No.3850
>>3847You take a good look at every single piece of the poster, but you can't see anything relevant on the upper side.
When taking the pieces on your hand, you realize there's some text on them.
The first piece says "A whole Melon".
The second piece says "I'd fit".
The third piece says "pockets".
On closer inspection, you also realize that the bricks on the wall the poster was attached to are newer than those around them.
You may be able to break them if you find something hard enough.
>Please input new command. No.3853
>>3851The cell door is made of some rusted, hard and heavy metal; your best guess being iron.
The door-hole is pretty big, which implies the mechanism is opened with some sort of giant key.
When you try looking through the bars, you realize you can't see much due to the lack of lights, but for the looks of it, there seems to be a stone corridor that resembles a dungeon.
Maybe if you used the lighter you may be able to some more.
No.3855
>>3852When touching the bricks, you realize one of them comes off pretty easily.
Inside the empty space, there seems to be a melon, a note, and something made of metal in the back. However, you cannot take off the other bricks, and therefore you cannot check what's the thing the back.
You can take the note and the melon, though.
No.3856
>>3854When you use the lighter, you realize there's an air current in the passage, due to the trembling flame of your zippo.
When inspecting some more, you realize there are two red eyes looking at you from the outside. You also can hear, although with difficulty, a hissing gurgling coming from the same direction.
No.3858
>>3855Take and examine the note.
No.3862
>>3858You take the note. It's titled "Surviving Guide", and has the following tips:
>Melons are your best weapon.>Stay away from the water.>Trust no-one.>If it has a mod tag, run.>Preasul is dead.>Remember, it's not a crime if you're not caught.While wondering what's the meaning of all of this, you realize that there's what looks like a map in the back of the note. You don't understand why it's written in japanese though.
In the meantime, you save the map in the second slot of your inventory.
No.3863
>>3861Just after putting the map in your inventory, you decide to check the door again and try to see if you can communicate with the red-eyed thing. But before that, you see an envelope on the floor which wasn't there just a few seconds ago.
When you try peeking out to see if the red eyes are still there, you realize that they dissapeared. The gurgling hiss is gone as well.
>please input a new commandAlso, where's the other guy. It's not as fun if I'm the only one leading all this. No.3864
>>3863Examine the envelope.
No.3865
>>3864Inside it you find a giant key. Considering the size, it's probably the key of the cell door. There are no messages or other attachments on the envelope.
The item is added to your third inventory slot.
>please input command No.3869
>>3867Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. OPEN ZE DOOR!
No.3874
>>3872Demand to see voice's manager.
No.3875
>>3872Wonder if you are actually Tom from Ruby Quest
No.3876
>>3873>>3874You open the door while demanding to see the manager of whoever-was-there. All you can see due to the poor lighting is a fat shadow on the threshold, so you decide to use your lighter to have a better look at the face of that person. Soon enough you're taken aback by the sight, because you realize that the voice was actually Presul, the dead admin of the site, who is a tank-fag and therefore gay. The EX on his title means "extra" and also implies that he's even more powerful than a normal boss. Not only that, he's got a knife on his left hand, and he approaches you suddenly while you're still puzzled by the situation.
You currently have no weapons and your only means of defense is trying not to get stabbed by either his knife or his dick.
You're prompted with four commands:
>Fight>Surrender>Flee>Do another action>|->Go back to the hole in the wall.>|->Use Item.>>3875No, you are Oekaki-san from
The Legend of Uboachan.
No.3877
I hope you can use Youtube as weapon soon.
No.3881
>>3878offer melon in exchange for secrets
No.3882
>>3878>>3881You try using the melon but you don't have it in any of your inventory slots, losing a turn and getting stabbed in the leg in the process.
You lose 15 Health Points and you're bleeding.
No.3883
>>3882You should really try to avoid people who try to stab you because getting stabbed is unhealthy. I personally suggest this course of action to Oekaki.
No.3885
Preasul OP pls nerf
No.3888
>>3887In the heat of the fight, you decide to pretend to be dead. Preasul is fooled by the act, and proceeds to unfasten his pants. Then he forcefully penetrates your mouth with his own dick, shoving it deep enough to deliver 30 health points of damage. You also lose another 5 points due to the bleeding.
This is your last chance to revert the situation, and thus prompted with the following commands:
>1) Fight>2) Use Item>3) Go back to the hole in the wall. No.3889
>>3888Retreat to the hole in the wall.
No.3890
>>3888Kick him in the groin
No.3891
what the fuck happened here, I thought this would be cute
No.3894
>>3889You stand up again and push preasul, who did not expect such a movement, onto the threshold. While he falls onto his own butt, you rapidly go to the hole in the wall again and take the melon. Suddenly, you the melon starts to glow, and by some mystical forces not even you understand, its power makes you yell the chant:
A WHOLE MELON.
The glow grows even stronger, and you yell the second chant:
I'D FIT.
You don't even finalize the magical spell when the melon flies straight into Preasul's ass and blows the shit out of him, leaving the room full of bloodstains and his vicera. You dealt a critical hit in his lower parts, hitting by 150 Health Points and killing Preasul instantly.
You gain 15 points of experience and you also level up. Now you can access the "Magical Skills" tabs too, and earned the "Melon Magician" title which allows you to master the melon path. Your fist skill is "Melon attack".
You're still bleeding though, so you lose another 5 health points, being left with 34 health points out of 100.
>>3891I said he was a tankfag and therefore gay, nobody fought back and, hell, oekaki even pretended to be dead. It's only natural.
No.3896
>>3895Oh yeah, Fraud also cured your bleeding too.
No.3898
>>3895Ask "Is Kikiyama kill?"
No.3902
>>3899You ask Fraud about this place. He answers:
>This dungeon is… Uboachan… as represented in a side universe, smaller and parallel to your own. You were once a lurker of said website, but due to causes unknown to me (and that you have forgotten before coming here), you passed away in the real world. Seisatsu, the owner of said site, fucked up so many times while fixing the bugs on the code, that he accidentally casted a spell that once in a while summons the souls of its users to this place.>If it helps you, think of this dungeon as the website, being represented by floors (which are the counterpart for boards), and rooms (which would equal threads). Actions done by you will have consequences in the real website, on the real world. That means that you can interact with the real website through anything you do here. But be careful; since this is actually a representation of the website, its users (and its mods as well) can interact with you, and just as your actions have consequences on the site, their actions will have consequences on you too!. That's why you have to be very careful with all your actions.>We're currently in the 5th floor, which would equal the board "/o/". Floors go from above to below; that means that the "floor 1º" is actually the one that's most at the top. Floor 0 is the news entry; many tried going there, but none have returned. I do not currently know the causes, as my masters have abandoned me every time before going there. My own theory is that they can travel through different websites (or their parallel worlds counterparts, if you may), and those users become those ghosts no one knows of that populate the net.>About the rooms, many are locked, but from time to time you can enter some and participate on any discussion that's there, or even find items or users to help you. On the other hand, you can also find violent or vicious users, who will attack and even try to kill you, so please be very careful.You can still ask another two questions.
You're prompted with the following options:
>What are you?>Is there any way to get out of here, or at least any objective?>Ask another question (not prompted in this post) No.3903
>>3902Ask "Have you ever read Frankenstein"
No.3905
>>3902>Ask another question (not prompted in this post)And tell him:
>My gf abandoned me im depressed, I never go outside anymore, except everyday for school, I'm also self diagnosed with PSTD schizophrenia spectrum disorder, paranoid rectum and autism, my gf abandoned me because she hates mentally ill people, absolutely not because I talked trash about her to everyone and ruined her social life, nevermind her, I already replaced her with my ghost girlfriend, her name is Pupi, say hi Pupi!>Pupi: Hai :DI am also neet and hikikomori, I know they are synonyms, sometimes I read the Official Yume Nikki manga to cope, I identify myself with the main character, Madotsuki, you probably never heard of her, still, I have depression, what should I do Mr Fraud?
No.3909
>>3908Pick up Fraud-kun and examine Preasul'S corpse.
No.3935
>>3934I had hopes somebody else would get on the drawfag wagon… too bad.
>>3909You approach the corner where the remains of Praesul##(EX)Admin are for some inspection. His entrails are splattered all over the walls, and there's blood all over the floor among some other organs. In between all the guts and gory, you manage to find the knife he used to stab you. You save it in the 4th slot of your inventory. Meanwhile Fraud laughs while yelling "Allahu Akbar!".
>please input new command
