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/hikki/ - NEET / Advice

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🎉🎉🎉 Happy Birthday Madotsuki! 🎉🎉🎉

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Why is life so hellish when you're not socially adjusted enough for the standards of others?
I'm constantly mistreated and looked down upon for even making the slightest signs of nervousness. It sucks.
Makes me want to halt all potential progress of becoming more in tone with society and revert back to my NEET lifestyle.
Because it's shelter from the hideous personalities the general population tends to have towards someone who comes off as distinct in whichever terms. I'm getting tremendously sick of it..only been a few months since I've stopped being a shut-in. But surrounding myself with this type of hostile environment every single day encourages me that this attempt to adjust is ultimately not worth it. I don't know what to do anymore.
The world is truly a cruel place. I'm not cut out for it.


Seriously, what the hell is this shit about? You keep saying how others hate you and how life is so terrible(in this and other threads), but you haven't yet actually elaborated on any of it. I think you might have some sort of mental illness. You're probably the type who confuses being ignored and not having people throwing themselves at you and wanting to be your friend instantly, with them hating you. If you don't call attention to yourself, you wont get noticed. Simple as that. It has nothing to do with hatred. If anything, you probably hate the people around you. What is this about, "hideous personalities"? You probably think that people have such hideous personalities because they don't fit YOUR standards of decency or whatever. Tell me, has anybody actually harassed you or exhibited clear cut judgment of you unfairly? Did they push you down a flight of stairs or do they start audible talking about you behind your back? A hostile environment is not the same as one in which you don't fit in. Having that kind of mentality is very Elliot Rodger of you.


A portion of your response is probably right. Though I was bullied back in grade school without much mercy, which has caused me to mistrust everyone even if their intentions are positive. Would be forced to comply with the requests or otherwise get physically abused. Like punched or pushed up against the wall. I then started to hate all my classmates regardless of their attitude. My parents never cared for me during upbringing, ignored my very existence for so long. I don't want to harm anyone or anything like that, so don't get the wrong idea. From what I've been exposed to which is a narrow view, I'd say yeah this world is fucked up beyond belief.


Well I don't don't see how any of that is relevant now if you're not still actually being harassed. Did you ever think about why you were bullied? Was it your demeanor or your choice of vocabulary(stop being so needlessly melodramatic in a bookish kind of way). Maybe you should read a book about how to socialize with others. Change the way you speak. You could also get therapy to fix your psychological trauma. Or you could just not. What are you actually upset about right this moment? If it's not harassment, than no, the world is not a cruel fucked up place. There is nobody actively trying to make your life worse right now, so I don't see what the problem is. Why do you even need friends? Do you really want them? Why do you need the validation of others so much? You seem to confuse you being fucked up for the world being fucked up. The only person telling you that you can't do it and that you're not good enough is yourself. Keep going outside and keep being rational. Distance yourself from your past. Forget all about it and just move forward. If somebody actually and I mean actually steps in your way, get them out of your way. Don't look for stupid excuses to go back into your comfort zone like, "the world is fucked up".


you say say you don't see how it matters but then go on to say that they should get a psychologist/therapist? what gives? anyway OP I was bullied a lot in school thought I traveled a bit, ended up in 16 different schools, got bullied at boarding school 24/7 practically, abused mentally and psychically, this was four years ago now? I ended up spending like 10 months off school bed ridden :D either way you gotta see someone about this, like I would really recommend it from someone who has been in a similar situation


just wanted to say that I like this pic


Sex! God! Sex!


Goddamn Anon, stop talking.
Well if you seek professional help i.e. psychology then I'd rather not. It never worked out. I've realized it's a waste of both money and time. Expensive as it is as well. I'm okay by myself. Just need to find an alternative when it comes to interacting with my outside surroundings. I get frightened very easily by the slightest disturbances presented to me. Overwhelmed not to mention. I wish I could shut myself off but that's not possible. I don't know how to open a pathway to trusting those around me. Shit's fucked up.


>Why is life so hellish when you're not socially adjusted enough for the standards of others?
Life is hellish regardless of how you are, unless you're rich and independent.


Always great to see the armchair psychologists ITT are trying to justify this behaviour and are only further re-inforcing OP's beliefs
great job niggers


>I know better than professionals backed by science


>professionals backed by science
how exactly is psychology / psychiatry empirical? Do they plug your head into a machine and measure what parts of your brain is damaged and then can fix you? It has nothing to do with science. They are just experimenting and inventing theories like that pervert Freud.


You don't have any understanding of the scientific method, do you? You observe things, come up with a hypothesis, test it, and publish. If it can be tested in a controlled setting and get the same results multiple times, it is a science. This applies to psychology. Also, have you never heard of MRIs? Psychological problems have been linked to physical and chemical abnormalities in the brain. Experimenting and discovering theories is science you pillock.


Justify what behavior?


What's even the point of using "armchair psychologist" as an insult when this is, in fact, a forum where non-psychiatrists share their advice? I find it highly moronic when people want the "real serious" advice a therapist can provide you and yet people don't go search it in the proper place.

Honestly, the whole chemical measurement is more inside the neuroscience field rather than psychology. Psychology is that sort of pseudo-science like sociology; it's only based on the popular opinion at the time. It's true that it actually tries to be a science because it tries to use the scientific method to explain human behavior, but it's also obvious that it can not predict efficiently what's exactly wrong with people other than through a cop-like game of "this is the culprit" (which inevitably will depend on how good is the therapist and how open the patient is to their problems, instead of actual or empirical data), nor it can hold a theory about human behavior long enough to establish why things happen the way the do.
Notice that I don't have anything against therapists or going to therapy (in fact, I believe that as humans we learn to recognize certain behavior patterns and thus we can, to a certain degree, classify mental illness), but if you want to tell me psychology is a science as solid as, say, physics, then no, sorry, it isn't.
Also I'm not the same anon.


>armchair psychologists
>backed by science


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>Actually really beleiveing you know better than science
Delusional and very sad.

>if you seek professional help i.e. psychology then I'd rather not
>professional help
>armchair psychologists
Stop insulting yourself


I know you're not the same anon. It's a bit unfair to lump psychology in with pseudo-science when stuff like the time cube and astrology are in the latter. While I don't think it is as, "solid", as physics(if you can measure that sort of thing), it is a real science because it can be tested and results are consistent between these tests. Experiments have been done on monkeys to see how they react to abuse and affection, and the results were predictable and seem consistent with some human behavior. That's just one of many examples.
An inflated ego, and low self-esteem, are a deadly combo.


I've learned quite a bit reading up on the mgtow philosophy and spending time with my nephew (who slings the shit quite regularly due to his gangster musical tastes). Whatever else you've been told, this world operates according to natural law– survival of the fittest. To display weakness or any sign of being "phased" invites others to attack you, disrespect you… it's really no different than how monkeys will behave in a pack.

The question should really be who's society do you want to be in tone with? Some hippies made their own families, Manson had a family, and many different religions will go after the same thing– even while being on the outs with society at large.

One thing I've learned in my time is that the general population is soulless; you can't join up with them after being beaten down with a stick. No, it's better to think of yourself as an isolated island; so if you want to make a go of it, you need to find like-minded people. Finding the other islands is all that matters, because in the sea you'll drown. Against the sea you'll need blinders, batten down the hatches, a false personality. I've been dealing with going out into this hurricane as well for a number of years; exposing myself when the energy levels are high, taking frequent breaks, and sometimes outright telling people to fuck off and then seeking a different solution. Cash is definitely one of your better friends since it allows you to get things done without relying on favors; if someone in your world doesn't work then cut them out of it fast and hard.

Not to discredit some of the other posters, but there are such things as "hostile environments." Take for example something as relaxed as a room dedicated to boardgaming at a convention. You might go up to a number of groups that have four at a table, who will give you the cold shoulder and the evil eye even though they haven't started the game yet. Those kind of fuckers will exclude you. So the trick is to walk around more, perhaps pick up some snacks, and eventually run into the incomplete groups who are looking for bodies. At the last convention I attended, I made it a point to circulate and struck up positive conversations three different times. Also I attended a trivia panel, played laser tag, and watched a fireshow. The main trick with something like this is to give yourself options, don't hang around where you've gotten a shit deal and where you're being bullied. If you get bad vibes from anyone, flick them off your plate like a pea– it's simply not worth getting mentally fucked up over.


Why do you mean by, "learned"? If you're implying that those people have the right idea, they don't. MGTOW is a pointless movement made by insecure people who feel the compulsive need to group together. A movement about being your own person is self-defeating. People should be able to deal with others to the extent where they aren't inconvenienced by their inability to do so. Being social and going to conventions is separate from simply living your life comfortably and without major conflict. That doesn't mean letting people walk on you, it means being able to handle them. People giving you the cold shoulder shouldn't be this unbearable thing to you. It's insignificant. You shouldn't have to avoid people to feel comfortable and focus on yourself. Again, a hostile environment only exists when people are ACTIVELY harrasing you.


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you might base your actions upon the field of psychology which is a science, but that doesn't mean much when your methods are as unscientific as can be
armchair psychologists in my experience rarely deviate from meaningless platitudes on par with "just put yourself out there"


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>if you seek professional help
>professional help

We're talking about anons saying that psychology and therapy(with professionals who know better) doesn't work.

My point was: Psychology is a science, it works, and psychologists know better than everyone ITT about how this whole thing works and anyone disagreeing is simply wrong and kind of cocky.


The armchair psychologists who I was earlier complaining about, largely due to their poor methods, are in fact, not professionals
and I would argue that in any case saying 'I'm right you're wrong and if you disagree then you're just cocky' is far more cocky than anything I've said


I am not saying "I am right and you're wrong" I am saying psychology, and psychologists are right, and if you disagree with them about how this works, then you are absolutely the cocky one and that's the ultimate truth.



Man, you're so passive aggressive it would be a waste of time to engage all your little digs; I'll just keep it to the main. Yeah, I've gotten the cold shoulder so many times that I've ACCEPTED that people are never going to have my best interests at heart. There's no room for "being me" in their bottom line, so I make my own world.



kek Psychology is a joke. Good luck getting better!


>kek, I a random anonymous user in a weeb imageboard with no experience in the field know better than every professional psychologist in history.


Oh, yeah, of course because I didn't adhere to your arbitrary code of conduct it's a waste of time to actually acknowledge my points. Better just call them digs to invalidate them instantly. God, you fags are insufferable.
See, now you should be able to tell the difference between passive and actiive agression.


I was bullied a lot when I was preteen, it still hurts 15 years later and killed my ability to trust people.


same. until this very day …


I fucking love science!!!

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