>>2446Thank you. I'm very happy you read my dream.
The landscapes inside of my dreams are usually quite detailed and terrifying. Language does not really suffice to explain the element of terror. Every night I go to sleep I find myself in places that make The Mist look like happy hour. Angel's Egg represents a foreboding feeling for me with its abandoned and desolate nature so it often presents itself as a recurring location. I don't consider it a good or welcome setting for a dream, it really just signifies that a living hell is approaching. Signals such as this only serve to completely dismantle my sleeping state and end with me waking up in a pained frenzy. I can't recover from these dreams for a few hours as the level of detail they fall into is beyond words. Only the dreams that bring terror will go into such detail. The supposed good ones are just forgotten. As a result, my brain subconsciously wishes for nightmares and tries to manipulate itself whilst in a sleeping state towards it's own worst fears and nightmares. It's disappointingly and masochistically brutal, yet produces significant results.
I've never had a home myself, so I never dreamt of a home, only rooms and buildings which bear familiarity to the real world. My mind without a doubt challenges me every single night by subjecting me to evil and terrifying nightmares. I say this with complete assurance that my subconscious realizes that I am weak. It desires to strengthen my resolve through torture. Lately I can dream of the most despicable trash without batting an eye. Spiders can remove my eyes with their overgrown fangs and claws, Satan can spirit me away to hell on a boat made out of flesh, it's all just the same. I have grown accustomed to nightmares and they are the norm. Good dreams no longer represent their intentions or exist in a focused state.
I was completely conscious that it was a dream. Every dream for me is a lucid dream. I have complete control and awareness over my sleeping state despite the fact that I've never wished for it, and it's even more terrifying as a result. I experience sleep paralysis, hallucinations and nightmares nearly every single night and haven't felt relief in eons. It's fucking terrifying. I've adjusted to wake up during sleep 3 times per night to jot down happenings before returning to my dreams. These notes are so disgustingly detailed and familiar that I refuse to share them. The subconscious is a nightmare within itself.