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/n/ - NEET

Advice / Social / Basement
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The Uboachan Dream World MUD is back online, sorry for the downtime.

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Being alone sucks. I try to not think about it too much and keep myself busy with videogames but when I go to bed it comes back

how do you cope?


My loneliness is more of a situational thing, so I do my best to constantly stay in touch with old friends that have since moved across the country. Otherwise, I just drown myself in work.


There are other things you can do besides videogames if you are alone, I have been there.
How? My job, luckily it eats my time and adds a little human contact.


I make stuff. Music, drawing, making vidya, video editing, whatever. As long as its hard, it always puts me in a sort of mindfulness that makes me forget I'm completely alone. Plus it gives me skills I wouldn't have if I ignored it by playing video games or watching TV or something.


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When I feel alone, apart from games or anime, I usually study, since it keeps my mind away from reality and helps me in my career. If not, I make chainmaille jewelry to sell later in music stores or medieval/fantasy-related events. It's kind of a part-time job but I am my own boss and I don't force myself.
I also do some programming just for fun (though it is linked to the profession I'm aiming for, so you could call a study too).

Another thing I do is read a lot about things I can apply to my business and earn more money.


If you have a hobby where you can achieve something gives something to think about and helps a bit, but it aint a substitute ofcourse.


It's odd, but although I used to feel rather dependant on other people, the farther I drift from them the easier I feel and the less I want to reconvene


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Though when I think about it, I guess I don't really want be alone, but it feels less bothersome this way, because the bad seemed to usually outweight the good for me in my past relationships

I don't even really know how to connect with people anymore, like the spark is gone or maybe I just need to find the right people?

But people tend to be kinda shitty, the few that aren't have too differing interests and the rest you'll probably never meet

I've always envisioned about stuff I'd like to do with friends, but been unable to bring it to reality

I just feel so jaded I don't really want to try anymore


I think my main problem is that I am unsatisfied with what I am given, mainly the people in my life. I guess hobbies are the way to cope. For me it's making music.

I have to admit, I'm gradually losing inspiration by the day and I get distracted by other negative thoughts. I think simply finding a hobby is the wrong solution to a problem that needs to be fixed for the sake of my well-being.


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Reki is the best.
I do understand you, but I'm schizoid while maybe your feelings are because of your situation. You don't HAVE to be close with anyone; a lot of people will tell you that being alone is unhealthy, and while that's true for most "normal" people, it's not for me and I've only caused more discomfort being close to others. That's just how I'm wired.


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Gotta agree.
I feel much more relaxed and clear-minded now.

It was like I was constantly emotionally entangled with others and couldn't focus on much else. It became exhausting, but I couldn't just break off for some reason. I guess I was seeking some sort of closure.


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I got a dakimakura, so I can clinch to it and cry myself into sleep or just hug it and tell myself, this is what I want.

I found a real life community, joined a sports club of my hometown, so I have human contact occasionally. Also I stay in shape.

Furthermore I think about getting a pet. I'm more the dog type person, but a cat would probably be easier to handle and cheaper.


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I talk with people on the internet, using mostly skype and various imageboards. It doesn't always help my loneliness, but I really can't interact with people irl. So I don't think I will ever have any real friends, even though I can't cope by being alone all the time. Things like video games, anime, comics are becoming less effective to take my mind off bad thoughts and stress. I'm waiting for the time when I can live with my life partner, a person that makes me feel good the most.


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Honestly, ever since I started spending a lot of time with friends on Skype I haven't felt any of those random pangs of overwhelming loneliness.


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NO![spoiler]you be mine first.[/spoiler]


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The first part of feeling better about my situation was realizing that I don't need to go out and socialize to be happy. In fact, I don't -need- anything but myself to be happy. I am introverted and doing things that don't involve other people is often preferable to me over social situations. I rarely ever felt lonely, and now I never do, because I live with another person.

When I did feel lonely, talking to people online would ease it pretty quickly. In fact, all of my friends are online, and that's okay. I had a conversation with someone about how there is a lack of deep and meaningful conversation on the internet - which is true - but if you manage to achieve it and share your worries, happiness and thoughts with other people for a lengthy amount of time, it really is like having IRL friends, and often even deeper, because most interactions with IRL friends are nothing but chit chat.



I occupy my time with YouTube videos, video games and watching TV (usually with my sister) to relieve the feeling of loneliness.

However, there's always that one 2 hour or so period where I wallow in self-pity.

You'd think having siblings would help with loneliness, but I rarely share interests with them so I don't talk to them often. If I wasn't so scared of strangers so much, I'd probably try to join a group of Internet people who share similar interests, but I can't even bring myself to talk much on multiplayer text chat in a video game.

This imageboard (in which I practically don't even converse with other users) along with one forum on another website is the only time I "socialise" with people outside my family.


You know, being an only child, I had always figured that I was better equipped to deal with loneliness. But now that I live alone, I'm realizing it's just the opposite. Sure, I'm well experienced with entertaining myself on a short term basis. But being an only child made my friends so much more important to me, which makes it so much harder to be away from them now.


My kindom for a truly loving girlfriend(or even boy at this point).


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Recently I'm living with room mates again.
It helps a lot not living alone anymore. I stopped doing drugs for a month now & quit drinking alcohol against my problems.
But I leaned to live with loneliness. Even though I don't have any friends left and am living in a new town far away from my family I can handle it. As long as I am allowed to write and think nothing can harm me anymore.

In the last few years I realized that I don't need anything besides the freedom of thought. I love to swim through a crowd of people writing about their daily lives. Imagining what they do behind closed doors.
Paper and books are like friends to me. I can tell them everything and they tell me about the world or carrying myself away into my mind.
I don't want a normal job or live the NEET life. Just sitting on a bench staring at the sea, thinking, makes me happy or rather gives me peace and rest in this fast paced world. The world is sick. We are not.
Some of us just don't fit into this unnatural synthetic society man created. To conquer this inculcated crippling fear it is necessary to spend most of your time in your own mind. You can slowly integrate "solitariness" into your state of mind. In the end it is all about perception.


It seems I just keep going back and forwards.

At one point life seems to be just fine enough without any people to talk with, but then wave of apathy starts dragging me back down again, making me long for social stimuli because I'm tired of everything else.

Even if I've experienced the other side and know that it wouldn't necessarily solve anything.

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