / Recovery

I've decided to exercise and eat healthy go back to my hobbies and interests, which I've basically abandoned for most of the year. I managed to make some money recently and decided I'll spend on something for once to reward my hard work. Maybe I'll buy a comfy new cushion or a plushie? Something I can squeeze.

It was my birthday recently! I got a lot of nice gifts from family and friends and I’m feeling really loved. This isn’t as recent anymore, but I also moved out of an abusive home situation and I’ve been feeling way more relaxed. It’s helped me to a lot of introspection. Plus, I’m getting back in contact with old friends, which is always nice. Despite how bad my heads getting, it’s been pretty good for me recently. I even got an A++ grade on an assignment! So I’ve been buying myself a lot of nice things as a reward. It’s gotten so peaceful.

Been feeling a lot brighter this winter, excited about life and the future. The always present gloomy and hopeless feeling that wouldn't go away has been fading and I've felt much better. Can't pinpoint what worked, but it's probably a combination things: I've coldly cut my internet usage, seen effort to have real life interactions and kept engaging in some simple hobbies. Might also simply be that I've just grown more emotionally mature.

Anyway wish everyone luck, take care of yourselves.

>>561
> I've coldly cut my internet usage, seen effort to have real life interactions and kept engaging in some simple hobbies. Might also simply be that I've just grown more emotionally mature.
Sounds good. What irks me is that those are things I have thought about doing too. I don't know what to do outside of the Internet though. There is nobody I would like to have interactions with and I have no hobbies.

>>554
I've been going outside more and doing the C25K program, and I've made it to week 4. This year I've also tried again at completing the Australian version of getting my GED (dropped out last year because a guy kept making comments about me and made me too ashamed and embarrassed to go outside). I've had more than a few moments where my insecurity and shame and low self worth have made me break down crying, but I've pushed past the desire to drop out so far. I've completed the first part of the year, and I think maybe I can manage to make it back into society by the end of the year at 21.

I've been employed for almost two years, which is the longest I've held a job, it's just a part time job with very little social interaction but I think that's the only reason I've stayed here. I was asked about a promotion but it also meant more hours so I declined, because I think I know myself enough to know it'd cause me problems sooner than later. I wish I was normal enough to accept it and make more money though.

I also self-harmed very frequently since my teens, and I'm probably about 90% better than I used to be. I went from doing it weekly to very rarely, and it's never nearly as bad as it was. Part of it is the fact I work, and I can't really go to work with cuts because it'd be hard hiding it.

That said, I sometimes miss when I self-harmed a lot and just stayed in my room all day every day, there's a weird comfort in just feeling hopeless and not looking forward to the future. Does anyone else have moments like this?

>>578
I feel you, I am technically doing better for myself but I just feel tired and jaded and can't work full time to save my life. I actually made my availability less because working 5 days a week was just too much for me. I greatly miss the quiet life of waking up and not having to go to work or college every day. Work just feels draining and I haven't cleaned my room up in days because I just feel stressed from work and stressed about having to go to work again the next day.

>>578
>Does anyone else have moments like this?
It's as if time stops moving and I go back to a place where the future was far away, and I'm the only thing that matters.

after years of job hunting, i landed myself a position at a fast food chain around a month ago and im genuinely happy.

the job is not anything spectacular, but i have much better perfecting my social interaction w/ others because that was something that needed a big improvement in my life. it comes with a lot of confidence too, which ive built up. i personally take anti-depressants and i still see a therapist but im pretty happy overall.

I'm currently receiving professional help, been taking antidepressants and medication to treat my severe anxiety, trying to not going back into the self-harming cycle (1 month free from it!).
I feel so alienate from society, like i don't fit here at all, but thanks to having the help i need i make little efforts of going outside everyday. Sometimes i miss the quietness of waking up in my room, in my safe space, and not having to spend my time outside of my room, but i've never been this happy to be able to wake up and just be glad that i can see another day. I just wish my brain worked properly because it's too loud and noisy and it never shuts up

I finally after 6 years of recovery have gone from hikki NEET unable to leave the house to actually having a good job that pays well… I spent the last two days in bed playing video games and watching anime til the early morning with the understanding that I probably will never be able to do this again, so wanted to send it off properly..

i handed in my last assignment at university today… i dropped out twice and i just turned 30 but i actually finally managed to finish. its weird to think that up until 5 years ago i was a hikkineet still and had been since the end of highschool.

im sort of recovering. for about 2 years i isolated myself from everyone but i've tried making a discord server recently to get my old friends to start talking to me again. it's sorta been working, i now have one friend who i get lunch with on wednesdays and i voice chat with some old friends occasionally–but i'm pretty sure the guy i get lunch with only attends because i pay for his lunch. outside of these times i avoid talking to anyone.

>>617
Congrats. You are at where I hope to be in a couple years.

>>617
congrats anon!

i never would have thought i'd become such a normie. soon to be working a full-time job in an open-office sort of space… then, next year i am going to start a new program to learn echocardiography…

I've had a work at home job for a bit now that I'm using to save money to go back to school. It feels like the only way for me to ever get a chance at socially integrating with the world again is to go back to college. I am nervous at the prospect of being 28 or even 29 by the time it finally happens though. What? I'll graduate at 32-33? Better late than never but sad to think about really even if everything goes well. The idea that others are done at 22 is insane to me, I'm filled with both envy and horror all at once when I let myself think about it.

>>648
My friend who I met going back is in the thick of it at 33. Another thing you probably don't want to think about is that we'll have much shorter lives than normies.

>>649
>we'll have much shorter lives than normies
says who