/hikki/ - NEET / Advice

Not a NEET exactly but I grew up with anxiety issues because of an overbearing mother. I was feeling like I was getting better ever since I started college but the pandemic has made my issues worse because of having to take classes online which made me not able to focus well. I was also trying to get over my anxiety issues when talking to people.

I am thinking of taking a break but my mother wants me to take classes part time so I won't struggle. I am unsure about my major since the pandemic threw it in the gutter. I haven't picked my classes yet and feel like I'm wasting time and money. My mother is worried about me since I don't really leave home to exercise or anything since the pandemic has started and I am not taking care of myself as I should.

I do have friends but I only trust a few people in my life due to bullying, unpleasant experiences, and people not understanding me. Even then, my anxiety interferes with situations sometimes. I question or feel like I'm too shy to talk seriously to most of the people I meet online/irl. Most of the time, I put on a mask to hide how nervous I am.

I have a job interview today but I'm trying to have low expectations since I've struggled to find a job ever since I was laid off unfairly years ago. It's gonna be hard not to stutter. I'm mostly afraid of slipping into becoming a NEET because of struggling so much lately.