No.13401
Out of the last 7 years of my life I've spent 5 as a NEET and to answer your question
>Can this be called a life?
No, I wouldn't call it living. I have, in fact, referred to my own life as "half-life" or "staying alive" for some years now. I don't have any passions or ambitions in my life and I'm not a very smart person to begin with so it's not like I could ever achieve more than a mediocre, drudgery filled life out there anyways, is what I've told myself for as long as I can remember.
I know most people don't have ambitions or passions either and they settle for a mediocre life and have 2,5 kids and they're very happy with their lives. I don't think that kind of lifestyle is for me however. I don't have any close friends, I'm not part of any chat rooms, MMO guilds, blogs or anything like that either. I find it hard to even imagine a situation where I could date someone in my situation. What would I talk about? The best eromanga I've read recently or my perpetual struggle with the Rubik's cube? My desire to love and mate and all that shite seems to come and go every few years and it leaves me as helpless and heartbroken every time. I wish that part of me at least would just go away because it's distracting me from trying to fix things in my life that absolutely need fixing before any meaningful relationship can take place.
I don't know what's kept me going all these years. I live in a country where it's extremely easy to drop out of life anytime you like. Just teach yourself bullshit the social security workers when need be and numbers appear on the bank account and money comes out of the wall. It's so ez that I simply haven't felt like offing myself yet. What a wonderful, horrible life.
Last summer, however, I found a sort-of-a-hobby that's kept me very well occupied until now. I've had periods of sheer terror and intense frustration but also moments of intrigue and genuine excitement. I've not felt such emotions in years except when I've taken the right drugs for the purpose. Lately I've been discouraged by my lack of progress in this particular hobby as well (no surprise there), because of my limited learning capabilities.
I've spent enough time on imageboards to figure out that there are people who are able to take NEETdom as a learning process and eventually find their own thing through it. These people seem so motivated to learn, so imaginative and intelligent that it seems almost miraculous to me. I wish I could be one of these people but nothing seems to help. I've tried healthier diets, excercising, SSRI, SNRI and tricyclic meds, therapy, vitamins, fish liver oil, Ritalin, magic mushrooms and DMT.
I lost my train of thought but anyway, I'm giving it my all this year for one last time. Even if social interaction to me seems like an impossibly difficult multi-faceted ritual. Even if I'm an awkward, insecure and dumb little manchild with nigh zero life experience or any other experience whatsoever. I've come to the conclusion that if there's any one year to try and break this cycle of idiocy and seclusion, it's gotta be this one. So watch out world cause here I cum!
___,- - -C==(_)_)
No.13402
So, uh:
>Can this be called a life?No
>What do you live for, /n/?I live to function
>Do you respect your lifestyle or do you loathe yourself for it?I loathe myself for not being able to maintain this lifestyle in a respectable manner. Just slumping into an abyss where yr mind draws a blank all day long with things like "titties" or "pizza" occasionally flashing in it is pretty fucking gross.
>>13401 here sry 4 blogging I got carried away.
No.13403
>Can this be called a life?
It is a life. Your heart is beating and you are processing food and doing activities. It's not a very nice way to live especially if you are a hikki, but it can be alright if you still leave the house and occupy yourself with things other than the internet. The self loathing and apathy/indifference is still always there.
>What do you live for, /n/?
To put it very simply, to let my life play itself out. Most people don't fully realize that there is no such thing as a self-made man, and peoples lives are intertwined with those of others. If I was meant to affect someone positively or make someone smile or think about things, or go through significant experiences and learn from them, good or bad - I am fulfilling my purpose. I do not want to cut the possibilities, because life is ever changing. Good to bad to good to bad and I don't care about the bad lasting so long, or the good ending, because another cycle will come.
> Do you respect your lifestyle or do you loathe yourself for it?
I'm content with it in a way that I know I can't live in any other way in a state I am in right now. I am going to therapy and I'm working on improving that state, and consequently becoming capable of living a non-NEET life. I get thoughts about how useless I am every day, but it's just that, thoughts. My actions are leading me to a better life.
No.13407
I would say this is not a life, its more like being undead.
It may sound silly nowadays but i want more from life than life itself, i want some sort of purpose, something i could actually live for.
I would like life to be an adventure, tough knowing how things like these turn out its probably for the better as it is.
Except for my depression and insecurity i dont particlarly blame myself for this life.
I made a few mistakes that i could not have know about and missed opertunties i didnt see at that time.
But all in all i can say i did well and keep trying and my time is not entirely wasted.
No.13412
I loathe myself for it. I think the only thing that keeps me from suicide (aside from the fact that I'm a pussy) is the internet.
I have dreams, the specific ones seem unobtainable in my lifetime due to the amount of time I've wasted and the vague ones… well, they're pretty vague.
I'd be perfectly happy living in a tiny box-room with a cooker, futon, computer with internet and a separate toilet and shower compartment. What really makes me unhappy is the inherent lack of independence, NEET or not. I just want to have internet, shelter and an organic vegan diet, and to otherwise be off the grid, but it's a very vague and I guess naive wish. Also seemingly impossible due to the inherent dependence on money.
I'm not sure what I'm going to do. I've been a NEET for 3 years since leaving college without a diploma and I've never had a job before.
No.13424
>>13399Being a NEET is mentally draining, constantly feeling like a failure and a bother to others
But work is equally draining
I think the 8 hour work day and 5 day work week is just too stressful to get used to
I'm sure most NEET's would be willing to get a job if it were a 4 day work week or 4 hour work day
It's sucks having money but no free time
But it sucks having free time and no money
No.13425
Well, besides of studying 4 hours in the evening, I don't do anything. So we could say I'm not a NEET by definition. But I'll pretend I'm one…
The thing is, I don't have a clear objective in my life, it's hard to have an objective in a world that you barely know; but I enjoy living it, even if I don't have as many experiences as other people.
I've chosen to live in a way that I consider poetic and minimalist, I don't want to be known, I don't want to be around big crowds, I want to dedicate my life to be happy inside of me, I remember a book I read not so long ago that said something like "Some people, the ones with a complex and rich internal life, build an impenetrable fortress inside their heads, where they keep all their feelings and all their experience, and it might resemble as fortress for us, but for them is a palace."
And in regards to avoiding pain, doesn't everybody avoid it?
No.13456
i've been thinking lately: Why are NEETs shunned for living the way that they do? I never asked to be born; life is suffering. However, only through suffering do we grow. I would like to consider myself a stoic, but I am not that mature yet. I would recommend most to read Epicetus' Enchiridion. I've realized that I'm not mentally stable, and that truly scares me. How am I to live the rest of my life? When I (my parents) am unable to pay for my livelihood will I become homeless? I know that I am alive, I love myself most of the time, but I think that societies' values are weighing on me and bringing me down. I just wish to be free.
Sorry for the incoherent rant, I just felt the need to vent.
No.13474
>>13456NEETs are shunned because they are generally seen as leeches and cheats by those who live normally.
If everyone has to work and suffer to survive, how come they get away with doing nothing? That's the gist of it at least.
People forget that being alive isn't something you have to earn, and that everyone is allowed to live however they please. Some ways are simply safer and more socially accepted than others.
No.13523
>>13456>>13474Being alive isn't something you have to earn, but reaching your goals in life.
Objectives are different for each person.
It is politically correct to study, work and be useful to society, and NEETs are not, someone who, according to this society lives with the only purpose of breathing until death arrives is often labeled and judged as the worst kind of parasite and that's all about it.
Now, why is bad to be lazy? I don't know
No.13524
>>13523It is because people are both insecure of their life not knowing what for or why they work and also they know how fairly pointless their work is, since they are schooled into slave mentality they place most, if not all of their identity in their occupation.
Another aspect is they are afraid from admitting that they arent really needed, knowing the reprecusions in this soceity if people would accept that most work is unneeded, which it is and has to be accepted sooner or later, one way or another.
No.13528
>>13524>what for or why they worklol I work exactly because of the goals I want to achieve
>most work is unneededWoah stop there Mr. anarchy
No.13529
>>13528You don't have to be an anarchist to know that a lot of work is unnecessary, overly complicated, should be automated, and so on.
No.13530
>>13529My point is, there is freedom in work, in whatever if it makes you happy.
No.13659
I don't know, man.
Currently, I aim to create more wealth. I don't mean it as in making money, just things of value.
>>13402 - Don't worry about it, that was a decently interesting read. Good to hear you've found some kind of hobby. Also, once find the right method to solve Rubik's cube, it becomes incredibly easy every time.
No.13661
>>13399no different from everybody else.
>>13401having a day job is the same feels.
>>13412you think having a full time job will be different?
>lack independencehow can you run an organic vege garden and build your inawoods cabin if you can't even bag groceries?
now try this exercise… imagine you have your inawoods unabomber shack and garden. you're all set up. what do you do now? this is the basic problem with contentment, how are you going to make something of your life now that you've achieved your goal? you could learn to paint or write or produce something at least once of worth.
>>13523people who work pointless day jobs like bagging groceries or call centre positions I see as the real sad sacks.
>hate life>can't be bothered to do anything with it>devote life to meaningless tasks you dont enjoy>>13524this. the vast majority of work is unnecessary. but because of the whole idle hands problem, the mass media likes to play into the whole, if you're not a doctor you're a worthless POS, what are you doing with your life?
honestly, take solace in the dao de jing. people only "respect" the wealthy and successful because they can take the most from them. think of them as stupid blonde sluts. this is why people are super polite and friendly to these people. because they have something they want and may not realize that they're just manipulating them to try and garner favour. it goes something like, "behold the wonder of the crooked tree. no carpenter shall turn it to lumber. just as the cripple shall never be drafted."
