/rec/ - Ex-NEET / Recovery

>>805
>They don't have any values, any morals, nothing is sacred to them.
>not even my most trusted friends, seem to care about any of the same things as me.
>because they are so flippant and careless about things that matter deeply to me and have no desire to change.
You want them to care about something that is tied to morality. With the way you speak of needing people to care about this one thing to be your friend, you sound like some kind of heavily radicalized activist, correct me if I am wrong, and I'm not saying there's anything wrong with it, live your life how you want it, however your standards for having friends seem far too high, of course there are things I care about, but I don't care if my friends care or not about them, not everybody needs to think like me about those things(or anyone for that matter)
So it wouldn't matter if I told you how I made friends because that probably wouldn't work for you, but if you're curious, I knew most of them at the gym, and some of them in MMORPGs, there's exactly 8 guys I consider friends and 1 of them is actually oppose to most of the most serious things I believe in.(no girls for some reason)

For the most part I was the one initiating conversation, the bottom line is there's plenty of other people that didn't remain friends.

Looks like you got two choices, tell new people about this "thing" you care about and make it your filter, or lower your standards.

>>807
love the way you immediately made this about yourself

>>808
Of course you love it, because there's nothing wrong with it and is in fact spot on. Thank you for appreciating it.

OP is asking for advice, talking about my personal experience to use as example is perfectly fair, especially when I specify precisely that when I say my experiences would probably not work on OP.

I also love your response. I love the part where you discard half of the post that doesn't speak about my experience at all just so you can say I make it about me.

I love the use of the word "immediately" as well, because I don't start talking about my experience until the last part of my post.

>>809
you write like lair4anon lol

>How do you guys make friends?
Idk honestly. it kinda happens in social events or online in groups chat, another (yet virtual) social gathering.
I don't have many close friends. got lucky enough to keep contacts and stick with childhood friends. these are the first ones i can consider close. and then the next ones are old internet friends from imageboards that we happen to have stuck around with eachother for a long time. We are all in the same group chat, but (I) have limited 1:1 talks privately with them. only a few i talk to regularly. and that's it. that's my friend circle.
there's other people i know, but i'd be more comfortable calling them acquaintances at best. details about them are fuzzy at best. Humans can only properly keep up with so few friends, you know?

>I really don't want to invest a lot of time and effort into new friendships just so they can let me down years later too. I don't know what to do.
See, the thing is that forming these connections and maintaining them, for me, never felt like it required actual effort. I don't think it should, for anyone, either. it felt like i was passively participating in building a friendship, while i am doing this whole socializing thing. that last part is what drains my battery and makes me go reclusive to do my own things. I wanna play a team game? Well let's grab a couple folks that wants to, too. the purpose is to play the game and i'm creating a connection in the process. Not always, but sometimes it passively happens.
(I used that example like I still do all of that myself, but the truth is that I don't do that anymore. I used to do it when I was younger playing competitive games. I much prefer to stick to myself nowadays…)

It also helps to be a regular at some place or online space. to be somewhat known by other regulars. these are your acquaintances with who one of em may (finally) click with you and that's when they'll go from acquaintance to a friend. that kind of connection also happens at a job. (I understand where I am posting this to, but in the interest of being comprehensive and sharing my experiences : yeah. it's pretty easy to create acquaintances at a job.)

ig tl;dr : be a regular somewhere. in meatspace or on the wired. it'll just happen.
as for your friends atm : don't think too hard about it. no need to cut contacts if you don't gotta. You'll find folks that align better with your interests and views later.

>not even my most trusted friends, seem to care about any of the same things as me
Well. What do you care about?
Do you even care about the stuff your friends are into, at least?