I am still here… I guess. I hope.
This whole situation of the world is not helping, it is really hard to travel right now. But I do have something to share.
It was not long ago, someone contatcted me in toxchat. Since it is not easy to contact me over there, I decided to listen. He said he had something that might help. And, man I was in for a ride. It took me some time to give it a shot, but eventually I remembered that I would try anything and everything possible.
So I set off. To the US, once again, how could it be any different. Once there, the man gave me his address, and it took me another day to reach it. Turns out the man lived in a small city, middle of nowhere. He had almost no money so I had to pay for everything. But I was certanily curious.
His house was old, but decent. His grandmother met me, she was very old, he told me that she would ask some questions. "I'm here to see Brian", I was supposed to say, and nothing much else. She seemed suspicious of something, but eventually let me in."He is down there", she said, and went to sit down in a couch."Down where" I thought, before realizing an open door which led to flight of stairs.
While I did not know what to expected, I was not hoping for much. Down there was a normal basement, I knocked at the door, and 'Brian', just said 'Come in, come in'. No dramas, no surprises. I mean, not much surprises.
The basement was his room, which apparently he did not like to leave. It was somewhat dirty, and messy. But what caught my attention was the posters. He had the usual otaku posters, lots of Yume Nikki ones, but he also had many posters with cosplayers in them.
The man was clearly and adult, but not really that old, he was your avarage fat otaku, but twenty years older. "She's is here, man, come here!", he did not ask anything, he already knew why I was there for. I got a bit nervous when he said 'She is here', but kept my calm. He then sat on a chair in front a computed. "Look, man. It's her! It is Mado, man!". I got close to see what he was talking about, and, in the computer screen there was someone. "It is Madotsuki, look", he said.
It was not Madotsuki, of course. It was fucking booger-chan. This man had hundreds of pictures of booger-chan on his computer. Only hen I noticied that all cosplayers posters were Boogerchan. He told me he was absolute sure that Booger-chan was Mado 'in this world'. He even talked about those vlogs she made. He said he was happy to meet someone with a similar 'obssession' about Mado, and said my thread helped him see that, almost ten years ago.
He said he also wanted to hug Mado, meaning, he wanted to hug booger-chan. But he was too affraid of leaving his house. He wanted my help somehow. At that point I was afraid he could be a stalker or something. But after talking for a while, I realized he had none of her personal info. He truly believes she is a Mado of this world, and believed that I could be some sort of 'bridge' to find her. And also that if I hugged booger-chan, I would fullfill my dream as well.
I do not believe he is dangerous or anything, he is just delusional (maybe like myself). I tried to convince him that booger-chan is not Mado, but he really wanted me to try hugging her to 'see it for myself', to which I said 'I will see what I can do', and then talked myself out of his house.
I don't know how much of all that he believes, but the fact that he thinks we are alike, really got me thinking.
Anyway, Brian, I know you are reading this. You are a nice guy, but I will not try to hug boogerchan, she is probably a woman now, with a family and a life. She is not Mado. If you have any other clue that could help, I will gladly hear you again.
So, yeah, the quest goes on. Year by year, step by step. It is difficult, but there are still things to be done.