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/hikki/ - NEET / Advice

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File: 1546888291347.png (446.71 KB, 999x1029, 1542250887423.png)

 No.5407

Has anyone here ever been obsessed with someone for no reason at all? Not in a crush-esque kinda way, just platonic, if that.

For example, I saw someone a while back on a Discord server and they're probably the only person who shares the same interests on the server as I do. I can't get them out of my head and am constantly thinking about doing stuff together. I've got a circle of friends already, but I just feel some sort of a special connection (?) to them. Am I becoming a creep or something?

 No.5408

That just seems like the beginning of a new friendship. It's not creep/stalker behavior in that context, but obviously it could develop into something unhealthy depending on what direction those thoughts take you.
To answer your first question, yes and no. I swore off thinking/worrying about other people ever again after I made the mistake of looking at this person's LinkedIn profile while I was NEET.

 No.5409

all the time, ill just absorb their interests and fantasize of talking to them about their interests but dont know how to, ill even find their facebooks for fun, is that weird, i just want to be dependent on someone

 No.5410

File: 1546933526348.jpg (212 KB, 1920x1080, amiretarded.jpg)

>>5408
> after I made the mistake of looking at this person's LinkedIn profile while I was NEET
Why would that be a mistake?

 No.5411

>>5410
It isn't logical to waste time agonizing over the personal achievements of someone who spends no time whatsoever thinking of you.

 No.5413

i get obsessive over nearly everyone if they talk to me often, either platonically or romantically, almost always the latter. i don't know how to deal with it, and i only understand it to a certain extent. i'm extremely dependent on other people, and i become a complete mess without someone to rely on. i just can't figure out how to live without someone else guiding me along and helping me and stuff like that

 No.5420

File: 1547317887285.jpg (892.95 KB, 600x750, sabi shock.jpg)

I share some of my classes with this seemingly autistic guy. Barely ever talks, no friends, leaves as soon as the situation allows, almost no internet presence, weird mannerisms. Only thing we clearly have in common is a surface-level interest, and even there our tastes diverge.

Seeing what an enigma of a person he is, and seeming like a person I could relate to well, I got it into my head that I had to get to know him and figure him out, that surely something good would come out of it, and so for a while I obsessed about him and paid attention to every minute detail of his existence from the side to write it down later, almost never actually interacting though, since I rarely got the opportunity, and embarrassed myself a shit ton. It got to the point where I hunted down the name of his high school and found old class photographs of him by meticulously going through the Facebook profiles of each student in his generation. Out of all of our interactions, there was only one time that we casually chatted, made jokes and laughed normally, the rest after that always ended on a sour, awkward note, if you could even call them interactions.

In the end, while I spent god knows how much time agonizing over him, he probably just thought I was a pest, considering his body language (which I interpreted as anxiety at first) and now thinks I'm a retard. In hindsight, I'm fucking disgusted with myself. OP, whatever connection you feel to this person, you're partly just deluding yourself. You don't know enough about them for it to be an indication of a good friendship. If you actually start talking to them it's entirely possible that you'll be disappointed like I was and lose interest. So steer yourself, I guess.

Other than that, I check the blog of this person that changes domain a lot every few months, just to see if I can find it again. When I first did it, they had an IP tracker and since mine was from a neighbouring country, they pegged me as a stalker and freaked out. I don't really care about the person themselves, though.

 No.5421

File: 1547342034994.png (346.33 KB, 609x800, 1547315194373.png)

>>5407
sometimes i stumble upon low-viewed youtube videos made by people with disabilities (autism, cerebral palsy, etc) and i get this uncomfortable burning sensation that doesn't go away unless i check their channels/social accounts to make sure they're alright.
This feeling normally goes away after a couple of days, when i completely forget about them.

 No.5422

File: 1547344023062.jpg (287.99 KB, 850x1154, __original_drawn_by_wenqin….jpg)

>>5421
Only schizos and manic depressives get my attention, and it's not because i'm worried e about them.

 No.5423

>>5420
This post scares me slightly, since I'm sure your description of him is how I'm perceived and because there are a couple of people who occasionally engage with me just like you described. I interpreted it as pity before, now I'm worried that I've got some kind of "mysteriousness" to them.

 No.5424

>>5423
In the past, I came across that way to some people. For most, it's more likely to be pity. Anon is just too used to stories about quiet people actually being something extraordinary.

 No.5428

>>5423
Yeah. I just have to say: I'm so sorry.

 No.5429

>>5428
Don't be, I'm sure >>5424 is right. I was just being dumb.

 No.5721

I do this all the time, probably cause autism

sometimes I stalk people I used to know's instagrams for a few hours at a time
there's this one person though that I've been obsessed with for almost two years now, some suicial NEET trans girl that sent in a bunch of questions to my friend on curiouscat for two weeks then just disappeared and never returned
I never even talked to this person but sometimes I feel like we would be really good friends

 No.5723

Tfw no cute girl stalker

 No.5726

>>5723
tfw no cute guy or girl stalkee

 No.5727

File: 1567967565065.jpg (241.82 KB, 2048x2048, INLhRkjzCD.jpg)

When I was in school, I would obsess over girls I knew that mildly looked like anime characters. It wasn't sexual though, I just had this weird urge to hug them. It was the same feeling you feel when you find a new reaction image you like a lot.

 No.5787

I used to obsess with this guy from a japanese culture forum I used to browse a lot in my early teenage years. He was this kind of guy that knew japanese and everything cool about japan, and his influence is half of what made me what I'm today, for better or worse.
Last time I heard of him was 5 years ago and he was a full blown normalfag, married and with only his job as an hobby. I don't want to change.

 No.5793

File: 1571024601048.jpg (5.73 KB, 250x250, dude.jpg)

Yes, I have.
It started out simple enough. I saw a cute girl that piqued my interest while walking home from class. Fluffy light brown hair, vibrant pink clothes, and cute face to go along with it, only a bit powdered with makeup. Her aesthetics really spoke to me. It was really the innocence she vibrated that spoke to me. The feelings i felt for her (or do I still have those feelings?) were truly platonic. I felt a bit of savior complex thinking about her. I wanted to protect her from things that would never happen. I even dreamt once that while walking in the dark streets she gets mugged, and I happen to stumble upon the two and beat the mugger into submission. My obsession grew stronger and stronger. I found out more about her. She likes used to live in another state, does art, and likes pokemon to an extent. I found out her name through a yearbook and with a quick google search I found basically all of her social media. But enough about her, back to the story. We have about the same route home, so I took her route in hopes she wouldn't notice. I almost found it out, but she caught my following her about my third time. My friend found out about my so-called "crush" on this girl and told her that I liked her. The distance between me and the girl grows longer as not only does she know I like her, but thinks I'm a creep stalker freak when I'm not.
God I'm so self conscious
I just want to love someone and have them love me

 No.5796

It would occasionally happen when I found someone I really clicked with in school due to a shared interest and outlook. I would always seek him/her out to talk to and would often prioritize and look forward to meeting him/her. Sometimes I would feel insecure about it and try to stay away from them more, and eventually we would grow apart.

 No.5797

It never happened to me

 No.5811

i actually have a ton of people online that i stalk and imagine cultivating friendships with

i'm too far gone socially though

 No.5812

I don't have anything to contribute beyond the fact I do the exact same thing >>5811 does.

 No.5893

yeah.
i've been following the same group of writers for three years across tumblrs, across twitters, across chatzy, but they're growing steadily more secretive with their writing, (e.g. you have to submit a few pieces of your own to gain access to their discord channels or whatever). it's somewhat stressful but i guess i've gotta move on/keep what i have on me and get rolling

 No.6112

>>5811
I never really imagined creating a real friendship back when I had internet friends but I did daydream a lot about meeting them in public and having quick conversation, I actually rehearsed some lines and had imaginary conversations with myself as practice in case if that happened, even though I knew none lived anywhere near me.

 No.6117

That's called love.

 No.6123

>>5407
>Has anyone here ever been obsessed with someone for no reason at all? Not in a crush-esque kinda way, just platonic, if that.
When I was younger, I used to hero-worship internet friends and obsessively check for new things they'd post to forums. It would always be one person at a time. Thankfully, I don't think I ever made it obvious to them, and I stopped doing it.

 No.6124

File: 1586074837671.jpg (89.03 KB, 512x512, 3566.jpg)

>>5407
Very relatable, especially when I was younger. There have been figures on the internet with many niche hobbies that I've shared. When I was obsessed with these types of people, I eventually found alt accounts which were very easy to find. Of course those alts eventually lead to me finding their telegram handles, their steam, which directed to me finding their friends, which then lead to me finding even more about them. It was very embarrassing each time when I had to cut ties with all of these seemingly likeminded individuals on the net, because they thought I was some guy trying to "fuck up their life" by knowing all of this shit that was readily available online. There was only one special case where that didnt happen and I still talk to him today; but even then, when I archived and reup'd stuff he used to post online, he also got creeped out, but doesnt seem to care now

 No.6222

Any time I find a new content creator on Youtube that I like, I pretty obsessively read their old posts to get more of an insight into their lives. Especially if there's any insinuation/change that they might be gay. Finding "proof" of their sexuality is a huge payoff for me.

I've also combed through the entire social media history of my significant other and kept all the photos that I considered worth keeping. There's something very addicting about knowing everything public about a person, almost like consuming all the works of an artist.

 No.6232

this is normal, just be careful and don't date them. they're usually jerks.

 No.6286

File: 1603480951440.png (1.01 MB, 1280x720, kwm-e27-01-another-prevert….png)

>>5407
i know exactly that feeling. as i learn more about the person i am stalking the more plasure(dopamin hit, like eating sugar) i get, then after a while it becomes boring and i change person. probebly because i have no internet or irl friends

 No.6414

>>5407 yes i have felt that. I used frequent a bunch of art communities, and i found this one israelite girl who seemed to have The 'Tism. Her art and english were very bad but there was such a 'nice person' aura to her and i often thought about me messaging her privately and then becoming friends. I used to check on her a lot and her art had improved, i felt really happy, it was like seeing a baby's first steps or something, but eventually got bored and forgot her usernames.

On the becoming a creep thing, i think you shouldn't worry too much, the outcome depends in wether you actually interact or not and, if you do the former, the way you do it. Most people detect creeps easily so if you make them uncomfortable they will most likely stop interacting.

Judging by the replies this seems to be fairly common… wonder what this phenomenon means

 No.6415

>>6414
you're such a pos

 No.6463

It's dangerouns to obsess over someone AND not interact with them. That's an easy path to idealizations and false expectations and that never ends well for anyone involved.

 No.6473

Every so often I get really horny and watch a lot of porn. I get paranoid about porn being deleted from the internet forever so I save it on my hard drives. Every so often, I stumble on a relatively unknown pornstar who is attractive, but usually retired or mainly only does a bit of modeling and selective paid porn clips on clips4sale or something. I usually get really invested in them and track their social media, and if they aren't active or oddly stopped being active somewhat recently, I try to track down anyone that may know their status. I download as much of their catalog as I can find that is available anywhere online and they don't leave my head for maybe weeks or even months. Especially if they are still silent on social media and that small connection I may feel will be gone.

 No.6475

>>5407
There's a person I've known online for over a year that I wanted to get in touch with in a "I want to be friends with you" way. Recently I started thinking about it again, and for a few weeks I struggled with an urge to message them. Eventually, I cold emailed them a short message, they saw it and I got a response. That got rid of this specific uncertainty and got it off my mind. I wrote multiple drafts before I ended up with the one I sent.

 No.6477

>feel like a creep
>check favorite dead board
>whole ass thread of fags doing the same shit
>feel better

 No.6566

File: 1620181015137.jpeg (19.38 KB, 474x363, picardia.jpeg)

>>6477
feels good to know you aren't the only fucking dumbass that does shit that may be weird

 No.6571

>>5407
I've fallen in love with someone over the internet who I didn't know what they look like.

 No.7869

File: 1700570179141.jpeg (4.78 MB, 5000x5179, mirror.jpeg)

i think its a nice thing to become obsessed with a person, because most people dont seem to care deeply about someone they love
its such a weird thing when you become more aware of a person's living presence, that they're really sentient and actively thinking and living, and you feel like loneliness cant possibly exist
i dont think i've felt that way about other people for a long time, its always just felt like a two dimensional connection

 No.7872

File: 1701040951064.jpg (467.38 KB, 1280x1008, tumblr_3f77d310adfdfd5ee44….jpg)

It wasn't "platonic", but this reminds me of what was probably my best relationship. Finding a person who felt very attracted to me, with whom I could share video game soundtracks, play video games, watch and share similar series, be on video calls until we fell asleep, our inside jokes and.. "do more intimate things"

Until some events like one of his friends feeling jealous of us, he tried to make us break up by telling me that the person was cheating on me by showing me out-of-context screenshots from a long time ago. Being an idiotic teenager, I let myself be carried away by the wrong thoughts (although in the end he got tired of the situation and started dating someone else behind my back until I found out about the unpleasant surprise). Unfortunately, my teenage self got carried away by imaginary jealousy until it stopped being imaginary and we decided to break up. After about 2 years he wrote to me again practically out of nowhere and I was surprised despite what he had done to me in the past. But apparently, it was no longer really that love that he felt for me, but rather a genuine obsession with me (because come on, the same person told me about it in an essay type message) and he decided to get away from me for the good of both of us.



After a while he started following me on social media again and we talked a little, until I decided to abandon all social media. I wish I could find someone to share interests, but socializing as an autistic person is a pain in the ass.

 No.7874

File: 1701230880308.gif (825.61 KB, 498x498, 25cd76052287485071c29c0fa3….gif)

i will fixate on people who i consider to be above me artistically and grind myself into dust thinking "what would this person think about this or that?" sometimes its things that make sense, like about my art, but it happened with this one person so pervasively theres a chance i'll think about them when i change my fucking diva cup.

 No.7875

File: 1701360110268.jpg (42.08 KB, 432x650, 4668_p0.jpg)

id like to but nobody is interesting enough

 No.7876

File: 1701393475052.jpg (54.17 KB, 564x568, 665a26fbbf2b3ea0aed6d28715….jpg)

yes 10000% honestly im not even sure if ive ever had a romantic crush on someone i think it all has just been some weird idolizing obsession type thing

 No.7877

Yup unfortunately i kind of try to replicate them and try to steal their like vibe or mood they give off and try to do the same thing as them and be as good as them and passionate. But i get depressed or i simply give up because they have been doing a certain thing for years and i can't hope to become like them within a month.

 No.7879

I stalk someone I know only from reading some MMO forum and some guy's Twitter because his art is cool, solely because they seem to share my interests but are so out of my reach I would never actually talk to either of them as I am an autistic freak.

 No.7911

Yes. I've met some people who have qualities I wish I had, I tend to copy them/try to be more like a them. If I can't be like them, being around them is good too.

 No.8092

File: 1714912405130.jpg (426.58 KB, 1200x1317, hug.jpg)

I had multiple obsessions with several girls in the past few years. I would not put them in the platonic category exactly (I've imagined each of them as potential gf), but not romantic either (never met them/exchanged a single word irl).

It got pretty bad when I found a lot of personal info about all of them, which meant I could never approach any without being creepy. It even happened once: I sent a friend request to one, and surprise surprise, she wasn't very happy to be added by someone with a fairly new account, who happens to know her username…

Being a socially fucked up guy with zero skill or knowledge to date someone, I feel like giving up should be the smartest choice. It always ends terribly for me.

At least I've got my 2D girls to partially fill that void

 No.8093

>>8092
>It got pretty bad when I found a lot of personal info about all of them, which meant I could never approach any without being creepy.
My, my, that is painfully relatable. So many times I just couldn't resist and then the info disbalance became irreversible.

 No.8104

File: 1715899967485.jpg (10.37 KB, 302x225, 1572287595186.jpg)

The exact same thing happened to me. On Discord too. What made it worse was the fact that it was a university-related server, so I could have reached out and met them in person.

I platonically obsessed hard. To cope, I left the server but I still think about them and the friendship we could have had. I don't have any friends at the moment, but I felt like him and I would have gotten along.

 No.8340

File: 1722779834027.png (525.73 KB, 774x1200, 12bb5a336821294cd74f1219aa….png)

there were too many discord lurkers for me to count.
sucks that the best people never say anything. perfect for comfy discussions based on their interests yet none are brave enough to speak up.
i wish it wasn't weird to randomly message them, otherwise they always ignore or leave…

to every lurker out there: I LOVE YOU PLEASE DON'T BE SCARED I CAN'T TAKE IT

 No.8341

File: 1722786491970.gif (159.78 KB, 1280x1280, tumblr_ff0bfbc67bfa2fea06f….gif)

>>8340
Every time I try to start a conversation with someone I see some common interest with, I get overwhelmed by the idea of ​​being a nuisance or bothering the person in some way just by saying hello, turning into a phantom member of the server, eventually losing interest and leaving. It depresses me to think if I missed the opportunity to meet someone nice.

 No.8342

File: 1722787349469.jpg (76.76 KB, 622x718, 1722325078826x.jpg)

>>8340
I feel like the flow of discussion on most Discord servers is controlled by a few extremely obnoxious people that make it their goal to have everything revolve around them and shut off anyone not influential enough, and that puts of a lot of sensible people off

 No.8344

File: 1722795628919.jpg (615.73 KB, 1000x1000, watching lurker-sama.jpg)

>>8341
as a non-lurker myself i can guarantee i'd never mind any lurkers to talk to me. i want people to annoy me like that.
you guys can be the nicest people around, and are always subject to interesting convos.
so don't be afraid.
>>8342
seems to be the most common problem nowadays. too many ego-bloated owners with their totalitarian rules, set in tiny dying servers.
sometimes the more sensible ones don't leave, and aren't afraid to comment on the bullshit.
maybe approaching those members wouldn't be a bad idea.

 No.8345

I obsess over other Uboachan.net posters sometimes

 No.8346

File: 1722820581249.png (160.83 KB, 565x454, getobsessed.png)

.

 No.8347

>>5421
I get this but with old videos from inactive channels. I'll see something like an AMV from 2007 or something that reminds me of simpler times and my first instinct is to check if they're still posting either on YouTube or some other social media site.

 No.8349

>>8341
I feel most servers are that group of people that know each other way before, to the point that you may start to think you are in some party that you haven't been invited. Sometimes I would to at least share something, but like >>8342 said, it feels like "everything revolve around them and shut off anyone not influential enough" (without being so exaggerated but noticeable). Discord is a constant fake environment, or is just me with absolutely 0 social skills.

 No.8352

>>8344
Good luck if someone find a person to interact and share things in common. I give up.

 No.8353

File: 1723013304850.jpg (301.92 KB, 700x900, 8546bb6b3de2c159b819be3948….jpg)

>>8352
What do you want to share in common, anon? Maybe someone from here will find you

 No.8357

File: 1723178873630.png (436.16 KB, 1024x729, accordeon_by_louysecosa_dg….png)

>>8340
I do love you anon as well. To be completely honest I'm just trying to learn to be less of a loner, because I feel like things and especially interpersonal relationships will never go anywhere with people.

 No.8358

>>8357
Did you mean to say "without" or am I misunderstanding?

 No.8361

>>8345
How do you tell the difference?

 No.8362

File: 1723247276696.jpg (1.15 MB, 3652x3815, gudon_udon__ccac32cbee7ec6….jpg)

>>8361
I don't need to, one post or a series of posts is enough to set me off
Plus it's fun to "assemble" anons by arbitrarily choosing posts I like that don't contradict each other and crediting them to one person

 No.8418

>>8362
ok schizo

 No.8419

lol

 No.8421

yeah, i get oddly attached and obsessive about anons if they say things i agree with.

 No.8423

File: 1723674383495.jpg (794.95 KB, 3200x3847, __original_and_2_more_draw….jpg)

>>8418
Ah, you must be that one anon who always responds negatively to me, I know your ways… a real tsun relationship we're having…

 No.8424

File: 1723674560794.png (62.63 KB, 386x315, factzone.png)

>>8423
dont worry, i still love and adore you!

 No.8426

File: 1723682786557.jpg (616.98 KB, 2048x2048, 1722751631612525.jpg)

>>8424
Oh my, too much, that's too much, good anon! Don't just say something so kind all of sudden! Just watch as I fumble with my response

 No.8485

File: 1724274065322.jpg (78.26 KB, 564x702, strabwey.jpg)

Been like this since I was 15, it never got better.

 No.8486

Yeah irl this has caused me a lot of problems. I get platonic crushes on people and go out of my way to impress them in the most retarded ways which has the opposite effect of pushing them away leading relationships to collapse into insane drama and chaos which almost ends up ruining life. since the last time this happened (about 7 years ago) I've been living as a loner essentially.

 No.8488

>>8342
discords full of faggy zoomers with broccoli haircuts and spongebob profile pictures telling you to kill yourself

 No.8515

File: 1725391388778.png (468.84 KB, 700x1200, f99dc6461a466142768f5695d9….png)

>>8342
Today I tried to join a discord community about a common hobby. 400 members. Half of the server emotes were photos of the moderators and long-time members. Left in absolute disgust

 No.8516

>>8515
Discord demography

 No.8565

File: 1727255591519.png (1.02 MB, 823x880, FtshLrHWIA0Fpu7.png)

>>8488
Gehhh, I dislike so much negativity but I can't help but agree. Public discords r such a cesspit but there's no real good way to browse and see a shit ton of discords. The only thing I really know is disboards and not once have I had anything fulfilling from that.

The only good servers I've ever been on are random private ones that have some link placed somewhere, and then from those getting invited to an ultra priv one. It's weird to think how far my experience of discord is to the median one, especially when I think of my early days on it and how normie the servers I was stuck in were

Same unfunny trends, same circlejerking, same 10 people only ever speaking, same fucking conversations. Nothing new, nothing special

 No.8571

File: 1727480852305.jpg (169.56 KB, 1000x1000, a4568f.jpg)

this happens to me all the time. I get randomly obsessed with people I don't even know and stalk them through the internet, never interacting with them

 No.8783

File: 1734307103414.jpg (242.29 KB, 850x1202, e607c0d3a9afc8922ec1574748….jpg)

I've taken a liking to this lurker girl on a server that I'm in and holy fuck… I'm afraid my feelings toward her aren't platonic anymore. She has no real friends it seems, or at least no server mutuals. Her total posts haven't gone up to triple digits (and she's been here for a while), she almost always stops typing before giving up, and you can spot her name in a bunch of message reactions.

Her reaction to one of my very personal messages is what piqued my interest. I've never been so moved by a simple heart emoji before, even though she wasn't the only one reacting.

She had her IG profile linked in the bio for a short time… Females nowadays don't have to present themselves anymore in order to get attention, and there's always a mob of thirsty people drooling over everything they say. But she's nothing like that. No apparent friends to her name, no ego, nothing to appeal to horny degens. She's not trying to look good on selfies, rarely talks about herself, doesn't care how stupid some of her posts might be, all that with only a few followers. She's so unfiltered and honest, and holy shit is she adorable.

I hate myself

 No.8788

>>8783
Please tell me this is a copypasta. Anyways new copypasta just dropped

 No.8794

>>8788
Did I really make it sound like that

 No.8802

>>8794
Not really, imo



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