/hikki/ - NEET / Advice

/n/ was and will always be the worst board, did it take you years of study and hours spent in IRC/discord/skype to realize it?

Listen, I agree with you that being a hikkikomori is a terrible and selfish life decision; i'm the one who has been complaining about it lately, but I don't feel that this board ultimately encourages it. People may romanticize it here and there, but I feel that we all recognize that they're just trying to compensate. This place doubles as an environment where we can all wallow in each other's misery and feel a sense of comradery. Ther's a lot more positive encouragement and congratulating of people who leave the life style than defending of it. The hikki life style isn't even the one thing being discussed here. It's not like this is a faux-political board where capitalism is blamed for every problem and dissection is forbidden. Part of me thinks you're baiting. The trip code is really unnecessary.

>Especially if you rely on parents or flatmates for financial aid
What do you mean especially? You're implying there is something wrong with hedonism when it doesn't effect anyone else. If you don't rely on others for aid, how are there any moral qualms with spending your time how you want to?

>>4155
Ultimately because being a hikki/NEET is a choice, not something you are forced into most of the time.
People glorify the difficulties of being hikki/NEET especially when self-diagnosed depression/anxiety is common on the internets (unpopular opinion but just because you want to kill yourself, hate your parents or don't feel like quite in the mood doesn't mean you are mentally ill, it's something that happens to almost everyone at some point in life) when solving the problem is really simple and if you can't do you're simply not trying enough.
It is not hard to:

0) If you can't go outside, just take a walk during nighttime
0.5) If you don't have any social skills, you could do the regrettable thing of playing some FoTM online games and using voice chat
1) Get a job through a newspaper or online
2) Buy groceries and stuff by yourself
3) Once you got a decent saving going or if you still live with your parents, go to uni after some months of the Outside World
4) Get better job
5) Buy stuff you want or complete your life goals or whatever

Why do i put it in such a simple way? Well because it's that simple. I was a hikki for around 7 months and eventually i got so bored of staying inside my apartment that i just rode my bike at midnight everyday.
Socially, i wasn't too fucked up but i just simply couldn't hold a conversation. I played some meme games like CS 1.6 downloaded out of some russian site and joined random Discord communities (which i hate) to talk with strangers.
Then i just looked up a gig, and next year im going to retry uni.

You are right in that it mostly stems in laziness. /n/ seems like it encourages Hikki/NEETdom one is surrounded by likeminded individuals and the hugbox nature of /n/ means that you won't really get "punished" in a sense out of NEETdom.
The frogs don't really help either, look at the catalog.

I am sorry but what you are telling us is like this:
>hey man, why are you so lazy
>just stand up and use your legs to walk
>it is easy, look at me, I can do it so can you
when the person in question is sitting in a wheelchair with a broken spine.

>just get a job bro
this is like telling someone who has $0 in his bank account that he can easily get rich by investing in the stocks market. Once you reach 0, you have to declare bankruptcy and you will not leave it unless someone else helps you out of your pit. With jobs you need references. Who will say a good word about you when you are an unemployable, useless and neurotic manchild afraid of doing everything wrong?

>some jobs don't need references
If the job does not need any reference then it is a shit job that nobody is willing to do. So the turnover rate is high and they are in constant struggle to find people willing to do this type of work. On top of that those jobs are usually paid badly. So why would any sane person leave his comfy life for a job he hates that will still only enable him to live a shitty life?

>suicidal thoughts
they come up when you realize that you have no future in this world and that your entire existence is worthless.
There is no need to prolong a useless existence when you reach rock bottom. I do not encourage anyone to do it but I can understand people who do it. For me the case is that I still have some savings but once those are dried up there is no need for me to breathe anymore.

>>4162
I see that defense used a lot. Like another anon already said, being socially maladjusted doesn't count as an actual disability because there is nothing stopping you from improving. It's not like being in a wheelchair, it's like having muscle atrophy and being unwilling to recover. A sane person would probably do it to ease the burden they place on others. That shitty job is like a stepping stone. It gets you used to a work environment and gives you a reference. If you need a reference, well there it is.

We know it, we're not trying to rationalize it, no one encourages others to be NEET or hiki here.
I swear my computer is fucking overheating because of snow browser lag

>>4163
why would someone who is thinking about death and suicide be willing to do a job at all. Those people gave up themselves long ago and a job is not what they need at all. They need a new vision for their future. What is there to live for if your life is not fulfilling and if you are unable to make it fulfilling.

>social skills can be learned
sure, and if I start practicing today I can become a soccer pro just as good as ronaldo after only 250 years of practice and hard work.

If you are predisponed in a bad position you will lose all motivation because the effort is giantic compared to the other people you see doing it naturally.

>>4166
>why would someone who is thinking about death and suicide be willing to do a job at all.
If they're not clinically depressed, there's nothing forcing them to constantly think that way. If they are, they should at least try to get diagnosed and treated.
>unable to make it fulfilling
If they do not have a medical condition that is untreatable, they are able.
>sure, and if I start practicing today I can become a soccer pro just as good as ronaldo after only 250 years of practice and hard work
Human beings are naturally inclined to be social creatures, while they are not naturally inclined to specifically play soccer. Nobody is expecting any hikki to become a social butterfly with 30 close friends and 500 acquaintances while juggling multiple casual, romantic relationships. Being able to be around, and converse with people in a work setting is very doable. It is not akin to becoming a soccer pro, it is akin to learning the basic rules of soccer to a large enough degree where if you were to play a game, you wouldn't be kicked off the field for too many violations.

>>4167
>it is akin to learning the basic rules of soccer to a large enough degree where if you were to play a game, you wouldn't be kicked off the field
this is a really nice dissection of an analogy

>>4167
>Human beings are naturally inclined to be social creatures

That's not true for everyone. I was diagnosed with asperger autism and was not able to cope with social situations throughout my life.

It's like asking someone to work in an asbestos contaminated building every day, even though it harms their health. It would be cruel and nobody would want to do something like that.

To ask a person who is in a mentaly unstable condition to look for a job and the like with the reason that others can too. It's like asking a blind person to watch the sunset with you.
Of course, the blind man will never see again, whereas a human being affected by the psyche can still recover. But to tell someone he could if he only wouldn't be so lazy and would try, is like denying the blind mans blindness.

>>4169
Well, I had to coax it out of you, but there it is. The diagnosis of, "aspergers", is now being subjected to large amounts of scrutiny. It's not even in the DSM anymore. Regardless, aspergers isn't debilitating enough to prevent someone from getting a job, especially after they learn social customs and figure out how to imitate them well. Didn't you go through any behavioral training in school? If you were diagnosed, it seems like that would have been the case. You aren't blind, you have blurry vision and need to find the right type of glasses. There's life coaches for that. At least start going outside more. Take walks. If you spend time around people, you will get more comfortable with it. No progress will ever be made if you actively avoid others because you're not good at interacting with them. Practice practice practice. What's the worst that can happen? You wont literally die from an awkward social situation. If you go to the library or a convenience store, some place where the interaction is very predictable, paper or plastic, do you want the receipt, cash or credit-card, that would also be a good start.

>>4169
Then why do you frequent /hikki/? Self-pity? Relatable feels? It seems clear you aren't actively trying to improve yourself in a significant way, with the things that do require a semblance of effort being shrugged off with excuses.
Don't take this the wrong way, i just want to know why the average person browses /hikki/.

>>4161
Why are you assuming that all NEETs lack social skills? This might be a common occurence on this board but this doesn't necessarily hold true for everyone.

>>4172
There is a reason i frequently used the term "Hikki/NEET" and not just "NEET".
On the list, i used 0) and 0.5) because they vary from people to people.

I feel like its more about getting rid of the feeling that you are a pathetic slime that has no right to exist. That really and truly you are fine as you are now. If you understand that, you would be a happy, sane, helpful human being. If you have to ask, you do not know, if you know, you do not ask.

Suppose there is a mad lunatic, or even a huge bomb going straight at you, and that there is not a damn thing that could/couldn't be done. How would you feel? The fact that in a few short moments, your life would be over. Every stupid thing you achieved or own GONE. Laziness and hedonism can at times be a virtue. I am not using this to rationalize my "anti social" behavior, but for what its worth, most contributions to the sciences and engineering were from aristocrats whom had an over abundance of leisure. Foolish troglodytes like you would try to shrug it off by saying "Oh, well they're not lazy they actually did something!". Not quite understanding that it was a pure act of love and leisure.

Stop trying to "get" something out of life. If you can't do that, you are a monster. If you can let go, you can do whatever the fuck you need to. Get a job, take up arms to protect yourself in some shit slum you may live in, fight furiously until there is nothing left. See?, because you are not clinging to life and ready to accept DEATH at any moment you LIVE.

It is foolish to call us "antisocial". I think we care deeply about human society, but it is human society that is "antisocial". Given how they treat others that are "too weird" or "unsavory". I don't think I need to give examples, but just to educate ignorant cogs, people considered to put SPIKES on the spots the homeless were sleeping in to make them go elsewhere. The fact you need REFERENCES, PREVIOUS JOB ETC. To get a fucking basic job that sucks ass anyway. Why the fuck would I BEG for something I DON'T WANT? I'll do it anyhow, but it is wholly ignorant to suppose WE are the "antisocial", NO, MY FRIEND, HITLER AND SOCIETY ARE THE REAL ANTI SOCIAL!

The thing for me is really contemplating death and fear. You see, fear is always a function of thought. Of "What is going to happen?!" . Although it is a useful tool, it is also a horrible addiction like heroin. I like seeing my existence like a bubble, coming and going gracefully. Leave your mind alone. Let it simmer down. Let your mud settle.

Do not think "How?". Come off it. If you can't, the devil has already won. I remember I applied to some grocery store and the vile bitch threw a dress code at me simply because I was dressed too casually. It did fuck me up a bit, but I realized that's how its going to be. At first its gonna hurt like hell, but you get used to it.

You see, life is a subtle game of chance and skill. Its only worth playing if you assume conditions are optimal for life. Then come hell or high water you can vigorously roll the dice because you will die inevitably anyhow.

>>4186
What the fuck are you smoking? We are not living in the eighteenth century. We do not live in a feudalistic society. Getting decent grades and going to the library is something anybody with enough motivation and intelligence can do. Any able-minded person can become successful in today's world. There are lots of jobs which simply don't require prior experience. Those kinds of jobs are where you get references. Society is not anti-social because employers expect a certain level of conduct from their employees. It's their fucking business. You are not entilited to the right to wear anything you like. Everything else you wrote was a bunch of contradictory nonsense. It's clear that you took offense to the op because you felt the need to call op a, "troglodyte". I do not feel that neets should be activlely persecuted, but your response fails to rationalize their lifestyle. Part of me thinks this is a very long-winded joke.

How am is one supposed to respond to someone who simply says that a lifestyle is "piggish" and leaves like a cunt? You seem thoroughly convinced that it is so fucking easy. Honestly, living in a feudalistic is debatable as hell. It never was about money and in fact is a convenient and much needed invention. It is about control. The ownership of the means of production. The countless fucking regulations to prevent upstarts. Sure, I have no right to dress how I like in an oppressive Orwellian society. It was a fucking interview for chirst's sake, and I cannot say I didn't learn my lesson. For what its worth, its bullshit and I don't need you to admit it. We comes to terms with it, and move on with our fucking life.

I just love how your ignorant ass didn't fucking read the whole post. Goes without saying the quality of your own intelligence. I am not saying we don't do anything about it, but rather YEAH, IT IS BULLSHIT, BUT CARRY ON ANYHOW! Sort of like the samurai that lived in feudal lands that had to face and contemplate death every day.

Seriously, what the fuck man. Where is your self awareness and compassion? You fucking people let these shit heads like OP piss on you and say "Yeah, I'm probably worthless." FUCK THAT. EVERYONE ONE OF YOU NEEDS TO HAVE A GOOD HARD ASS LOOK IN THE MIRROR AND BEGIN TO LOVE YOURSELF AND LIVE AGAIN. IF YOU CAN DO THAT, THEN YOU'RE GOING SOMEWHERE YOU WALLOWING FUCKING SCUM, ATLEAST KEEP YOUR FUCKING HEADS UP FOR FUCKS SAKE! Peace, fam. You fucking people lack the basic ass self esteem to be cool around. Fuck this forum, fucking lusers stop wallowing in your own piss and shit and letting other shit stains piss on you. This entire forum is a TOP KEK.(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

>>4191
There is a big difference between loving yourself and denying that NEET/kikki stuff is unhealthy and one shouldn't make up excuses for it, we are like this, if you don't like it here you can leave. What's with these namefags just now?

>>4190
I read your whole post, most of it was just nonsensical though, so I had nothing to say about it. Also, I never said it was easy, just possible. It speaks to your intelligence when you put words into others' mouths and twist what they do say to form a strawman. You're so entitled, just like a typical namefag.

I kove how the guy snaps with the caps and how he barely manages to write coherent sentences, then calls us a laughing stock.

>>4170
Just because Asperger's is not in the DSM anymore, does not mean it is not a valid disorder. As research progresses symptoms for disorders get reevaluated and if necessary, as in the case of Asperger's, changed.

Asperger's now falls under Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and is more closely related to Social Communication Disorder (SCC). From what I understand, SCC is the more accurate diagnosis for those with symptoms of Asperger's in previous versions of the DSM, but since the classification is so new, there is not as much funding (think NEETbux) to people with that diagnosis, so they get diagnosed with Autism.

So yea, it's not right for you to ignore someone's diagnosis as their reason for being hiking just because the disorder isn't in the DSM. Things are alot more complicated than that.

https://www.autismspeaks.org/what-autism/diagnosis/dsm-5-diagnostic-criteria

>>4419
> So yea, it's not right for you to ignore someone's diagnosis as their reason for being hiking just because the disorder isn't in the DSM. Things are alot more complicated than that.

That should be "reason for being hikki"

>>4419
Okay, fine. I realized that myself after making that post, but that split hair does not invalidate the rest of my post.

>>4419
AutismSpeaks is cancer. Try researching harder before spewing white noise. See ASAN for starters.

>>4167
>>4170
You have absolutely no idea what you are talking about. "Just get treated" LOL. If you don't have autism or clinical depression then just stfu about how to deal with it.

Personally I see Hikkikomori as a right in a world where I cannot be left to myself and live off the land.
It is basically impossible for me to live in todays society in a first world country without getting the right from some form of authority.
there are laws and regulations on everything, and for that reason I see Hikki lifestyle as a right, at least until the option of taking a pill to opt out of life becomes a reality.

>>4155
I don't remember asking

Romanticising hikkidom is a cope for most of us. It’s hard to admit your life is at a dead end and easier to just ignore the pain, put your head in the sand and claim that the wagies have it worse and NEETdom is so much better. Denial is the easiest option to deal with hurt, the first stage of grief.

As for encouraging asociality…yeah. Gathering a bunch of people who avoid social interaction at all costs based purely on said avoidance tends to bring that about, who would have thunk it??

Also >>4160
OP is probably gone but whatever

online psychologists are the worst

so?

>>4161
You are the most classic example of someone who was able to get over one particular struggle and now shames anybody in a similar position as his in the past. You simply feel a certain sense of power over the people here you consider to be "inferior" (since they have not done the same as you), and you enjoy lecturing them as a demonstration of your superiority. It is a consequence of your own insecurities, maybe because you hate the part of you who stood in his own room for 7 months, maybe because you fear you may go back there, probably because there's some other area in your life where you feel inadequate, and thus you need your act of "superiority" to compensate.
The "need for help" which translates into belittlement, insults or aggression isn't such, but the manifestation of a problem in the person in and of itself.

>>4161
What an awful series of posts.

Old thread, but thought I'd drop a much needed reality pill.

Maybe 30 years ago, the "just get a job lmao" posts would have some merit to them. But it's too easy to fall into the hikki/NEET trap and never escape. Jobs aren't exactly plentiful anymore, and you'll be lucky to even find one that pays above minimum wage. There's no point in even trying.

Honestly I gave up and went on autismbux, it was the wisest decision tbh. Also get free healthcare, which is something that most employers fail to provide. I highly doubt I'd be better off as a wagie who barely scrapes by, along with the added stress of a job that doesn't even pay the bills due to the acceleration of fiat currency devaluation.

>>7951
People tend to ignore the part about the world getting worse and worse and pin it all on us having to get over our personal tragedies.

I didn't even fully read the OP and I knew OP would make an ass of himself like this.

>>4161
7 months lol, fuck off

>>7951
Hope you get kicked off ssi you lazy degen(HIKINEET SITE (USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST))

>>7951
I like you anon, you seem wise. Newfag here, but was there ever a time before this board became overrun by holier-than-thou types and nahtzees? When it was just people who had become neet one way or another and were trying to get along?

if you say that i think you've just wasted your time judging boards through your bias when you could actually study psychiatry, psychology and sociology.

now, don't get me wrong. i agree that it is unhealthy and undeniably selfish to make others pay for your self destruction.

but mental disorders are EXACTLY that. having an undesired condition - often because you were raised by the wrong environmen - that makes you do bad things to yourself and others even if you don't want to.

it's like you're telling someone with pneumonia to breathe well just because YOU are perfectly healthy. of course, pneumonia is treatable and curable, hikkikomori is as well. but both take time, money, energy. it is not gonna happen instantly, no matter how much you yell at the sick to get better already. you're just verbally abusing them for something they literally can't do. in other words, you're being petty and irrational.

>>8688
well said