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When I was all in for this lifestyle, I accepted that I wouldn't live past 30, which made feel okay doing the same thing in my room every day.

Then I felt death and how precious life is, changed my plans.

The problem is that a commitment to experience an extraordinary life doesn't change me as a person. I'm still painfully average. Nobody wants to be around someone who is an empty vessel, and especially someone who hates themselves for being that way.

I get extremely upset when I read about someone who has done lots of cool things. It's like reading fiction. And it's completely out of my reach. And time is passing no matter what.

Maybe you don't care about living an atypical life, but if you listen closely, is there a voice telling you that you want something else? I'm only trying to ask you if you are afraid of regretting what you are doing now, over the span of these years, when you look back later on.


Yes, but I really don't see how I can change that, so all I wish is that my life would end right now insted of having to live so many more years in this pain.


Why can't you do cool things? Why is it so out of your reach?


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Even though I'm a NEET and pretty self-hating, I do have some hobbies that I sometimes do so I don't waste my time completely. I try to practice drawing and an instrument, even though I'm not artistically inclined at all. It's not a complete waste if I do those things I suppose, but I find it hard to dredge up the willpower to do those things often too. But I mean, it's something, I won't regret it as bad later if I at least do those things, maybe.


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Because I'm too lazy to do anything. I agree it's my own fault and that is what I hate the most, not being able to change it. Suicide is the only escape I can think of, but I'm too lazy to do even that.


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An empty vessel is not so bad, there's a spectrum of people who would like to be around empty vessels. Those who want to help you at one end of the spectrum, and those who want to use you at the other end of the spectrum. And then there are those in between who will ask you to join them and become part of their faith/culture/create/etc. If you cannot find something to do with your life for yourself, then go ahead and give your life away to something else, something bigger and more important to you, something you be proud to be a part of.

>I get extremely upset when I read about someone who has done lots of cool things. It's like reading fiction. And it's completely out of my reach. And time is passing no matter what.

I know that feel, but once you get to know people who are better than you and then see them on an off day when they are subjected to their own pain and misery you will feel better about yourself. You may not feel too proud of feeling better about yourself because of that though…


Because I hate myself so much that I physically choke up when I start to use my vocal chords.

Everything I could do or could be is based on my ties to other human beings. Nobody wants to be around me, so that doesn't work.

Even in their weakness, they will get back up and resume being radiant, wonderful people, just as they should be. I know what you're trying to say, but even embracing that feeling is only a fleeting distraction. Next day, hour, I have to face myself in all my pathetic existence again.

It just doesn't seem fair. Some people naturally bloom. Even through turbulent moments, they bloom, their lives are filled with meaning and they get to reap the rewards every single day. It's hard to stop being focused on the past and victimizing myself. I want to accept it and wake up.


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>I get extremely upset when I read about someone who has done lots of cool things.
I used to feel like this and then I gave up.


Im probably gifted and tallented, but i dont know cuz i never really tried.
Sometimes i think i could do anything i wanted to, but then reality kicks in and im a useless neet again.
But what bothers me more is im in a position capable to do things, i feel obliged to not give up becuase other people dont have the chance and i feel obliged to be useful in my own way not just beacuse i have oppertunity to do so but also because i have seen the negative side of things and feel like should do something, but i am so feeble and impotent.
What bothers me tough is i have no reason to do so, reality isnt real to me anymore and no matter what i do or who for it just feels like something on a todo list.
I dont see the chance to live the life i want to and nobody and nothing being worth to give sacrifice for.

If there is one thing i regret its not being more agressive and daring.
Not dropping out of school and not having tried to see more of the world.
But the world is a mistery to most and usually its too late when we realize this, but who could have told and even then would i have accepted it?
I guess it comes down to now or never.


>changed my plans
So, like every other 20-something down-and-out you conveniently marked that far-off date then lounged around and suddenly thirty notches weren't all that distant anymore?

Do it. Finish something for once in your life


>but if you listen closely, is there a voice telling you that you want something else?

Yeah, but if it's impossible because reality doesn't function like that, why listen to the voice at all?


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>is there a voice telling you that you want something else?
At the moment, no, but I am more familiar with that voice than I'd like to be. That persistent whispering was what caused me to exit my relationships, though doing so seems to have worked out in my favor.

>I'm only trying to ask you if you are afraid of regretting what you are doing now

No, I'm not afraid of that, as I'm not refraining from doing things that I want to do in spite of my engrained habits or inhibitions. Certainly, I may regret not pursuing earlier some goal or cause that I discovered later in life, but I wouldn't bemoan my past decision-making in terms of how I spent my time.

Laziness at its core is a habit. You're used to idling and doing nothing, so your body gripes and groans and complains about violating the habit and being active, regardless of whether or not you want in your mind to do this something. Once you've upset the laziness from its perch atop your brain, however, it won't return unless you let it. That is, if you eliminate the habitual sluggishness and replace it with a more favorable activity, then you'll find that you have the motivation and interest to continue adhering to this new habit.

Unfortunately, as with any other habit, evicting laziness takes a non-negligible level of effort and willpower; it's especially troublesome due to how it makes you by default unwilling to do nearly anything. The technique I use involves dividing any task or goal into sub-problems. Specifically, you take the workload facing you (e.g. "I want to write a story") and extract small, manageable chunks of work from it (e.g. "I'll write X words in this sitting" or "I'll brainstorm and expand upon the ideas I produce" or "I'll draft out a character description for the protagonist").

Another technique entails the following: Set a timer for 15 minutes and perform one of the sub-tasks you created above for that interval of time. When the timer reaches zero, you may stop working if you so desire, but you may also continue at what you're doing for a longer period. Do this at least once a day, or more often if you like – don't forget to take breaks in between multiple spans of work, lest you burn yourself out.

Such tiny bits of work may seem pointless and trivial to you, but that's not true. As long as you persist in these continual small steps forward, you'll gradually cover far greater distances that you would from intermittent pulses of activity separated by voids of absent motivation.

It's true that devoting yourself to a cause can bring purpose into your life, but that's more or less making yourself a pawn in someone else's ambitions. If possible, it's far preferable to utilize your life yourself versus letting it be directed and controlled by others.

>once you get to know people who are better than you and then see them on an off day when they are subjected to their own pain and misery you will feel better about yourself.

In the end, how does that mindset help you? While it may boost your self-confidence in the present and immediate future, it leaves you dependent on the failures of others to appreciate yourself and your life. A healthier approach would be to do your best to assist these people through their times of struggle, then take pride in how you successfully helped them to feel better and to overcome the hardships obstructing their progress.

>Everything I could do or could be is based on my ties to other human beings.
I disagree. When you draw a picture, or code a program, or write something, you can work without directly interacting with anyone; you might make use of resources or guides created by others, but the process of creation can be conducted in solitude. You'll interact with others should you decide to share your work, sure, but at that point you'll already have produced something that you deemed worth sharing without benefit of talking with others, and that is a significant accomplishment.

>but i am so feeble and impotent.
Everyone starts out that way. In fact, you're already off to a good start, since you have the desire to seize the opportunities available to you. You're neither feeble nor impotent, Anon, but rather are merely inexperienced. From what I can gather, one of the biggest things that experience teaches you is that the undertakings that appear to loom above you and leave you feeling ill-equipped to handle them aren't nearly as terrifying or insurmountable as they seem. You have within yourself the strength to prevent these things from disarming you and to push through them. Believe in that ability, your ability. You can do it.


It is funny I was really close to death at one point …for a second I felt pain but then only happiness because I realized I regret nothing.
I might be a empty shell but I enjoy my very existence


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> but if you listen closely, is there a voice telling you that you want something else
Isn't that what everyone does, tell someone else what they want? What they should do and acomplish and try to be? Isn't that society?
On the TV, the radio, in your home, at school, at work, among friends, among family, there's more than one voice.

We used to live to sixty or more well before the modern age, and we live to eighty or more on average now, but for some reason if you haven't done something huge before 25, you're useless and you should be ashamed. Even if you never do anything "important" or "cool" or whatever before you die, and you live a thousand years, you should never be made to be unhappy for it.

I want to do great/big/flashy things, but I'm not in a hurry.



Very few people made it past 60. The average person would've died off before 40, only the well off made it past that. Our lives come with more existential problems these days 'cause we live for so long. The whole mid-life crisis bs.

Honestly, just ask yourself what YOU want to do. It's pretty easy to get caught up with other peoples shit they say, so it can be hard to tell whether you're doing it because YOU want to or because everyone(or perceived majority) else is doing it to some degree.


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Those low numbers generally include children who died very young, like during infancy and childbirth, which was incredibly common. If you made it past that, you had a reasonable shot at a long life. The "sixty" was intended as more of an upper bound, not a lower one, and the "or more" was meant to catch those outliers, not suggest they were common.
My English is shit, man.

>figure out what to do with life without society's wretched influence

>do it
That's the keikaku!


I meant your inner voice. The one that leads you to good things.


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This pressure to accomplish something substantial at a young age originates from society's glorification of those rare, exceedingly brilliant individuals who invent paradigm-breaking ideas, or "the next big thing", or what have you. We see that these people have done something fairly profound despite their age, and there's the impression that, since we're roughly the same age as them, we should be capable of the same things. Thus, there's stress when this unrealistic dream collides with reality, the fact that these super-stars of creativity are exceptions, freaks, outliers, and that it's unfair to expect everyone to be capable of similar levels of sudden insight.

Moreover, thoughts of the flavor, "Why don't I have these great ideas? What's wrong with me? Am I some kind of failure, or too stupid?", start poisoning our thinking. We're told that, if we don't make some big innovation, we're mediocre, unremarkable, inadequate. That is decidedly false. Saying "all people should be super-innovators" is no more realistic than saying "all men should be stereotypically masculine", or "all women need perfect figures and flawless skin to be attractive", or essentially any other generalizing drivel that society pushes on us. That is, this is nothing more than yet another case of society trying to convince everyone that they're insufficient if they aren't as talented or outstanding as the top celebrities and entrepreneurs.

Honestly, great things don't come easily or suddenly. They only arrive after lots of slow, tedious, or otherwise difficult work. In other words, making substantial things requires only a single ability, which anyone can develop if they don't already have it: Perseverance. All you have to do is set a clear goal, start working toward it, and DON'T STOP. If you keep at it, no matter how boring or stressful or seemingly unrewarding it may seem, you'll reach it sooner or later. It's like setting off on foot towards a landmark far off in the distance; you'll get there eventually if you keep walking in spite of the obstacles between you and it.

To be sure, taking breaks and such is critically important, as you'll wear yourself out otherwise. Don't confuse stepping back to relax for a time, however, with dropping the project and starting on something else. Then, you'll end up with nothing more than yet another unobtained goal that will weigh on your mind endlessly and make you feel like you can't do anything (which, to be sure, isn't true at all). Of course, it's possible to pick something back up and continue work on it, but that can be challenging to do, since you'll have lost the momentum you had before and the task will present the illusion of being enormous and doomed for failure.

TL;DR: If you want to do cool things, persevere in spite of how much the work sucks.

>just ask yourself what YOU want to do.
You've found the X on the treasure map, I'd say. I've met more people than I can count that are driven not by their desires or personal interests, but instead only by dreams of well-paying jobs. They don't realize that that's a terribly unfulfilling goal; they'll have plenty of money, sure, but what on Earth will they do with all of it, and will they find their work interesting or pleasant? I feel like these are the same types of people that end up confessing on their death-beds that they had worked too hard, that they wished they had followed their dreams, that they regret chasing a life of mindless consumerism.

At any rate, yes, the best course of action is identifying what fascinates you and sticking to it. That way, you'll never feel remorseful over walking down some dead end based on what society says is important or interesting.

I didn't mean for this post to turn out so long. Sorry about that. ^^;


>They don't realize that that's a terribly unfulfilling goal; they'll have plenty of money, sure, but what on Earth will they do with all of it, and will they find their work interesting or pleasant?

Only someone who never had lots of money could say that. Being rich is awesome and yes, money can buy pretty much anything. They won't nuy love, but that's because love doesn't exist.


So egdy I almost cut myself by reading your post.

You can buy things that make your life comfortable,but you can't buy genuine affection, fulfillment, accomplishment and knowledge, without which your life becomes very bland.


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>I have not experienced x
>therefore x doesn't exist

I can confirm that love exists, and that it can be amazing, safe and fulfilling and destructive and hollowing, just like the cheesy songs tell you.

I can also confirm, as someone who was once homeless and habitually starving, and now in a secure infinite money to you position, having money, regarding your feelings and mental state in the long run, doesn't change a damn thing.


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It's true that, up to a point, people with more money live a happier – or, more accurately, a less stressful – existence than people who don't, since the former group doesn't have to worry about not being able to afford food or pay bills. The state of having money in and of itself, however, doesn't mean that your life will be fulfilling. Sure, you can satisfy any impulse that may streak through your mind, but the enjoyment derived from that would be shallow and fleeting; it'd be like trying to maintain a fire to warm your house using only pine needles.

You also have to consider how satisfying your job is. Even if it pays handsomely, a job can still be boring and nigh-purposeless, and you'd have to sit and endure that dullness week after week in order to maintain the flow of cash required by your "awesome" lifestyle. Moreover, if you were to take genuine pleasure in your work, then you'd already have a certain level of gratification from that alone, thus calling into question the need for large sums of cash to feel content with your position in life.

Another point for contemplation is what sort of social life you'd have in this wealth-flaunting joyride of a way of living. That is, you'd have a difficult time making friends who take an interest in you and care about you as a person, as you'll be mobbed with people looking to get a cut of or to exploit the mounds of moolah you're throwing all over the place. My intuition is that someone living like that would be terribly lonely, as they'd have little to no honest company amidst the swarm of writhing, thirsty leeches enveloping them.

As far as love is concerned, it seems to me that it does indeed exist, although I can't give any tangible evidence outside of my observation of couples that vocally express their love to one another (and who stay loyal in their marriages, to the tune of several decades of being together). My guess is that you'd have a tremendously frustrating time finding someone who loved you and not your money; so, no, money can't buy love, and in fact would actually serve as a hindrance to its development.


Rich person who has sex on the reg: Yeah, sure i get to tap dat but sometimes I feel this sort of inexplicable esoteric sadness which cannot be fulfilled with thousands of dollars or lots of hot passionate sex. Honestly, cumming inside of someone and making out with them and having enough money to have Andrew Hussie make my fantroll come to life, that kinda stuff does not satisfy me at all.

Le me, 50 years old and still a kissless virg: Wow, this person feels feels that cant be explained by logic. Now I don't feel so bad about being kissless virgdren or worrying about cash money

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